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shaneroks

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shaneroks

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  • Town/Country : ,
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Friday 17 April 1992 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1465
  • Number of comments : 1
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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Visits<b>Recoveryben</b> - 23 hours ago

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shaneroks's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36308) - you deserved it (22107)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my son said his first word. Unfortunately, that word was "cock." I've tried convincing myself that he's trying to say "clock" but I just can't do it. FML

#21225778
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38492) - you deserved it (6689)

On 07/31/2014 at 12:24pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Oregon)

Today, I had trouble carrying a box upstairs because my arms were sore from working out. My mom asked me, "Why are you working out so much then?" I didn't have the heart to tell her it was because of her 100-pound weight gain and that I didn't want to end up looking like her. FML

#21225648
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39663) - you deserved it (6154)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:51am - health - by jogginglikeitsmyjob (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was doing a design sketch for work. I snapped a pic and sent it to my boss. She replied, "Impressive. Nice sketch too." I was drawing at home, naked. My dick was in the picture. FML

Today, I ran into my boyfriend of 5 years. The weird thing was that he was supposed to be in Iran. The even weirder thing was that he was with his wife and kids. FML

#21212869
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66399) - you deserved it (4871)

On 07/18/2014 at 12:49pm - love - by someonepleasehelpme (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML

#21212155
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47380) - you deserved it (5790)

On 07/17/2014 at 7:32pm - animals - by kittynapper - United States (Colorado)

Today, I called my mother crying, telling her how my husband has apparently been cheating on me for months. To my surprise, she didn't interrupt me or cut me off the whole time. Only when she didn't respond, did I realize she'd hung up a half an hour ago. FML

#21200725
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48442) - you deserved it (5328)

On 07/06/2014 at 4:27pm - misc - by ILOVELEDZEPPELIN - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I woke up to my young niece hammering a metal cookie cutter into my leg. I'll have a teddy bear shaped scar for the rest of my life. FML

#21199181
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49605) - you deserved it (4653)

On 07/05/2014 at 1:40am - kids - by umerin - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was reviewing documents at work, only to find one of my coworkers has been signing off on paperwork, claiming he's been walking one of the residents daily. Aside from being a double leg amputee, the patient died two weeks ago. The state review board comes this week. FML

#21198473
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36042) - you deserved it (3442)

On 07/04/2014 at 1:29pm - work - by cakefete2 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had a job interview where I was interrupted for using the word creative because there is "only one creator". FML

#21189976
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39728) - you deserved it (4084)

On 06/27/2014 at 2:11am - work - by IAMALITAHA (man) - United Kingdom (Newcastle upon Tyne)

Today, I looked at my bank balance. It read $1.23. That's higher than it usually is. FML

#21185584
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40138) - you deserved it (7725)

On 06/23/2014 at 5:26pm - money - by amused (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my wife bought a strap-on. I'm about fifty miles beyond terrified. FML

#21184387
262 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56312) - you deserved it (7931)

On 06/22/2014 at 4:34pm - intimacy - by possibly fucked (man) - Portugal (Lisboa)

Today, my doctor got my blood test results from the lab. He looked at me gravely and told me I had just weeks left to live. After I started hyperventilating and crying, he burst out laughing and said he was kidding. He then prescribed me some iron tablets and sent me on my way. FML

#21182241
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50942) - you deserved it (5899)

On 06/20/2014 at 7:03pm - health - by legitfile.bat.virus.exe (woman) - United States (California)

Today, we had a guy come into the hospital with a carrot stuck deep in his anus. I've heard all kinds of ridiculous cover stories, but his took the cake; he claimed the phone rang while he was showering and he slipped onto a box of vegetables. Guess who had to extract the carrot. FML

#21179512
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52319) - you deserved it (4603)

On 06/18/2014 at 3:06pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was going to the bathroom at work. When I stood up, I noticed a little button on the side. I pressed it and the toilet flushed. I've worked there for nine months and just found out today that our toilets don't flush automatically. FML

#21177356
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24168) - you deserved it (42561)

On 06/16/2014 at 10:45pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Missouri)



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