About sdsunjay : FML. none of my fml stories upload. They either get rejected or I get an error.
fml. seriously
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50 favourites
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Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified: me or him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (29506) - you deserved it (2878)
Today, I received the photos my friend took of me proposing to my girlfriend. I'd proposed at the place we'd first met: the local zoo. When I looked them over, I noticed there was an elephant taking a poop in the background. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17242) - you deserved it (2807)
On 06/15/2012 at 1:12pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18397) - you deserved it (10962)
On 06/13/2012 at 5:30pm - intimacy - by Steve (man) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I told my parents that I wanted to donate blood. My dad helpfully interjected, "Sorry, they don't accept blood from gingers." FML
I agree, your life sucks (23791) - you deserved it (6024)
On 01/01/2012 at 8:22pm - health - by GingerJ (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, my house got broken into. Thankfully they didn't steal anything. They did, however, move things around into strange places and mess up my underwear. I have severe OCD, so this is probably worse than if they had taken everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20953) - you deserved it (2818)
On 08/22/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by WTFwhywouldyoudothat - United Kingdom (Rotherham)
Today, my toilet decided it wouldn't take any more shit from me, and flooded the bathroom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30691) - you deserved it (4683)
On 05/22/2011 at 4:31pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I accidentally set my hair on fire while lighting a cigarette. I panicked and put it out by slapping myself in the face. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7070) - you deserved it (41801)
On 05/02/2011 at 5:33am - misc - by Burnt (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend and I were playfully arguing about who loved the other more. After about a minute of this, my girlfriend walked over and kicked me in the crotch as hard as she could. She then said, "There, now you don't love me as much. I win." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39339) - you deserved it (12262)
On 03/28/2011 at 11:33pm - love - by ouch - United States (Arizona)
Today, I got a call from my 8 year old son's teacher. Apparently, my kid has been charging girls a quarter to touch his "special area." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41735) - you deserved it (6420)
Today, I was going down on my girlfriend. I thought everything was going well, then all of a sudden she gets up and screams at me "IT'S NOT A TACO EATING COMPETITION, CHILL OUT." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17804) - you deserved it (36498)
On 02/23/2011 at 5:06am - intimacy - by failed (man) - Switzerland (Vaud)
Today, I was getting it on with my boyfriend. I started to come, screaming, "Ah... ah... ah... AHH!" To which he added, "Staying alive! Staying alive!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (24753) - you deserved it (15686) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins
Today, I got my sister to pluck my eyebrows. She shaped them wrong, so now I look constantly sad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14165) - you deserved it (18821)
On 07/13/2010 at 11:02am - misc - by OhNo - United Kingdom (Sheffield)
Today, my math teacher told me to learn how to say "welcome to wal-mart". FML
I agree, your life sucks (29282) - you deserved it (8097)
On 06/18/2010 at 3:13am - work - by Stevo - United States (Washington)
Today, I started to type up a mass text to tell a decent amount of my friends that I'd just come home to a surprise from my boyfriend. Trying to fix a typo, I accidentally hit send with the text only saying "Guess what?! I just came." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18361) - you deserved it (7815)
On 03/14/2010 at 10:49am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, when I went to see a movie with my best friend, and there were 3 girls loudly discussing blow job techniques. I texted my boyfriend about how gross the conversation was. His reply was "Pay attention. You might learn something." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8547) - you deserved it (16952)
On 03/10/2010 at 6:05am - intimacy - by ohno - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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