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schuhbacca

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schuhbacca's page activity

Visits<b>elk21dbm</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 11:29pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 7:26am

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schuhbacca's favorite FMLs

Today, I texted my boyfriend saying that I couldn't wait for him to get home and see my costume, and that I had dressed up as a naked lady. He texted back asking if I could dress up as someone who was making dinner instead. FML

#20142541
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30569) - you deserved it (6483)

On 11/01/2012 at 3:54am - intimacy - by okay._. - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML

#20140004
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26745) - you deserved it (2801)

On 10/30/2012 at 9:27am - love - by LonelyMe -

Today, whilst in an argument with my girlfriend, I told her she was the craziest bitch I'd ever met. She responded with "Challenge accepted." I'm now terrified. FML

#20139786
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10194) - you deserved it (40524)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:08am - love - by Andrew (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my grandma took it upon herself to give me the sex talk. After explaining the mechanics in excessive detail, she said I shouldn't be afraid to sleep around. Apparently, I need to be comfortable with the man who'll be "conning me into blowing him for the next 50 years." FML

#20134273
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25666) - you deserved it (2494)

On 10/26/2012 at 1:58pm - intimacy - by fiftyshardsofbroccoli (woman) - United States

Today, I was getting intimate with my girlfriend. When she went to give me a blow job, I got embarrassed and told her I'd rather just please her instead. Now she thinks she's inadequate and I'm being a jerk. FML

#20132312
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23781) - you deserved it (16462)

On 10/25/2012 at 1:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex, and I asked him to call me something sweet. He called me Honey Boo Boo. FML

Today, I came home to find an almost completely devoured cheesecake, The Notebook playing on the TV, and a shoe thrown at my head. It's safe to say my girlfriend is just about on her period. FML

#20128340
256 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26273) - you deserved it (4791)

On 10/22/2012 at 3:08pm - misc - by jesushelpme (man) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I tried role playing with my boyfriend. As I came out in sexy lingerie, I announced, "I'm Natalia, a Russian spy fluent in 2 languages: Russian and your cock." He laughed so hard he practically pissed himself. The night ended in me doing his laundry. Alone. FML

#20119371
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30855) - you deserved it (18116)

On 10/16/2012 at 8:36am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my boyfriend and I were making out on his deck out back. When leaving, I heard the sliding glass door open on the upper deck, I froze in the yard to not be seen. Too bad I didn't move. Apparently his dad pees off the deck at night. I had to walk home covered in pee. FML

#20113299
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22897) - you deserved it (5972)

On 10/12/2012 at 7:11am - health - by monkeyzz (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I asked my husband to come upstairs to our bedroom, thinking I could get some "special time." It ended up with us arguing about his mother, and him falling asleep cuddling my pillow while sucking his thumb. FML

#20113138
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18966) - you deserved it (3060)

On 10/12/2012 at 2:15am - love - by anonymous2.0 (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, after great sex with my boyfriend, I lay in my bed while he went to get a drink from downstairs. Hearing someone come up, I shouted out as a joke, "Damn babe, I'm covered in cum, was there a hole you didn't fill?" It wasn't my boyfriend, it was my dad. FML

#20109762
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16083) - you deserved it (60852)

On 10/09/2012 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by cumhole (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I surprised my boyfriend with a bag containing condoms and sexy lingerie. He looks into it and says, "I hope you kept the receipt." FML

#20106911
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29573) - you deserved it (3874)

On 10/08/2012 at 1:39am - intimacy - by juliette (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend doggy-style. I was getting close when he suddenly blurts out, "Babe, you really need to bleach your asshole." FML

#20095626
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30891) - you deserved it (4940)

On 09/30/2012 at 7:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, in the middle of sex, my boyfriend sighed, said "I can't do this any more" and pulled out. After repeatedly asking him what was wrong, he basically told me that I suck in bed. Apparently, the way I "just lie there" makes him feel like a necrophile. FML

#20092519
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11983) - you deserved it (44750)

On 09/28/2012 at 5:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he came. This was a good thing, except when he did he started bellowing the Imperial March theme from Star Wars. When I asked him about it, all he said was, "I thought you'd like it." FML

#20089963
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21862) - you deserved it (3538)

On 09/26/2012 at 6:54pm - intimacy - by wickedbeauty333 (woman) - United States (Texas)



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