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Offline (the 01/07/2015 at 4:19am)

sex_and_drugs

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 10 June 1998 (17 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1424
  • Number of comments : 26
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

About sex_and_drugs : Hey I'm pretty awkward and don't kno what to say in these things...

sex_and_drugs's page activity

Visits<b>saidoh</b> - the 02/18/2016 at 1:58am<b>trashyant</b> - the 02/02/2016 at 10:05pm<b>marmaries</b> - the 10/22/2015 at 10:39am<b>ThatSlappinBass</b> - the 02/26/2015 at 8:13am<b>iMuffindrops</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 10:50pm<b>CamBen</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 4:48am<b>jerryj</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 11:18am<b>gsaturnglow</b> - the 01/23/2014 at 7:10pm<b>killmenow03</b> - the 01/11/2014 at 4:02pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 01/07/2014 at 12:13pm

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I agree, their lives suck

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You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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sex_and_drugs's favorite FMLs

Today, I caught my boyfriend secretly using my hair straightener while I was in the other room. Too embarrassed to talk to him about it, I left and came back later, only to discover him slipping on a pair of my panties. FML

by WTF? / 04/01/2011 at 11:55am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

by failureparent / 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm / United States (California) / Geek

Today, my girlfriend told me she was bored. During sex. FML

by Anonymous / 02/16/2011 at 10:47am / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I realized that I'll have to explain to my child that mommy and daddy met on World of Warcraft. FML

by Anonymous / 12/29/2010 at 12:20am / United States (California) / Kids

Today, while at my mom's birthday dinner, I started to pretend to drum with one hand, using my left leg as the drums. Everybody stared at me and started to yell. Now they all think I was masturbating. FML

by Anonymous / 12/05/2010 at 12:09am / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I was having the most wonderful bath. The water was steaming, the bubbles were bubbly, and I was reading a really good book. I put my book down to yawn and looked to my right. My gaze was met by the lovely face of my brother's pet tarantula. FML

by mzgabbster / 10/24/2010 at 8:21am / United States (Utah) / Animals

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

by gorillalove / 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

by dom / 09/08/2010 at 2:53am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I came home to my wife crying. She had mixed up our newborn twin girls and couldn't tell which was which. I looked at the girls. Neither could I. FML

by uselessdad / 09/07/2010 at 7:48pm / Singapore / Kids

Today, I kissed my girlfriend. She threw up in my mouth. FML

by Anonymous / 08/16/2010 at 4:20pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Love

Today, I turned the shower on the hottest setting so it would warm up quickly. I started to sing and dance around the bathroom. I got too carried away and pelvic thrusted the water, which I hadn't turned back down. FML

by Fire_Crotch / 08/14/2010 at 2:27am / Canada (British Columbia) / Health

Today, I was looking through my boyfriends phone, when I found a naked picture of myself. Too bad I haven't sent him any. Ever. FML

by Sunshine.0.ninja / 07/29/2010 at 2:28pm / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, my wife changed her facebook status from "married" to "widowed". I'm scared. FML

by Anonymous / 06/02/2010 at 2:17pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, I went to the shops with my little sister. We had to walk through the lingerie section of the store to get to another part. My sister then yells at the top of her voice 'stop following me you freak'. I had security escort me out of the store, and got many dirty looks. She thought it was hilarious. FML

by Timv86 / 02/16/2010 at 3:18am / Australia (Victoria) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried convincing my Valentine-hating boyfriend to send me a card, by explaining how important it is to me. He finally agreed and sent me a card. I opened it up, and it wished me 'harmony and well-being on Lupercalia'. What is Lupercalia? It's an ancient Roman festival where men run down the street naked, whipping people with goat skins to encourage fertility. FML

by CrappyValentine / 02/14/2010 at 1:56pm / Netherlands (Noord-Holland) / Love