About sexxme : i'm sierra.
About sexxme : i'm sierra.
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sexxme's favorite FMLs
by lolilovemyboyfriend / 10/19/2011 at 10:37am / United States (North Carolina) / Intimacy
by Nickname / 10/12/2011 at 4:05pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I wore my brand new Wonderbra to school. When I got home, my dad looked at me and started laughing hysterically. Between breaths, he asked if anyone actually thought my chest was that big and said "You know why it's called a Wonderbra? Guys take it off and wonder where your tits went." FML
by Anonymous / 10/10/2011 at 6:26pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous
Today, my sister asked me to explain where to put a tampon. I realized near the end of the conversation that she believed the urine, feces, and blood all came from the same orifice. This began a long discussion during which I was forced to tell her not to put the tampon in her rectum. FML
by ohgawd / 10/08/2011 at 2:48am / United States (Washington) / Health
by Anonymous / 10/04/2011 at 12:03pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Animals
Today, my wife got so upset I didn't hold her while Snooki from Jersey Shore was crying, that after the episode was done she locked herself in our room crying. Now I have to sleep on the floor of my living room. Thanks Snooki. FML
by drastech99 / 09/23/2011 at 2:22am / United States (California) / Love
by Anonymous / 09/19/2011 at 10:39am / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, I was browsing the web when I checked the search history. Turns out my son has been searching for "nude grills" and "hot grills." Not only is my 12-year-old son attempting to find porn on the internet, he also can't spell. FML
by Nickname / 07/27/2011 at 10:02pm / United States (Kansas) / Intimacy
Today, my parents think that I don't realize all the sexual euphemisms in their conversations. One of the more recent ones being made by my dad at the dinner table: "This sausage is great, honey, but mine is bigger and tastier!" FML
by wittlegirl / 07/13/2011 at 2:16pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, my girlfriend, who is very self conscious about her body, finally decided to have sex with me. She told me to wait a few minutes, so I did. I stripped and turned around to find her in a one-piece swimsuit, with a hole cut out of the crotch. FML
by Anonymous / 07/13/2011 at 1:02am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
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- Today, I had to work a double shift as a server with a multi-fractured foot because my boss decided… Today, I found out my hours at work were getting cut and given to another employee. Not only are my… Today, one of my coworkers was told to empty the clothes dryer and put in more tea towels. I know…
- Today, my mom had to go to one of her relatives’ funeral. She came to borrow a black scarf from me,… Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my… Today, I’m a French teacher abroad, and as my beard has a huge hole near my chin, my students call…