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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 9 January 1989 (26 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2543
  • Number of comments : 482
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 9 posted

About sdroze1389 : I need adult friends but I may have come to the wrong place. I'm a total fucking weirdo. I'm a hybrid of a lonley cat lady and a self proclaimed intellectual, not the pompous kind mind you. I waste most of my time reading, writing, or trying to make people feel socially uncomfortable to gauge reactions in their body language. since I like food I also like to cook, I also like porn, but never together. unless I'm looking at food porn, you know those awesome coupons that come in the mail right when you're really broke and hungry at the same time. I also tend to be an alcoholic, not because I want to but more so because I need to. I've been miserably single for years by choice because I really don't like being close to people. I still like acquaintances though so msg me or get at me in the kik I have but never use. sd1389 don't smoke crack, unless you want to I guess but it doesn't seem worth it. what do I know though?

sdroze1389's page activity

Visits<b>C00kiesNcream</b> - 1 minute ago<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - 22 hours ago<b>kmaheynoway</b> - 24 hours ago<b>zanoty</b> - 24 hours ago<b>sarah5745</b> - 24 hours ago<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - yesterday at 5:09am<b>besosforme</b> - yesterday at 11:39pm<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - yesterday at 9:26pm<b>lumene</b> - yesterday at 8:45pm<b>Nadron</b> - yesterday at 8:44pm<b>TheCutestLizard</b> - yesterday at 7:56pm<b>IndicaPaincakes</b> - yesterday at 7:38pm<b>emeraldisle</b> - yesterday at 7:24pm<b>lyricalservant</b> - yesterday at 6:46pm<b>irisr</b> - the 05/26/2015 at 11:41am<b>alyssaamarante</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 11:12pm<b>Ashd09</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 9:38pm<b>Smeedz</b> - the 05/25/2015 at 8:08pm

Fucked!<b>sarah5745</b> - 24 hours ago<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - yesterday at 11:09am<b>graceinsheepwear</b> - yesterday at 3:27am<b>kmaheynoway</b> - yesterday at 2:20am<b>ChoolyBooly</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 3:50pm<b>SlowDownImaNoob</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 2:32pm<b>dzhonatan</b> - the 05/23/2015 at 1:43am<b>skye147</b> - the 05/14/2015 at 8:33pm<b>random_funnygirl</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 7:17am<b>Emi1y</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 9:34pm<b>FearlessDefender</b> - the 05/07/2015 at 6:13am<b>the_aspect</b> - the 05/01/2015 at 11:41am<b>dakotadavisbruh</b> - the 04/28/2015 at 5:02am<b>Kataclysm97</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 12:54am<b>SteamyPenguin</b> - the 04/24/2015 at 6:10pm<b>sturschaedel</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 5:05pm<b>Miss_Klutzie</b> - the 04/23/2015 at 3:53pm<b>annarcheer</b> - the 04/21/2015 at 11:02pm

sdroze1389's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!


You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

See all of sdroze1389's badges

sdroze1389's favorite FMLs

Today, I had one more gift to buy: a copy of Fight Club. I asked a person working at Best Buy if they had any in stock. The man wouldn't sell me the last copy because I had broken the first two rules. FML


I agree, your life sucks (26987) - you deserved it (11881)

On 12/24/2009 at 3:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I was awakened from a peaceful sleep by my crazy ex-girlfriend, who apparently copied my key before our break up three months ago. She was on top of me, stroking my beard, whispering: “He looks like Jesus.” FML


I agree, your life sucks (40237) - you deserved it (3188)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:47am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was about to propose. I got on my knee in front of my girlfriend and opened the box. My friend thought it would be funny to replace the ring with a condom. FML


I agree, your life sucks (44380) - you deserved it (4030)

On 12/20/2009 at 3:14am - love - by Catholicguy (man) - United States (California)

Today, I told my girlfriend of eight months that if she didn't start taking my band's music seriously, we couldn't see each other anymore. She said fine, and I hugged her, but then she stood up and said 'I hope we can still be friends,' and walked out the door. FML


I agree, your life sucks (8959) - you deserved it (64923)

On 10/20/2009 at 2:51am - love - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I woke up to see my cat crawling out my window onto the roof. Afraid he was going to jump to the ground, I crawled out my window as well. I caught him. The neighbors caught me in my underwear and bra yelling at my cat on the roof. FML


I agree, your life sucks (12129) - you deserved it (21083)

On 10/12/2009 at 9:44pm - animals - by catgirl911 (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was looking at my wedding photos. The photographer moved onto the "candid" shots and thought it would be cute to have pics of us making out at the reception. I have blonde hair. The girl in the picture did not. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48775) - you deserved it (2593)

On 09/30/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I realized that my alcoholism has gotten so bad that I rotate liquor stores so the clerks don't think bad about me. FML


I agree, your life sucks (13751) - you deserved it (47401)

On 09/22/2009 at 12:37am - health - by Cpt_Concerned (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I pulled someone over for speeding. He was only 10 over the speed limit so I gave him an $84 fine. It turns out he is a workplace Occupational Health and Safety officer and because I wasn't wearing my high visibilty vest while standing on the side of the road he gave me a $250 fine. FML


I agree, your life sucks (23527) - you deserved it (80054)

On 09/17/2009 at 6:57am - work - by auscop (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house while his plumbing was being redone. I really had to pee, but the toilet wasn't working, so I peed in his cat's litterbox. His cat got defensive, and started attacking me while I peed. My boyfriend walked in and saw the whole thing. FML


I agree, your life sucks (14650) - you deserved it (65846)

On 08/18/2009 at 9:13pm - love - by litterbox_girl (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I walked in on my husband in our room completely naked. At first I thought he was waiting for me so we could have sex. He hadn't seen me yet, so I started to undress too to surprise him. Then I saw that he had drawn a face on his penis and he was talking to it. FML


I agree, your life sucks (74061) - you deserved it (5901)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:37am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out why my boyfriend gets so upset when I make jokes about him and his best guy friend being lovers. It's because they are. FML


I agree, your life sucks (63585) - you deserved it (8367)

On 08/10/2009 at 12:31pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my grandfather was counting all the grandchildren he had and saying how fortunate he was to have all of us. When I pointed out that he'd forgotten to count me, he turned and said "You're adopted, you don't count as a real grandchild" FML


I agree, your life sucks (86792) - you deserved it (4100)

On 08/04/2009 at 8:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Singapore

Today, my boss requested that I re-organize every file in the office, because she wanted the filing cabinets alphabetized right to left, not left to right. To thank me, she came into my office to give me one uncooked ear of corn. I think my boss has mistaken me for some kind of farm animal. FML


I agree, your life sucks (48243) - you deserved it (3427)

On 07/09/2009 at 3:17pm - work - by ST3PH (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I sent out my monthly curriculum list to the parents of the kids in my math class so they can see what their children will be learning. I usually end my e-mails with the phrase 'math is power'. Now, 154 parents got an e-mail saying 'meth is power'. FML


I agree, your life sucks (41688) - you deserved it (21908)

On 07/05/2009 at 2:16pm - misc - by shit... (man) - United States (Georgia)

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