Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?


Online | Search for a member



  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 327
  • Number of comments : 7
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About shakiam014 : There is not much to me but disappointment.

shakiam014's page activity

Visits<b>jazzybrar</b> - the 10/30/2014 at 9:44am<b>Nordrag</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 2:41am<b>ronak</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 3:20am<b>depressingbunny</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 9:00pm<b>Wyaru</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 11:53am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:22am<b>tartar18</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 10:04am<b>TheBrightSide00</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 3:19am<b>nestor666</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 3:09am<b>HumbleExistence</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:47am<b>rustydiamonds</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 2:08am<b>the_real_dvd</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 12:15am<b>capthigh</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 12:05am<b>GuntherRocks</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:33pm<b>Wabbajack789</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 7:44pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 7:39pm<b>lvchick2012</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 7:05pm<b>s0me1ne</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 7:02pm

shakiam014's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.


You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of shakiam014's badges

shakiam014's favorite FMLs

Today, my date mugged me, just minutes after I paid our bill at the restaurant. FML


I agree, your life sucks (16448) - you deserved it (1114)

On 12/19/2014 at 6:27pm - money - by j4 - United Kingdom

Today, I posted a photo on Facebook showing a side-by-side view of me before and after I'd tried out my new makeup. My dad commented, "What is this, Gollum cosplaying an Orc?" My mum, brother, and over 20 "friends" liked his comment. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13706) - you deserved it (2282)

On 12/19/2014 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my girlfriend tried to convince me that she didn't "technically" cheat on me, because the other guy came on her and not inside her. FML


I agree, your life sucks (20391) - you deserved it (1531)

On 12/19/2014 at 11:16am - love - by "technically" my ex-girlfriend - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)

Today, the lady whose son I babysit sent me a text, saying she left a gift for me for all the hard work I've done. I found a beautifully-wrapped box where she said the gift was. It turned out my actual gift was cookies sitting right next to it. FML

Today, I found out my girlfriend and all of our friends have begun referring to the time I was meant to lose my virginity, but couldn't get hard, as the "cheese stick incident." They all think it's hilarious, and the worst part is that it's actually a pretty appropriate description. FML


I agree, your life sucks (21622) - you deserved it (2718)

On 12/18/2014 at 5:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend jokingly said that if I didn't pass my exam, he wouldn't have sex with me for a month. I failed it, and now he thinks I did it on purpose. FML


I agree, your life sucks (24615) - you deserved it (3625)

On 12/18/2014 at 12:59pm - love - by peteto818 (woman) - Bulgaria (Pernik)

Today, my mother-in-law asked for a copy of my son's death certificate so she could have her week-long island beach holiday classed as bereavement leave. FML

Today, I felt a horrible pain while having sex with my wife, and I had to stop. I thought it was a hernia or something, but she called me a liar and accused me of everything from not finding her attractive, to me cheating on her. It turned out I had appendicitis. She still won't apologize. FML


I agree, your life sucks (33560) - you deserved it (2248)

On 12/17/2014 at 3:09pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my classmate commented on how quiet I am. I responded with, "Well, nobody plots murder out loud," trying to be funny. My teacher tried to get me arrested. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29988) - you deserved it (5840)

On 12/16/2014 at 8:54pm - work - by justjoking - United States

Today, I needed to take a dump at school. As soon as I sat down, somebody else walked in. I'm extremely poop-shy, so I was forced to wait for several minutes while they styled their hair and applied makeup. After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then someone else walked in. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26217) - you deserved it (6236)

On 12/16/2014 at 2:26pm - misc - by privatebathroomneeded - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to the lovely sounds of goats having escaped their pen and climbed onto the roof. Again. FML

Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML

Today, I blew my load in less than a minute. I wasn't having sex or even making out. I was spooning. FML


I agree, your life sucks (29559) - you deserved it (5637)

On 12/16/2014 at 7:01am - intimacy - by Extravirgin (man) - Germany (Bayern)

Today, I found out my Nan passed away. My boyfriend came over to comfort me, things got intimate and we ended up having sex. After he came, he chuckled to himself and said, "That one's for you, Nan". FML

Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • The Xmas illustrated FML
  • Here we go, final lap before Christmas is finally upon us. Although, you could say we've been subjected to quite a few strains of Christmas already. The decorations are up since mid-August, and certain family…

Friday 19 December 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: