sayraaaaah_

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Offline (the 07/20/2016 at 10:20am)

sayraaaaah_

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  • Number of visits : 902
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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sayraaaaah_'s favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML

by Kiki / 03/08/2013 at 4:22pm / Poland (Malopolskie) / Love

Today, in the middle of the night, I got up to go get some water. When I came back, I was going to flop onto my bed, but I faceplanted into my floor. I'd forgotten that I'd rearranged my room and moved my bed. FML

by ayye_its_nikki / 12/19/2012 at 12:07am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, my neighbor installed a large radio that loudly plays Christmas music 24/7. When I called in a complaint to the police department they told me to, "get in the Christmas spirit." FML

by James / 12/17/2012 at 9:28pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my dad and brother that I want to take Zumba classes. My brother said, "Did you hear that? Pumbaa wants to Zumba!" Then he starting dancing and making pig noises. My dad high-fived him. When my mom heard, she high-fived him too. FML

by hakuna matata / 10/31/2012 at 6:06am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was singing one of my favorite songs in my car while at a red light. A guy made it a point to get my attention and said, "If you're really going to sing that bad, you should probably roll your windows up." FML

by Anonymous / 10/21/2012 at 12:24am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, after finishing a song during karaoke, a man came up to me and held out his hand. Quite flattered, I shook it, said thanks and that I was glad he enjoyed it. Turns out he was next and just wanted the microphone. FML

by Anonymous / 08/30/2012 at 4:52am / United States (Wisconsin) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was entering a guy's number into my phone, and I couldn't remember his name. Embarrassed, I tried to be sneaky and asked, "Can you spell your name for me, please?" His name is Bob. FML

by Bernadette / 06/28/2012 at 3:58pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML

by sopheeah / 05/29/2012 at 3:54am / Australia (Victoria) / Health

Today, I wanted to freshen up my room, so I bought some Febreze. Standing on my bed, I began to spray, not noticing that the air vent directly across was turned on. The spray came directly back at me. The doctor says that the irritation in my eyes may last for several days. FML

by prettysmellingbedroom / 02/15/2012 at 9:18am / United States / Health

Today, was the fifth night I've dreamed of brushing my teeth. I wake up about three times a night because as I spit in my dream, I actually spit on my face as I'm sleeping. FML

by wetdreams / 02/04/2012 at 7:35pm / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous

Today, it was my first time having sex with this guy. After a few second he stops, sits in the corner of his room buff-naked, with his knees up and his hands on his face. He then pouts and claims it was his worst performance ever. FML

by crybaby / 02/01/2012 at 3:19am / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy

Today, I stayed up until 4 am. I was waiting for both my cats to fall asleep, so I could play Santa and stuff their stockings in secret. FML

by Anonymoose / 12/25/2011 at 6:39am / Switzerland (Zurich) / Animals

Today, after having recently moved 300 miles to be with my boyfriend of 2 years, I have to celebrate Christmas alone. He never thought our relationship important enough to tell his family about me, and doesn't want it to be "awkward." FML

by FML / 12/23/2011 at 8:32pm / Sweden (Kronobergs Lan) / Love

Today, I had my first kiss with the woman I've been in love with for two years. Right as I kissed her, some guys drove by in a car and threw some soggy spaghetti at me, yelling, "Noob!" FML

by johncabbot25 / 12/23/2011 at 5:53am / Canada / Love

Today, my boyfriend left me for my neighbor. Her name is Hope. She'd better "hope" I don't take a dump in her yard. FML

by queenlatifa101bebe / 12/09/2011 at 9:48pm / United States / Miscellaneous