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sea0863

Offline (the 09/06/2014 at 2:02pm) | Search for a member

sea0863

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  • Number of visits : 1584
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sea0863's favorite FMLs

Today, my friends and I ran through a flock of resting seagulls. The birds took to the skies and chased after us, covering us in shit. FML

#17773363
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7984) - you deserved it (45163)

On 09/18/2011 at 4:17pm - animals - by shithead (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my five year old ran down the street wearing nothing but flip flops, Star Wars underwear, and a baseball helmet. He was swinging a badminton racket while screaming "THIS IS SPARTA!" My neighbors watched laughing as I had to run after him down the street in my pajamas. FML

#17767423
29 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29471) - you deserved it (8241)

On 09/17/2011 at 9:20pm - kids - by awesomekidsmum - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, I found a used condom in the fax machine. I'm the electrical maintenance repair for the company. I have to untangle it from the belts. FML

#17757588
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25899) - you deserved it (1706)

On 09/16/2011 at 12:20pm - work - by Help - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I realized too late that a picture in my school Powerpoint presentation of thousands of New Zealand sheep, was actually a picture of thousands of naked men in a field. FML

#17709255
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15101) - you deserved it (31274)

On 09/10/2011 at 3:11am - misc - by FullOfNick (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mom baked cupcakes for my visiting grandparents. Later, I saw my grandpa chowing down on them. Even later, my mom demanded to know why there were a dozen cupcake wrappers on my bed. I've essentially been framed by my own grandpa, and am now grounded for a month. FML

#17707171
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30486) - you deserved it (2412)

On 09/09/2011 at 9:57pm - kids - by why?! (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34275) - you deserved it (6050) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34275) - you deserved it (6050) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I went to Walmart with my Dad, and he decided to kick me in the butt while I was walking. When I went to kick him back, I hit my own leg out from beneath myself and landed on my face. The most embarrassing thing was that the people who saw all started clapping. FML

#17701196
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20256) - you deserved it (11964)

On 09/09/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Krystyn Gareau - Canada (Saskatchewan)

Today, a five year old that I am babysitting picked up a knife and said he would chop my nuts off if I didn't give him his ice cream before dinner. Only 5 more hours to go. FML

#17672212
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28990) - you deserved it (2994)

On 09/05/2011 at 4:23pm - kids - by thatoneguy - United States (Texas)

Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML

#17661211
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32192) - you deserved it (2669)

On 09/04/2011 at 12:42pm - work - by -- - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I have been released from jail because my idiot friends decided to get me a surprise hooker for my birthday. Turns out "Candy" was actually an undercover cop. My friends ditched me. I was the only one arrested. FML

Today, I was at a music festival, watching one of my favorite bands. The security guys were throwing water into the crowd to cool us down. I saw some about to be thrown by another fan, so I stood with my mouth open to catch some of it. I ended up with a face full of hot piss. FML

#17643298
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28833) - you deserved it (18149)

On 09/02/2011 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I was at a music festival, watching one of my favorite bands. The security guys were throwing water into the crowd to cool us down. I saw some about to be thrown by another fan, so I stood with my mouth open to catch some of it. I ended up with a face full of hot piss. FML

#17643298
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28833) - you deserved it (18149)

On 09/02/2011 at 9:45am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML

#17628781
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31398) - you deserved it (2997)

On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)

Today, I visited my son at work. He's an interpreter for the government. As I watched him converse with a group of men, I was overcome with pride. Then the woman next to me said "I can't believe they're talking about that in public." They were discussing masturbation techniques. FML

#17625902
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30809) - you deserved it (3369)

On 08/30/2011 at 11:30pm - intimacy - by mystupidson (woman) - United States (Colorado)



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