shadowdragon0820

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shadowdragon0820

2Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 729
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

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shadowdragon0820's page activity

Visits<b>b5b0n36</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 8:10pm<b>Sayeret_Matkal</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 12:24am<b>LeonardoDiCrapio</b> - the 03/23/2016 at 4:19pm<b>MatthewK</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 2:03pm<b>WhyM3Th0ugh</b> - the 03/22/2016 at 1:42am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 8:12pm<b>Greatsoulme</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 6:42pm<b>serrentinoj</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 4:01pm<b>thelordofpies</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 3:26pm<b>JewMaster720</b> - the 03/21/2016 at 3:05pm<b>Miss_Whipped</b> - the 02/06/2016 at 8:56pm<b>MM100</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 11:57pm<b>yepthisisit</b> - the 12/17/2015 at 11:50pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 11/12/2015 at 8:35am<b>no0ne0890</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 3:24pm<b>ArcticDragon</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 12:59pm<b>maria95aa</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 12:40pm<b>toomanyidiots</b> - the 11/04/2015 at 9:48am

Fucked!<b>Miss_Whipped</b> - the 02/05/2016 at 5:46am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 10/27/2015 at 1:27pm

shadowdragon0820's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

See all of shadowdragon0820's badges

shadowdragon0820's favorite FMLs

Today, as I was cleaning up after my two year-old, I found a pair of lacy underwear in his toy box. Not only are they not mine, but now I have to ask my husband if he's cheating on me. Or ask my babysitter if she's being having fun, instead of actually babysitting. FML

by Whyme? / 04/27/2016 at 10:39pm / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was at a party. A guy kept looking at me, so I tried to strike up a conversation with him. I realized he was drunk when he slurred, "Ya know, you're the only girl I've met that's fat AND flat chested!" There goes my self-esteem. FML

by Anonymous / 04/19/2016 at 11:59am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, my new bunny decided she is only going to eat carrots. If I put anything else in her food bowl, she viciously attacks the bowl until all of the food has spilled out. FML

by an adorable devil / 03/21/2016 at 2:52am / United States (Texas) / Animals

Today, my girlfriend and I were getting hot and steamy in the shower, until I slipped and fell backwards into the shower curtain, which caused me to hit the back of my head on the toilet seat, and the bar of the shower curtain to land on my throat. FML

by Hotdamn / 03/21/2016 at 12:32am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, my daughter was scared to go to the bathroom because she thought there was a person behind the shower curtain. There actually was a person behind the shower curtain. FML

by kids / 05/12/2014 at 1:17am / Kids

Today, I got a new dentist. You know how most dentists play soft, relaxing music? Well this guy seems to like rap a lot, and it's kinda hard getting your teeth cleaned to the sound of bullets going off. FML

by randomusername99 / 05/05/2014 at 5:51pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, my 808 area code phone number has yet again been mistaken for a 1-800 number. I've been getting phone calls at three in the morning from people on the east coast who are trying to return their shoes. They want to speak to my supervisor because I "don't sound professional enough." FML

by orangemango / 04/22/2014 at 2:18am / United States (Hawaii) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was out with my girlfriend at a club. As a slow dance began, a guy approached and asked, "May I cut in?" My girlfriend surprised me by saying, "Sure!" As I was about to protest, the guy cut me off and said, "Sorry miss, I was asking him." FML

by Anonymous / 02/13/2014 at 8:31pm / United States / Love

Today, my husband received the "antique" samurai sword that he bought on Craigslist with $399.99 of our money. He only shared my outrage at the waste of money when he opened the package, only to find a toy sword along with a note saying, "HAHA, TROLLED." FML

by juliearis / 07/06/2013 at 3:45pm / United States (Connecticut) / Money

Today, my boyfriend and I had a threesome. He suggested we have another guy. It ended up devolving into a twosome, and I wasn't part of it. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 2:39am / Canada (Alberta) / Intimacy

Today, the extremely uncooperative client whom I'm trying to defend in court sent me a letter in which he threatened to sue me, because charging him for my services supposedly violates his "constipational rights". FML

by harrington61 / 05/19/2013 at 5:27pm / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I found out that my wife was having sex with my friend. It turned out that my genius cat realized it wasn't me there and attacked his balls, severely cutting them. I now have to kill my cat and pay for his medical bills to sew his balls back. FML

by Anonymous / 01/08/2011 at 8:11pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I found out that my friends were convinced that I was gay. I have known most of them for 3 plus years, they all thought my girlfriend was a special shopping partner. I found this out while announcing my engagement. FML

by Anonymous / 12/03/2009 at 3:23am / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous

Today, I finally told my mom I am a lesbian. She started laughing and said 'Good one honey'. I told her I wasn't joking, and she took my face in her hands and said 'You ARE joking!' Then she left. FML

by Anonymous / 08/12/2009 at 12:44am / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy

Today, my adorable five and a half year old boy told me that when he grows up he's going to be my boyfriend. I thought it was kinda cute until I asked him why. "Because you need one." FML

by Anonymous / 06/10/2009 at 9:12am / United States (Maine) / Kids