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shadypalmtree

Offline (the 08/30/2014 at 3:46am) | Search for a member

shadypalmtree

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 16 February 1995 (19 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 282
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

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shadypalmtree's page activity

Visits<b>totallybananas</b> - the 09/14/2014 at 6:34am<b>Infamous278</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 9:49pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:10pm<b>kporter26</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 10:12am<b>homiwan</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 5:54am<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 3:52am<b>brewmasterg</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 1:52am<b>jossii</b> - the 08/15/2014 at 12:31am<b>almostchris</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 10:58pm<b>Abdelhady</b> - the 08/02/2014 at 8:50pm<b>crazymase</b> - the 07/24/2014 at 3:08pm<b>TheAndrewJohnson</b> - the 07/03/2014 at 5:40am<b>steeler088</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 7:53am<b>weveallbeenthere</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 5:19pm<b>ckirksey</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 8:02pm<b>drfifi</b> - the 06/07/2014 at 2:03pm<b>swampbaby985</b> - the 06/06/2014 at 3:34am<b>pandass</b> - the 04/20/2014 at 1:08pm

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shadypalmtree's favorite FMLs

Today, my brother told my 3 year old son that cool kids call their parents by their real names. This wouldn't be half as bad if he hadn't also convinced my son that my real name was Satan. FML

#21247749
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38939) - you deserved it (3442)

On 08/29/2014 at 8:35am - kids - by Amithatevil - Japan (Kanagawa)

Today, I asked my dad to give me a haircut. After 20 minutes of "fuck"s and "shit"s, he gave up and just shaved my head bald. I pull off the look so badly that two people I don't even know have already told me I look like a psychopath. FML

#21245833
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33560) - you deserved it (5428)

On 08/26/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by alanh69 (man) - United States (Iowa)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50393) - you deserved it (9707)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, some random bloke introduced himself at a bar by asking to fuck me. I got tongue-tied trying to say both "fuck off" and "please go away". I ended up telling him to "Please fuck away." FML

#21242424
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37486) - you deserved it (6738)

On 08/21/2014 at 12:36pm - misc - by royallymessedup -

Today, I had some painful gas at work, so I tried to silently ease it out. It was silent all right; silent, and so deadly that someone exclaimed, "What the fuck?!" My coworkers traced it back to me. Now they're all pointing their mini desk fans in my direction to make a point. FML

#21241122
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37058) - you deserved it (10071)

On 08/19/2014 at 5:54pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, the man I have been in love with for years came to me with a beautiful ring and a heartfelt proposal. Too bad it ended with an eager, "So do you think he'll say yes?" FML

Today, I saw a bulge in my friend's pocket. I poked it and asked, "What'cha got there?" He said, "Uh, that's my dick, Mike." FML

#21235845
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38790) - you deserved it (23985)

On 08/12/2014 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by not a dick-man (man) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21536) - you deserved it (35502)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my blind date turned out to be my gynecologist. FML

#21229613
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47637) - you deserved it (3706)

On 08/04/2014 at 10:00pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I lost my wedding ring at work. It wouldn't be too hard to track down, except that I work at Heinz. If you find it in your mayonnaise, keep it. FML

Today, I was out with my boyfriend, when he started browsing wedding rings. He found a ring, proposed to me right there in front of a crowd, and then was promptly denied a payment plan. We left without a ring. FML

#21216427
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52919) - you deserved it (4875)

On 07/21/2014 at 3:31pm - love - by badluck - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was carrying my four-month-old son in a checkout line. An older couple behind us remarked that I would spoil my son if I carried him everywhere. My son responded by projectile vomiting all over the wife, then looked at me and giggled. FML

Today, I was browsing the People of Walmart site, chuckling at all the weirdos on there, when I came across a picture of my mom. FML

#21214404
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50394) - you deserved it (6779)

On 07/19/2014 at 6:38pm - misc - by Death By Parent (woman) - United States

Today, I was at the mall in the food court, when some guy asked for my number. I turned him down, but I was impressed with how ballsy he was. Without thinking, I said, "I like your balls!" Half the place instantly fell silent. FML

Today, on the bus, a little boy gave me the dirtiest look, pointed at my pregnant stomach, and menacingly said, "I know what you did." FML

#21205823
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50557) - you deserved it (6621)

On 07/11/2014 at 7:03am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)



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