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scarletpenguin

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scarletpenguin

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 2 October 1989 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 207
  • Number of comments : 24
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

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scarletpenguin's page activity

Visits<b>Patty410</b> - the 07/10/2014 at 7:01pm<b>Flowtastic</b> - the 06/03/2014 at 12:45am<b>byefelicia1992</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 10:38pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 12/01/2009 at 4:48pm<b>Boudewijn</b> - the 12/01/2009 at 1:30pm

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You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

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scarletpenguin's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend told me he wanted to drive to India. Thinking he meant Indiana, I said sure, knowing I have friends there. He said, "Bangladesh, India, here we come!" He was serious. FML

#21128139
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36055) - you deserved it (6469)

On 05/01/2014 at 5:29pm - misc - by GAGirl1 (woman) - United States

Today, I found out I'm actually the uncle of my children. All four of them. FML

#20662485
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (97956) - you deserved it (5950)

On 05/14/2013 at 3:13am - kids - by Liferuinedforever (man) - Pakistan (Sindh)

Today, I was playing video games at 2am. My guinea pig started squealing at me, and wouldn't stop until I turned out the lights and got into bed. I'm 20 years old, and I've let a rodent dictate my bedtime. FML

#17911621
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25205) - you deserved it (19922)

On 10/05/2011 at 2:58pm - animals - by Beeisc00l - Reserved

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

#17737717
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27920) - you deserved it (11461)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was unbelievably horny so I sent a kinky text message to a boy I really like, only to receive the reply, "Not tonight, I'm raging Minecraft, having a wank, and going to sleep. Try again tomorrow." FML

#16667115
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36334) - you deserved it (14157)

On 06/14/2011 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by Username - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was eating Star Wars gummy candies and I bit R2-D2 in half. My girlfriend looked at it and said "Oh look, now he's R1-D1". It was super cute, but I couldn't help thinking, "That's not how the numbering system works for droids." FML

#16657656
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13639) - you deserved it (47842)

On 06/14/2011 at 6:04am - misc - by techiefIve (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend and I were making out in a motel room. Just before we really got started I noticed that I forgot to close the drapes. Once I got up to close them I saw 3 maids and the manager run away. FML

#16588229
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32601) - you deserved it (11706)

On 06/10/2011 at 12:08am - intimacy - by henry feingold - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I sent my boyfriend a long and heartfelt message. He responded with "tl; dr". FML

#16540181
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26055) - you deserved it (6027)

On 06/07/2011 at 12:43am - love - by Maddie110110 (woman) - United States (Texas)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36629) - you deserved it (31266)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)

Today, in an attempt to get my son to stop playing Call of Duty, I threw his Xbox controller out the window. He was so desperate, he followed it. His bedroom is on the second floor. My son has 3 broken ribs, and no future. FML

#15405912
491 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34588) - you deserved it (48562)

On 03/20/2011 at 9:25pm - kids - by failureparent (man) - United States (California)

Today, my 400 pound roommate brought home a 400 pound guy. Now there's 800 pounds of sex going on in the next room, and it sounds like the invasion of Normandy in there. FML

#14835077
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69539) - you deserved it (6556)

On 02/04/2011 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job. As I reached my climax, she thought it would be funny to turn my 'weapon' against me. Boom, headshot. FML

#14610613
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39984) - you deserved it (26526) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 4:53am - intimacy - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, my boyfriend sent me a picture of his morning dump because it was heart-shaped. FML

#14608701
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32005) - you deserved it (5636) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by SkinsCastSelection - France - Chosen by the cast of Skins

Today, after months of her begging me, I let my girlfriend cut my hair for the first time. It turned out so badly that we are now "taking a break until it looks normal again." FML

#14338674
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25914) - you deserved it (5268)

On 12/25/2010 at 8:38pm - misc - by badhairday (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my boyfriend and I were in our room getting hot and heavy. As he was entering me, he started making electronic whirring sounds. Once inside, he said in a robotic voice, "Initiating launch sequence in 3... 2... 1..." and began thrusting as fast as possible. FML

#14333152
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41339) - you deserved it (8699)

On 12/25/2010 at 8:38am - intimacy - by Jessie - United States (Texas)



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