seximexi911

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seximexi911

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Monday 11 September 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5119
  • Number of comments : 137
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 7 posted

About seximexi911 : hmm names mayra, im 22 and live in atlanta. im extremely chill and easy to get along with. i love to meet new people and go out and have fun just living my life. I love music and photography, but my beautiful daughter and my fiancé are my life. :)


"And the road to life, yes it goes up and down, doesn't really matter as long as the music goes on."
-Slightly Stoopid

seximexi911's page activity

Visits<b>redstone7693</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 7:32pm<b>DuncanHills</b> - the 11/02/2015 at 8:20am<b>MassiDelta</b> - the 07/17/2015 at 3:50pm<b>depressed_child</b> - the 05/19/2015 at 6:59am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 5:46pm<b>MrAwesomenezz</b> - the 12/29/2014 at 3:17pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 05/13/2014 at 9:21pm<b>xivoricbutterfly</b> - the 03/12/2014 at 2:23am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 01/04/2014 at 1:32pm<b>hyates89</b> - the 11/17/2013 at 4:47pm<b>alltimelow785</b> - the 09/05/2013 at 10:37pm<b>ohishkabibble</b> - the 05/06/2013 at 10:08am<b>bullshittery</b> - the 02/29/2012 at 12:00pm<b>jacdan8502</b> - the 01/12/2012 at 4:18pm<b>Alecksander</b> - the 12/03/2011 at 10:28pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 12/03/2011 at 3:00am<b>strength413</b> - the 11/09/2011 at 10:15am<b>biggee531</b> - the 10/11/2011 at 7:02am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 05/16/2015 at 11:46pm

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seximexi911's favorite FMLs

Today, I was at the beach with my parents. They were walking hand in hand, when they spotted a crab. My Dad turned to my Mum and said "Oh, must've crawled out of my pubes!" they both laughed and kissed. I don't think they realized I was within hearing distance. FML

by Anonymous / 10/02/2010 at 9:12am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to cancel my wedding because my fiancé is so hungover from his bachelor party, he's throwing up all over the place, can't stand up straight and is calling me by the stripper's name he met yesterday night. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2010 at 5:45am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, in an attempt to spice up our relationship, I tied my boyfriend up and did a strip tease for him. I pulled my skirt down over my heels and tripped as I tried to step out of it. Not only did I pull a muscle in my leg but I elbowed him in the groin. So much for spice. FML

by Anonymous / 10/01/2010 at 1:43am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy

Today, I was given new meds, and apparently my body doesn't understand the difference between "may cause stomach upset" and "you will crap yourself as you have an orgasm while having sex with your boyfriend." FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2010 at 9:25am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy

Today, I was in the bathroom stall when a man made eye-contact with me through the cracks. I quickly looked away, and about a minute later I looked back to see if he was gone. He was still there and was actually trying to keep making eye-contact with me while I pooped. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2010 at 11:00pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, after waiting all day to get into my favorite band's concert, I got front row. At the end, one of them grabbed my CD and got the whole band to sign it. The last band member tossed it into the crowd, nowhere near me. FML

by lovedontlivehere / 09/23/2010 at 7:49pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I went to my parents' place to visit. My ex-boyfriend's photo is on the fridge, but there aren't any photos of my husband or any of our wedding photos. FML

by annoyed / 09/23/2010 at 5:59am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found my favorite stuffed animal I had as a child in the trash bin. I took it out to find that it felt wet and smelt funny. Apparently, my younger brother cut a hole in the butt of it and used it to masturbate. FML

by Anonymous / 09/21/2010 at 6:07pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, I ran over my neighbors' cat. I didn't want it to look like I killed it, so I put it under my other neighbor's car so it would look like they ran over it. The cat's owners were watching me. FML

by awesome / 09/21/2010 at 12:49am / United States (Arizona) / Animals

Today, I ate what was supposed to be a delicious mini powdered donut. The first one tasted funny, so I pulled out another one and realized that the powdered sugar was now in fact powdered hairy mold. Then I looked at the package and realized it was over a year and a half old. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2010 at 4:28am / United States (California) / Health

Today, I came home to find my drunken father sitting on our front lawn. He had a blanket, lit candle, and was singing with his eyes closed. He told me he believed he was Buddha from watching the history channel. Meanwhile, cars were driving by our house beeping, and yelling "praise the lord!" FML

by embaressed / 09/19/2010 at 10:13pm / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was riding in the backseat while my mom was driving. Noticing she was driving way over the speed limit, I opened a police siren app on my iPod to make her slow down. When she realized, she pulled over, kicked me out of the car and made me walk home. FML

by whitefox123 / 09/19/2010 at 8:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Transportation

Today, a crying kid was brought to my attention by a customer. He was so upset from losing his mom that he couldn't say his name or his moms name. I took him around the store asking him to point out his mom. Once we found her she told me "I was hiding from my kid to test his independence." FML

by Anonymous / 09/19/2010 at 12:27am / Canada (Quebec) / Work

Today, after lunch with my frail, disabled, 87-year-old father, I reached into my purse for lipstick. I didn't recognize the cute cylinder I pulled out, but thinking it was a flashlight, I pressed the little button, spraying my dad and myself in the face with pepper spray. FML

by Anonymous / 09/18/2010 at 9:57pm / United States (Nebraska) / Miscellaneous

Today, I bought a new pack of "feminine wipes" on my way over to my boyfriend's house after a long day of work. He saw them in my purse and sweetly told me I shouldn't be so self conscious. Later on, when he was going down on me, he said, "I take back what I said earlier." FML

by anonymous / 09/18/2010 at 8:15pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy