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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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sdawl

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sdawl
  • Town/Country : Wouldn't you like to know , New Hampshire
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Monday 22 May 1995 (16 years)
  • Number of visits : 5724
  • Number of comments : 18
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

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sdawl's favorite FMLs

Today, I hired an exterminator to get the roaches out of the house I am renting. I came back from work and went to my bathroom, noticing that he used the plunger to unclog the toilet after he took a dump. After $150, there was shit all over my floor and plunger, and roaches still in my kitchen. FML

#2303239 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (46490) - you deserved it (2228)

On 05/26/2009 at 5:18am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Greece (Attiki)

Today, I asked my mom to check my tonsils cause they were swollen. She said she "had" to go to my brother's game. She spent the next hour on the computer. I passed out from a clogged throat. I woke up in the hospital with my mom yelling at me for being dramatic. I was then diagnosed with lymphoma. FML

#2189541 (349)

I agree, your life sucks (103091) - you deserved it (2928)

On 05/22/2009 at 7:22pm - health - by Girlwithmono (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML

#2135843 (107)

I agree, your life sucks (39074) - you deserved it (6000)

On 05/21/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by GrahamCracker (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I had to go visit my grandma. While in her bathroom, the floss I was using cut my gum, I then proceded to make sounds of slight pain. My grandma was, at the same moment, walking by and said "Don't masturbate in side of my bathroom you sick teen!" Now my grandma thinks I am a pervert. FML

#1313726 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (42359) - you deserved it (3937)

On 04/25/2009 at 3:51am - intimacy - by bongoboy - United States (California)

Today, my 10 year old brother caught me masturbating and then said "Oh, so that's how you do it!". He then ran to his room and locked the door. I inadvertently taught my little brother how to masturbate. FML

#1308807 (171)

I agree, your life sucks (17324) - you deserved it (43777)

On 04/25/2009 at 12:13am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I am studying abroad in Mexico and someone asked me what it's like to be from Minnesota. I responded in Spanish, in front of thirty people, what I thought translated to, "If you get cold, you can just put on a jacket." Apparently, what I thought meant "jacket" actually meant "masturbate". FML

#2562 (56)

I agree, your life sucks (10198) - you deserved it (2748)

On 01/25/2009 at 7:06pm - misc - by Sally - United States (Minnesota)