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sexyboi1985

Offline (the 07/04/2014 at 4:05pm) | Search for a member

sexyboi1985

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 629
  • Number of comments : 132
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 8 posted

About sexyboi1985 : I am from Sydney, Australia.
Love reading FMLs for a laugh and love making friends.
MSG me if u wanna know more.

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sexyboi1985's favorite FMLs

Today, I was prepping for an interview after several months of unemployment. I had just finished brushing my teeth when I reached back and grabbed a towel behind me to wipe my face. Turns out it wasn't a towel, it was my newly dry-cleaned suit jacket that my wife had put there for me. FML

#21217564
43 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23384) - you deserved it (6402)

On 07/22/2014 at 5:55pm - work - by Infadel - United States (California)

Today, I found out that my cat, that I've had for 3 years, is actually my neighbor's missing cat. FML

#21212155
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44485) - you deserved it (5627)

On 07/17/2014 at 7:32pm - animals - by kittynapper - United States (Colorado)

Today, I taught my 23-year-old boyfriend how to correctly brush his teeth. FML

#21209921
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37007) - you deserved it (5653)

On 07/15/2014 at 5:24pm - health - by stinky breath - United States (California)

Today, I nearly had an anxiety attack trying to sneak up on my sister to silly-string her. FML

#21205230
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30051) - you deserved it (11611)

On 07/10/2014 at 5:28pm - misc - by cassieono - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I had this really high fever and my sister decides I'm hot enough to fry an egg on. So I'm lying in bed now, still terribly feverish but smelling of the egg she cracked on my back. FML

#21202148
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35725) - you deserved it (3146)

On 07/07/2014 at 9:41pm - health - by egged - Singapore

Today, my teenage daughter faked a suicide because I bought her a Samsung instead of an iPhone for her birthday. FML

#21198840
325 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53146) - you deserved it (10953)

On 07/04/2014 at 8:15pm - kids - by iphonerevolution - South Africa

Today, my towel was stolen at the swimming pool. I quickly found the culprit, and to avoid a conflict, I just swiped it back when he wasn't looking. I felt pretty good about everything, until I got back home and realized it wasn't actually my towel after all. FML

#21193691
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25469) - you deserved it (37609)

On 06/30/2014 at 12:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to a seamstress to be fitted for my wedding dress and left with a pierced nipple. FML

#21187386
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44546) - you deserved it (5553)

On 06/25/2014 at 12:29am - misc - by pierced. - United States (Nevada)

Today, I lost my dog while hiking. After searching the trails for an hour and a half, he was by the car. FML

Today, I looked at my bank balance. It read $1.23. That's higher than it usually is. FML

#21185584
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39898) - you deserved it (7707)

On 06/23/2014 at 5:26pm - money - by amused (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was feeling frisky and asked my boyfriend if he wanted a blowjob. He said "Fuck no", then rolled over to go to sleep. FML

#21182128
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46314) - you deserved it (8075)

On 06/20/2014 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, at my first day working at Walmart, a customer asked if we have any egg cookers. I said I wasn't sure, but that I'd be "eggstatic" to go ask for him. The first clue I got to suggest he hated puns was him yelling "Don't get smart with me, boy!" and then threatening to kill me. FML

#21180841
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40821) - you deserved it (9209)

On 06/19/2014 at 4:10pm - work - by fuckmyjob (man) - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I went to spend my last $50 on gas, since I get paid in 5 days. I paid for the gas and stepped into the restroom briefly. I came out, only to discover that the attendant had put the gas on the wrong pump, and someone had used it for themselves. My tank is empty. FML

Today, my husband reorganized our fridge for the World Cup. He cleared everything out and filled it with beer and chips. FML

#21171761
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41278) - you deserved it (9942) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 06/12/2014 at 1:02am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Missouri)



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