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scrrwd

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scrrwd
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  • Number of visits : 205
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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scrrwd's favorite FMLs

Today, I had to explain to my son why it is not okay to slap old women's butts. He's 16. FML

#20894598
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32188) - you deserved it (4065)

On 09/24/2013 at 5:01pm - kids - by mandm - United States (New York)

Today, I had to explain to my brother why it's not OK to stick his knob in the toaster. FML

#20893446
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35713) - you deserved it (2675)

On 09/23/2013 at 8:05pm - kids - by latter - United States (Maryland)

Today, it's my birthday. I don't mind crappy gifts, but I have to wonder why the hell my boyfriend bought me a home enema kit. FML

#20890231
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36434) - you deserved it (3496)

On 09/21/2013 at 2:10pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I shaved my face after several months of growth. This would be OK if my 4-year-old daughter would still talk to me. Apparently she doesn't recognise me, and I'm scary. FML

#20887990
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37839) - you deserved it (3087)

On 09/19/2013 at 5:18pm - kids - by Smoothskin (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had to explain to my grandfather that Canadians aren't evil by reminding him that he's Canadian. FML

#20885056
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35296) - you deserved it (2350)

On 09/17/2013 at 10:21am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, we were having a family dinner with my boyfriend's parents and mine. In the kitchen, when we were getting the food ready, he proposed. I screamed. My dad thought he was hurting me, came in and tased him in the leg. FML

#20841540
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53157) - you deserved it (5835)

On 08/17/2013 at 10:18am - love - by why - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I received a lemon in a box in the mail. I didn't know from who it was, nor how he or she knows my address. There was a note on it: "When life gives you lemons, date me." FML

#20837021
188 comments

Today, I found my elderly neighbour on all fours in my garden eating my flowers. FML

#20836671
111 comments

Today, I had a dream in which I was being mugged. I started fighting the muggers off, while in reality, my fist smacked my wife in the face. Now she has a black eye, nobody believes my story, and they think I'm a wife beater. FML

#20832277
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46727) - you deserved it (4867)

On 08/11/2013 at 2:11pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I got a call from my son's kindergarten teacher. Apparently my son asked a girl to marry him. After she said no, he stabbed her with a fork. FML

#20829995
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56967) - you deserved it (5169)

On 08/10/2013 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)

Today, at the pool, a kid no older than 8 was sitting on the diving board, not letting anyone else use it. I went over and tried to reason with him, but he wouldn't listen. My uncle stormed over, said "I got this!" and punted him over the edge. We both got thrown out for "bullying" the kid. FML

#20827779
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44075) - you deserved it (5933)

On 08/08/2013 at 7:03pm - kids - by JuggaloSlasher15 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it was my son's fifth birthday. I asked my grandmother, who is a baker, to make a birthday cake for the party. Two hours after the party started, she arrived drunk with a large ham with candles in it. FML

#20826835
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47687) - you deserved it (4224)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:03am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, a customer screamed at me, because her iced coffee tasted exactly like coffee, and she hates coffee. Sadly, this isn't even the most insane person I've had to deal with at this job. FML

#20820474
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42869) - you deserved it (2283)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:09pm - work - by Neanderthals walk among us (woman) - Hungary (Budapest)

Today, my 10-year-old son told my 5-year-old daughter that we're a ghost family, and told her to run through our glass door to see for herself. She believed it, ran straight into the door, and ended up having to be taken to hospital. FML

#20813979
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52608) - you deserved it (5051)

On 07/31/2013 at 7:19pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Falkirk)

Today, while using a restroom in Walmart, an old lady with a cane hobbled in screaming, "I smell someone making sin!" She would not stop tapping on the door with her cane till I came out. FML

#20808725
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38272) - you deserved it (2305)

On 07/28/2013 at 10:16pm - health - by DreamStatic - United States (Georgia)



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