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sea0863

Offline (the 10/01/2014 at 6:37am) | Search for a member

sea0863

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  • Number of visits : 1620
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sea0863's favorite FMLs

Today, it's my three month anniversary with my girlfriend and so I decided to bake her a cake from scratch. It took me three hours, a call to my mom, three different recipe books, and half my pantry. On the way to her house, I stopped to pick up flowers and left the cake in the car. It melted. FML

#16081826
218 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35985) - you deserved it (10128)

On 05/07/2011 at 7:10pm - love - by sadman (man) - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

#16081373
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37205) - you deserved it (11909)

On 05/07/2011 at 6:27pm - misc - by Mel (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, the tree that my neighbors have neglected to cut down fell on my car. They claim that by law, they aren't responsible and don't have to pay for it. FML

#16003860
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33462) - you deserved it (2970)

On 05/01/2011 at 12:31pm - money - by me - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got pulled by a cop because I forgot to put my registration sticker on. I get nervous around authority and have nervous shakes. I ripped the registration sticker 3 times trying to put it on. The cop then gave me a ticket for "Improper Equipment". FML

#15986452
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25753) - you deserved it (6374)

On 04/30/2011 at 2:13am - misc - by Cody - United States

Today, I used my hair straightener to attempt to straighten my eyelashes and burned my eyelid. I don't know what's sadder, that fact I thought it would be fun, or that I was stupid enough to think I wouldn't hurt myself. FML

#15753750
384 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10673) - you deserved it (124717)

On 04/12/2011 at 10:01am - health - by sadcase - Australia

Today, I was in the emergency room. The doctor told me that my injuries and back problems are the intensity of those after a car accident. I slipped on a grape. FML

#15691583
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35281) - you deserved it (4939)

On 04/08/2011 at 6:35am - health - by ridella -

Today, while at the beach, my little sister thought it would be cute to feed a small seagull some of her food. Minutes later a flock of seagulls swarmed and attacked me and my sandwich. FML

#15683687
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23503) - you deserved it (3615)

On 04/07/2011 at 7:28pm - misc - by ihateseagulls (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was at a local talent show and during a piano performance I had to go to the bathroom. I sang along in the bathroom but was unaware how loud I was until I walked out and everyone started applauding me while the pianist was still playing. FML

#15661071
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9574) - you deserved it (32777)

On 04/06/2011 at 2:19am - misc - by American idol -

Today, while bending over to get the brownies I was making out of the oven, my husband slapped my butt. I fell into the oven. FML

#15619603
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72539) - you deserved it (5880)

On 04/03/2011 at 11:14am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went with my beautiful fiancée to tell her Grandmother, who's a bit senile, that we were engaged. Her response: "I know he's very nice, but think about the chubby little ugly children he'll give you". This was followed by a recollection of her ex-boyfriends who would've fathered attractive kids. FML

#15616826
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30648) - you deserved it (2815)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:33am - misc - by Joe (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I went with my beautiful fiancée to tell her Grandmother, who's a bit senile, that we were engaged. Her response: "I know he's very nice, but think about the chubby little ugly children he'll give you". This was followed by a recollection of her ex-boyfriends who would've fathered attractive kids. FML

#15616826
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30648) - you deserved it (2815)

On 04/03/2011 at 3:33am - misc - by Joe (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my friend called me at work to tell me that someone had hit my motorcycle and that it was in pretty bad shape. I chuckled and waited for the "April fools" that would follow. A picture of my wrecked bike came instead. FML

#15589455
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34689) - you deserved it (3357)

On 04/01/2011 at 1:50pm - misc - by Username - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was trying to replace the lightbulb in my bedroom. Since I couldn't reach it by myself, I grabbed and stood on a chair. After I got two broken bones, and had stitches in my forehead, I figured that using a chair with wheels probably wasn't the best idea after all. FML

#15581627
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9242) - you deserved it (68441)

On 03/31/2011 at 10:23pm - misc - by owies :( - United States (Florida)

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

#15580957
152 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32131) - you deserved it (6498)

On 03/31/2011 at 9:46pm - health - by Amy - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friends sat me down and said they were concerned I was self-harming. I don't self-harm, I'm just a massive klutz. They don't believe me, and want me to get professional help. And now, because I found it all so funny, they think I'm mentally unhinged. FML

#15560826
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28770) - you deserved it (4224)

On 03/30/2011 at 1:28pm - misc - by Alisha (woman) - United Kingdom (Stirling)



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