About serene_mayhem : I like singing, writing music, playing guitar, assisting in special ed classes, photography and writing stories
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I agree, their lives suck
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serene_mayhem's favorite FMLs
by ANON / 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML
by benjo / 08/06/2013 at 2:07pm / United States / Kids
Today, the window cleaner did his rounds at my house. I sat at my mirror applying makeup and doing my hair. When he came to my window, he yelled rather loudly, "Stop putting on a show for me, you dirty slut!" FML
by stillembarrassed / 08/06/2013 at 1:01pm / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous
by needsnewshorts / 07/15/2013 at 9:42pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
by heallven / 01/31/2013 at 7:26am / Miscellaneous
Today, as every day for the past few weeks, my husband won't have sex. His reason? We've decided to have a baby, and he reckons that the longer he waits, the more competition there will be between his sperm and thus the better the result will be. FML
Today, my girlfriend has a new obsession: grabbing my junk and whispering in my ear the song, "Baby, Imma Be Your Motivation." Problem? I get an instant boner and she only does it in public, because it's "funny as hell." FML
by InstantHardOn / 11/07/2011 at 11:43pm / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 06/10/2009 at 9:12am / United States (Maine) / Kids
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- Today, I decided to fake it when my husband and I were making love. Afterwards, he told me that he… Today, as usual, my boyfriend referred to his penis in the third person as "Mr. Willy". Even during… Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought…