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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Consolation prize
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
Follow up
You subsequently gave feedback by commenting on an FML that you’d submitted and was published.
Today, while taking a shower, I saw shadows moving across the curtains. The shadow turned out to be a cricket that then fell into the tub. I ran out of the bathroom screaming and naked. My little sister came to my door and said, "If I hadn't just seen your balls, I would swear mom had TWO daughters." FML
I agree, your life sucks (8740) - you deserved it (27612)
On 12/11/2009 at 8:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
I agree, your life sucks (50315) - you deserved it (2659)
On 11/15/2009 at 7:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)
Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27744) - you deserved it (9870)
On 10/07/2009 at 7:13am - misc - by shitballs_911 (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames)
Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27744) - you deserved it (9870)
On 10/07/2009 at 7:13am - misc - by shitballs_911 (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames)
Today, my fiancé was performing oral on me, when I heard him start making a "Waka waka waka waka" noise. He confessed to pretending to be Pacman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17232) - you deserved it (3500)
On 10/03/2009 at 9:03pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I was eating MandMs on a chair when I dropped one and it fell under my crotch. My mom came in to see my hand on my crotch and me muttering, "Where is that little bastard?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (51054) - you deserved it (11675)
On 09/11/2009 at 2:26pm - misc - by awilson (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (97264) - you deserved it (23465)
On 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by mandy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40094) - you deserved it (123013)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I was at my school's spaghetti dinner with my family. My brother shook up my mom's soda, as a prank. My entire class witnessed my mom waving around an overflowing Diet Coke while my dad yelled, "Come on, put your mouth on it! Suck it! Suck it, Kathy!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (92946) - you deserved it (6036)
On 08/18/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by gbhlaughingstock (man) - United States
Today, I felt inspired to create a photo album of myself through the years. As I was organizing the photos of my childhood, I noticed how many my mom was holding me and hugging me in. When she came home from work I jokingly asked, "When did you start hating me?" She replied, "When you were 4". FML
I agree, your life sucks (34217) - you deserved it (4143)
On 08/11/2009 at 9:43pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Today, my mom drove me to football practice. On the way she told me that she thought I was gay and that my friend was my lover. After 15 agonizing minutes of this, we get to my practice only to be greeted by my shirtless friend wearing a pink bandana saying "Man, you hit me hard last night." FML
I agree, your life sucks (64749) - you deserved it (5045)
On 08/10/2009 at 3:10am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting a bit steamy. After a few minutes, he jumps up and runs over to the closet and puts on a long brown jacket putting the hood over to his eyes. He looks me in the eyes and says 'I am Obi Wan Kenobi and I'm going to slay you with my light saber'. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43095) - you deserved it (7428)
On 08/02/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by dam01 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)
Today, I was at the store with my mother in the facial care section. I found this device that scrubs your face with those anti-bacterial pads. The aisle was crowded and noisy, so I shouted to my mother, "Can I have this vibrator thing?" It went silent. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13231) - you deserved it (35862)
On 07/29/2009 at 3:23am - misc - by Nikse (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (91536) - you deserved it (27411)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (91536) - you deserved it (27411)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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