scorpioserpent

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scorpioserpent

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 31 October 1989 (26 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 84574
  • Number of comments : 162
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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scorpioserpent's page activity

Visits<b>Cindale_87</b> - the 04/19/2016 at 6:24pm<b>drunkmunkey</b> - the 01/30/2016 at 2:43am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 8:58pm<b>shanekicksass</b> - the 09/01/2015 at 12:34am<b>Twill3422</b> - the 08/10/2015 at 10:32pm<b>laxing</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 6:09pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 3:54pm<b>furstur</b> - the 06/16/2015 at 12:21am<b>Imhereforthelols</b> - the 01/06/2015 at 3:55am<b>snowboardflips</b> - the 08/07/2014 at 9:43pm<b>Fausty29</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 5:58pm<b>Lasercorn</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 3:02am<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/21/2014 at 1:28pm<b>bleached_anus</b> - the 04/11/2014 at 1:52am<b>canibalcupcake</b> - the 01/06/2013 at 9:32pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 07/15/2012 at 7:27am<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 11:34pm<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:50am

Fucked!<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 2:58am

scorpioserpent's FML badges

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scorpioserpent's favorite FMLs

Today, I was in one of two hot tubs with my dad at a vacation resort, when 3 good looking guys walked into the pool area. My dad moved to the other hot tub so the guys could hang out in the one I was in. They came outside, passed my hot tub, and went into the one my dad just moved into. FML

by pictureperfect678 / 01/18/2010 at 9:06pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Holidays

Today, at a bar, a woman approched me and tried to set me up with her friend. Looking around, the only people in the bar were a man reading the paper and a very ugly woman, looking at me and smiling. I worriedly replied, "I'm sorry, but I'm gay." Turns out her friend was the one reading the paper. FML

by awkward23 / 01/12/2010 at 5:26am / United States (Washington) / Love

Today, I went on a blind date. We had agreed on meeting in front of a park. Thinking I was there first, I texted her "I'm already there, sitting next to the fat chick." I heard a beep. SHE was the "fat chick." FML

by sarahh38 / 09/16/2009 at 2:23pm / Canada (Quebec) / Love

Today, I met my boyfriend's mother for the first time. She greeted us holding a baby, and I told her how cute her son was. She told me that it was her grandson. Turns out my boyfriend is the father. We're 16. FML

by Notyourstepmom / 09/07/2009 at 2:22pm / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was smoking a cigarette while watching the meteor shower. I was just about at the filter and as I was taking my last drag, my friend decided to scare me from behind, and I accidentally sucked the whole thing in my mouth. They don't go out immediately when in your mouth. My tongue hurts. FML

by Anonymous / 08/13/2009 at 3:24am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was 'A man running'. I didn't even get an apology. FML

by Anonymous / 08/01/2009 at 12:30am / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I passed a homeless person asking for change. When I politely apologized and told him I had none, he yelled angrily "who comes to this city without money?" I replied "apparently, you do." Wrong answer. He followed me, now screaming. FML

by re2K5 / 07/25/2009 at 12:39pm / Korea Republic of (Kyongsang-bukto) / Money

Today, I was at the movies. All of a sudden, the woman next to me starts laughing uncontrollably and talking to her friend during the movie. This continued throughout the movie, ruining it. I turned and whispered to my friend. The woman then taps me on the shoulder and yells, "Shut the fuck up!" FML

by fmlatmovies / 07/25/2009 at 11:07am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was fired from my volunteer job. Why? Because they said I was working so hard and doing such a good job that I was making the real staff look bad. FML

by SDworkinggirl / 07/05/2009 at 3:04pm / United States (South Dakota) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I was riding the subway to work. Barely anyone was on because of how early it was. Me and this one guy in a trench coat were in the same cart. His stop came. He walked by me, flashed me, rubbed his penis on my arm, and then ran away really fast. FML

by Anonymous / 06/27/2009 at 4:20am / Japan / Transportation

Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML

by dumbo / 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my friend Kate and I were helping build a playground. Halfway through, a construction worker asks where we go to school. I told him we graduated and proudly held degrees in psych. The construction worker stopped mid-dig, glanced at us sadly and said, "yeah that's what my degree's in too." FML

by blairheir721 / 05/17/2009 at 12:20am / United States (Ohio) / Work

Today, I had a hour long conversation with someone I apparently was friends with a few years ago. I couldn't remember who he was for the life of me, so I just played along. Finally, I told him I didn't remember him. He had the wrong number. I had a long conversation with a wrong number. FML

by lostintellct / 05/11/2009 at 12:46am / United States (Idaho) / Miscellaneous

Today, my mom asked if I wanted to come to dinner with my parents and my grandparents who are in from London. When we got to the restaurant, there was a wait. My mom made me walk home because they could get a table quicker for a group of four than a group of five. FML

by charlie / 05/09/2009 at 9:48pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, my roommate and I were walking to a bar and a group of guys shouted out at us "Hey, it's like we're on Animal Planet, I see a zebra and a gorilla." My roommate was wearing a zebra print shirt. FML

by Anonymous / 05/09/2009 at 9:53am / United States (New Jersey) / Transportation