Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

schuhbacca

Search for a member

schuhbacca

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 605
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

schuhbacca's page activity

Visits<b>elk21dbm</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 11:29pm<b>jadeluv</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 7:26am

schuhbacca's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

See all of schuhbacca's badges

schuhbacca's favorite FMLs

Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML

#17429477
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33903) - you deserved it (6475)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by noway - Singapore

Today, I finally noticed that my wife only shaves her bush when she goes on "business trips." FML

#17414090
240 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54551) - you deserved it (4588)

On 08/09/2011 at 12:59am - intimacy - by ksmith - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was feeling a little naughty, so I put on a sexy outfit, laid down on the hood of my boyfriend's car, and waited for him to find me. When he came into the garage and saw me, he freaked out and bitched at me, because I "could have dented the chassis". FML

#17322871
420 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33146) - you deserved it (14565)

On 07/31/2011 at 6:19pm - intimacy - by username (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I called my boyfriend to let him know that after he gets off work, he can find me in his room wearing something sexy. He responded with, "Please don't touch anything." FML

#17299203
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30321) - you deserved it (4827)

On 07/29/2011 at 3:56pm - intimacy - by Elizabeth (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

#17128085
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34878) - you deserved it (8411)

On 07/15/2011 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I pretended to not be able to go out with a friend so I could hang with my boyfriend at the movies. When I sat down I received a text that said "turn around" it was her. FML

#16181891
201 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9424) - you deserved it (63777)

On 05/15/2011 at 1:20am - misc - by marmarr - United States

Today, my girlfriend kindly let me know that she didn't care that I am 'below average' in the penis department because it will leave her nice and tight for her next boyfriend. FML

#15948281
339 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65355) - you deserved it (7370)

On 04/27/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML

#14990668
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45223) - you deserved it (13034)

On 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, while sitting on the couch, my boyfriend came over, pulled his penis out of his fly, and started stabbing me in the face with it while humming the Jaws theme. FML

#14990668
291 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45223) - you deserved it (13034)

On 02/15/2011 at 2:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

#14305984
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40060) - you deserved it (8576)

On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, as I got to my first class seat on an airplane, I saw the person I'd be sitting next to wafting the smell of her vagina towards herself and breathing in deeply. It's an eight hour flight. FML

#14239433
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39808) - you deserved it (3455)

On 12/17/2010 at 8:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40166) - you deserved it (9877)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I found out my girlfriend had sex with three different guys in one day. All at a party. A party that I was at. FML

#14035490
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45585) - you deserved it (6344)

On 11/30/2010 at 12:46pm - intimacy - by crushed (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was feeling in the mood, so I walked into the kitchen with only my boxers on and asked my girlfriend if she wanted to get in bed. She said, "Okay, but make sure to finish before Gossip Girl starts." FML

#12887045
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25137) - you deserved it (7461)

On 09/03/2010 at 3:42pm - intimacy - by Sexylarry - Sent from mobile version



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: