serenity40

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Offline (the 11/19/2015 at 4:18pm)

serenity40

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 711
  • Number of comments : 72
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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serenity40's page activity

Visits<b>PyramidKingMC</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 7:27am<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 02/04/2016 at 5:14pm<b>Roozb</b> - the 12/15/2015 at 5:10pm<b>pumpkinlamps</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 1:49am<b>schindler12345</b> - the 01/21/2015 at 12:39am<b>j_mitchell25</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 2:36pm<b>worldclassrager</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 4:00pm<b>wondercat40</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 3:09pm<b>SteakfryOne</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 9:51pm<b>eatdaussy69lol</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 5:53pm<b>DucHung</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 11:24am<b>Imacutiez</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 5:59pm<b>Leucippus</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 4:14pm<b>Kirito_Kazuto</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 12:54pm<b>Ilmoran</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 12:45pm<b>MrDonSalvetti</b> - the 04/19/2014 at 8:05am<b>poncho55</b> - the 10/22/2013 at 4:08am<b>Iknoweverything</b> - the 05/31/2013 at 3:29pm

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serenity40's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a Halloween party dressed in Charlie Brown's ghost costume, a white sheet with holes all over. I got beat up for dressing like a member of the KKK. FML

by Halloween Fail / 10/31/2014 at 11:59pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend found out about my severe phobia of moths. It's so bad that I sometimes pass out. He caught a moth in a jar, and put it on my bedside table. I woke up, saw it, and had a panic attack. He recorded it all and wants to upload it to YouTube. FML

by Anonymous / 03/15/2013 at 2:05pm / United States / Health

Today, after applying for a job at a tanning salon, I was told they don't hire "naturally tan" people. I'm black. FML

by Anonymous / 01/21/2013 at 7:48am / United States (Maryland) / Work

Today, while sharing a few beers on the couch with my boyfriend, he drunkenly uttered the fateful words, "Babe, if I could suck my own dick, you'd be single as HELL." FML

by well, i am now / 12/27/2012 at 7:24pm / United States / Intimacy

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

by ayye_its_nikki / 12/19/2012 at 12:07am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend grabbed my boob, shook it savagely, and shouted "Earthquake!" FML

by Ape / 12/17/2012 at 6:12pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, during a conversation, my boss said, "What, what?" Before I could stop myself, I replied, "In the butt." FML

by whitecollar / 12/04/2012 at 9:43pm / United Kingdom (York) / Work

Today, my dad grounded me for two weeks for profusely swearing at my misbehaving laptop. After some arguing, he actually accepted my half-joking offer to play a game of CoD over it. His condition was that if I lost, my grounding period would double. We played. He kicked my ass. FML

by goodbye cruel world / 11/30/2012 at 8:28pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I asked my manager if wearing makeup was a requirement for the job. She told me, "Not if you're naturally pretty... So for you, yes". FML

by satega / 11/17/2012 at 4:15am / United States (Missouri) / Work

Today, I sat on my balls while at a restaurant. As I was wincing in pain and readjusting myself, my girlfriend came and sat on my lap. She landed directly on my nuts. After a minute or two, I stood up, only to rack myself once again on the corner of the table. FML

Today, I started dating a seemingly normal guy. Not even four hours into our relationship, he began telling me that he can see spirits, dead people, and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go. FML

by holyshitbatman / 11/08/2012 at 11:53pm / United States (Ohio) / Love

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

by thebeachisthatway / 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Kids

Today, I tried to tell my best friend how wrong she is to be dating a married man, whose wife happens to be pregnant with their first child. Our talk ended with her calling me a "meddling, frigid bitch" and me being told this is why I can't get laid. FML

Today, I bought professional hair clippers to shave down below, thinking it would be safer than using a razor. Let's just say the bathroom now looks like a murder scene, and it's going to be a while before I have sex again. FML

by Anonymous / 10/20/2012 at 12:03am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy