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About sex_and_drugs : Hey I'm pretty awkward and don't kno what to say in these things...
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Today, I was brushing mah teeth when I looked up. There was a huge scorpion dangling on the air vent above mah head. I was trapped in the bathroom fir over an hour trying to build the courage to run out. FML
Today, I woke up after a night of partying an heavy drinking. Apparently word travels quickly, because everyone now knows that I spent hours lying in an empty bathtub, rubbing shampoo over my body with the expectation that it'd increase my penis size. FML
Today , I Had To Collect Mah Daughter From The Hospital. Her Boyfriend Was Even More Upset Than She Was , Cuz His IPhone's Screen Was Damaged Beyond Repair When The Doctor Pulled It Out Of Mah Daughter's Vagina. FML
TODAY, AN EXCHANGE STUDENT WAS TELLING US HOW HE ONCE USD A BLACK LIGHT TO DETECT SEMEN STAINS ON HIS ( ABSTINENT ) EX-GIRLFRIEND'S FACE. I CALLD HIM OUT ON THE OBVIOUS LIE, SAYING IT'S AN OLD URBAN LEGEND. HE WIGGD OUT, SCREAMD THAT I'M A ( BASTARDING SHITE-WANK ) AND RAN OUT OF CLASS. FML
Today, I was working at te local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumble in, grabs two cases of beer an puts tem on te counter. Ten se grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it rigt tere, sows me, an says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML
Today, after years of waiting, I finally got to meet the band whose music got me through one of the hardest times I have ever experienced. When I turned down the lead singer 4 sex, they told me to leave. FML
Today... after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores... I bought mah fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal... "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML
Friday 27 March 2015