scarman

Search for a member

Offline (the 04/22/2015 at 3:03am)

scarman

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 745
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About scarman : Fan of Arrow and Legend of Korra, Star Wars Rebels and Flash. I enjoy EDM, but I don't hold a grudge against any genre of music. Feel free to message me!

scarman's page activity

Visits<b>incoherentrmblr</b> - the 04/12/2015 at 11:43pm<b>imateapot_723</b> - the 04/09/2015 at 7:01pm<b>Jae_Hellyun</b> - the 03/23/2015 at 1:13am<b>Micheal23</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 1:26am<b>thecouchisalive</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 3:45am<b>thevelociraptor</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 1:23am<b>AviatOfficial</b> - the 12/23/2014 at 10:55pm<b>beffnytutt</b> - the 12/15/2014 at 12:23am<b>jonidoe</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 3:35pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 11/22/2014 at 6:57am<b>triplebeerox</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 5:41am<b>MonkeyKi</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 4:03am<b>lemondude04</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 10:48pm<b>mahovalia</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 6:01pm<b>Xeebar</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:45pm<b>Philiphead</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:37pm<b>Mak007</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:17pm<b>muzak23</b> - the 11/20/2014 at 4:11pm

scarman's FML badges

YDI master

That was your 500th “you totally deserved it” vote. We admire your dedication.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

I moderated this!

In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!

See all of scarman's badges

scarman's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave a presentation to my college class about life with Tourette syndrome. I only got 3 minutes into it before my asswipe classmates started yelling stuff like "Shit!", "Cock!", and "Bob Saget!" I gave up and went back to my seat in tears as our bored instructor said "Next." FML

by Anonymous / 01/10/2015 at 5:12pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out why my wife has been cold and distant lately. She went to a psycho fraudster - sorry, I mean "psychic medium" - who said I'm lusting after other women and am thinking about leaving her. She actually believed him. Now I'm considering leaving her for real. Well played, I guess. FML

by Anonymous / 12/06/2014 at 4:52pm / Belgium / Love

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

by notsofriendly / 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I was waiting at a traffic light next to an ice cream van. The man in it turned to me and winked, making sexual hand gestures. I felt my childhood die horribly as I watched. FML

by Anonymous / 10/24/2014 at 8:30pm / Australia (Western Australia) / Love

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to slip a condom under my pillow at boot camp. The staff found out, I got bitched out for 30 minutes straight, and now I have to put a condom on the grip of any rifle I'm issued for a week. My new callsign is "Love Glove". FML

by LoveGlove / 06/21/2014 at 5:42pm / Canada (Alberta) / Work

Today, I retrieved the wrong luggage from an airport carousel. I'm now the owner of two water-bras, a false beard, a bag of cat litter, and some anal beads. I am afraid to get in touch with the original owner. FML

by BaggedDown / 05/07/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my art teacher showed off a painting of his name he got in Japan. I can read Japanese, and it actually says "Old idiot". I really don't want to break it to him. FML

by Sam / 05/04/2014 at 2:12am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I found out the reason our toilet paper has been disappearing so fast recently isn't because my son is wanking like a gibbon as I first thought. He's just been using our shredder to make streamers out of the stuff, then hiding it all in a box in his closet. Fucking hell, son. FML

by Anonymous / 05/02/2014 at 10:04am / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Kids

Today, my co-worker started talking in third person. Not only that, but he narrates his daily tasks. "Jeff reached for a stapler", "Jeff stapled a report". I have to sit beside this chimp for 8 hours a day, and nothing I say can end this. FML

by war_monkey / 04/10/2014 at 8:20am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my drunken self became a vaguely racist poet. I am now the author of a four-page poem entitled "Chocolate Men". FML

by chocochoco / 03/23/2014 at 11:40pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in my Honors English class. I sneezed very loudly while my teacher was giving a lecture. I had the genius idea to say, "Sorry, I'm allergic to bullshit." FML

by Catuser / 03/05/2014 at 10:09pm / United States (Virginia) / Miscellaneous

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I fainted. Instead of stopping to help, some guy stopped to draw a penis on my forehead. The EMT laughed. FML

by Anonymous / 05/29/2013 at 11:21am / United States / Health

Today, my colleague yet again misused the word "literally." It's driving me insane. I have to work opposite him and hear him say things like he's just "literally shit himself inside out." FML

by Rebecca / 05/21/2012 at 10:11am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

by BadGuyLuck / 02/25/2012 at 1:33am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, someone peed in my physical education locker. The only way someone could've done it is with a ladder. I'm so popular it hurts. FML

by Anonymous / 02/15/2012 at 7:46am / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous