About sayaaaa : Hello.
Don't really have much to say about myself other than I enjoy reading and taking long, moonlit walks on the beach. Nah i'm kidding, I've never been on a long, moonlit walk on the beach but I do enjoy reading and eating more food than a bulking body builder.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
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Mobility
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Today, I woke up to my drunk great grandfather peeing on my cat and thinking it was absolutely hysterical. This isn't the first time and he just moved in with me for the next six weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14539) - you deserved it (1248)
On 07/05/2012 at 9:38am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New York)
Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5325) - you deserved it (14367)
On 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by hakura madada - Japan (Tokyo)
Today, I mistook my dog's head for the gear shift while tearing down the highway. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5325) - you deserved it (14367)
On 06/22/2012 at 3:41pm - misc - by hakura madada - Japan (Tokyo)
Today, I learned that when my girlfriend told me that she's a different person without coffee and smokes in the morning, she wasn't kidding; after I'd asked her how she'd slept, she bitched me out for "mocking her" and hurled a hairdryer at my head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16231) - you deserved it (2485)
On 06/18/2012 at 12:57am - love - by crazybitch - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my identical twin sister's boyfriend walked over to me, and whispered in my ear, "I know what you look like naked." FML
I agree, your life sucks (34114) - you deserved it (2875)
On 06/12/2012 at 2:28pm - misc - by creeped out - United States (New York)
Today, I asked my girlfriend why she never lets me in her house. She stared blankly and said, "What is inside is not for thine eyes." I told her best friend about this creepiness later on. She sighed and said, "T'was not for mine eyes either. I didst fail to listen." I feel like I'm losing my mind here. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18766) - you deserved it (2420)
On 06/11/2012 at 5:45pm - love - by amidreaming?? (man) - United Kingdom (Hertford)
Today, my sister, knowing that I'm terrified of his face, taped a picture of Michael Jackson over our toilet. When I entered the washroom, I sprinted back out screaming. Minutes later, while in the shower, I happened to glance up at the ceiling. Guess who was grinning down at me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20696) - you deserved it (7339)
Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24368) - you deserved it (3291)
On 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm - health - by LaurenB (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24368) - you deserved it (3291)
On 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm - health - by LaurenB (woman) - United States (New Hampshire)
Today, my mother is trying to convince me to divorce my husband. He has a tattoo of a skull on his shoulder and she believes this means he kills people. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18518) - you deserved it (2138)
On 06/06/2012 at 4:06am - love - by facepalm (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my boss became obsessed with a movie about a pimp. He now refers to all my female coworkers as his "bitches" and refuses to treat us like human beings. Whenever we make a mistake, he rolls his eyes and laughs, "So typical of a prostie." FML
I agree, your life sucks (26228) - you deserved it (2075)
On 06/04/2012 at 11:47pm - work - by kufan1324 - United States
Today, a homeless guy grabbed me and started ranting that "the Mayans were right" or some shit. He was making about as much sense as Charlie Sheen outside of a padded cell, so I shoved him away. That's when he decided to pull a knife and chase me all the way to my car. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18182) - you deserved it (2622)
On 06/01/2012 at 5:08pm - misc - by kay (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)
Today, my daughter was still acting out her teenage issues. This morning, when I told her to, "Have a nice day" she screamed at me, "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (23176) - you deserved it (3053) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!
On 05/30/2012 at 6:41pm - kids - by Aldoch -
Today, I was in the car with my daughter, when I narrowly missed hitting a car after running a stop sign. After she screamed at me and demanded to know what I was doing, I had to admit that I'd been daydreaming about David Bowie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3741) - you deserved it (18248)
On 04/16/2012 at 3:35pm - misc - by DJ Clitter (man) - United States
Today, I was at the park with my friends. We were all having fun on the swings, when out of nowhere I heard a thud, followed by a child crying. Turns out I accidentally kicked him in the head. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17252) - you deserved it (5213)
On 03/19/2012 at 4:18pm - kids - by Evelyn - United States
Monday 20 May 2013
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