shameless58

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shameless58

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 15 December 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1082
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About shameless58 : Im fuckin awesome!

shameless58's page activity

Visits<b>groovy579</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 9:00pm

shameless58's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

shameless58's favorite FMLs

Today, I babysat a five year old girl. She ran up to me, threw her arms around my waist and said, "YUMMY! I'm going to eat you!" with her face in my crotch. I said sarcastically under my breath, "Finally, some action!" I turned around to find her dad staring at me, having heard. He's my cousin. FML

by tryena / 02/28/2009 at 5:59am / United States (Idaho) / Kids

Today, I stopped at a lemonade stand on my way to work. A cute little girl handed me a mouthwash-sized cup of juice, and her adorable little brother told me it would be $.25. All I had was a $20. He shoved it into his overalls pocket, looked up with huge brown eyes and just said "Thank you." FML

by ripdivine / 02/24/2009 at 12:47pm / United States (Michigan) / Kids

Today, I got a "save the date" card for the wedding of a couple my husband knows. I was excited because I really wish to be better friends with these people. I emailed the bride, "I got your STD!" and hit send before I realized how that sounded. FML

by silkytaco / 02/17/2009 at 12:11pm / United States (Hawaii) / Geek

Today, my friends and I go to a bar and get wasted. I walk around and see a kid. I start yelling, "There's a child in this bar! There's a CHILD in this BAR!" She turns around. She was a midget. FML

by frenchy / 02/05/2009 at 7:55pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous

Today, I decided to send my boyfriend a pic text of me naked. I accidentally sent it to my dad and got a text back saying, "You definitely take after your mom." FML

by ruffrider / 02/05/2009 at 9:09am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

by #201 / 02/05/2009 at 8:23am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, I was masturbating to a girl with huge tits on the internet. I then scrolled down and found out she had a penis. FML

by Noname / 02/01/2009 at 5:17pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, while waiting for class, I let out a huge fart in front of everyone thinking no one would hear it over the music. I was wearing headphones. FML

by Gob / 01/16/2009 at 9:36am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I daringly tried that fish-bath thing, where all these fish come and eat all of your skin's dead cells. I got into it, and after 15 minutes of being a human buffet, at least 20 of the fish died. FML

by anx133 / 01/15/2009 at 8:25pm / China (Shanghai) / Health

Today, I woke up and switched on the TV. The first thing I saw was a picture of a wanted rapist, who looks just like me. I'm afraid to leave home. FML

by mehdi / 10/13/2008 at 4:20am / Miscellaneous