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saurik

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saurik

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1005
  • Number of comments : 47
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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saurik's page activity

Visits<b>KiaKarma</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 6:19pm<b>IHATEFMYLIFE</b> - the 06/21/2013 at 9:01am<b>Matthew86</b> - the 04/10/2013 at 2:12am<b>AvSvart</b> - the 12/02/2012 at 4:28pm<b>whateverer</b> - the 10/03/2011 at 6:33am<b>DocBastard</b> - the 09/30/2011 at 11:04am<b>j_rand2010</b> - the 04/30/2010 at 4:05pm<b>JDM_AE86</b> - the 04/15/2010 at 1:07am<b>RedPillSucks</b> - the 04/12/2010 at 11:39pm<b>Tadeusz</b> - the 04/12/2010 at 11:56am

saurik's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

saurik's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom took me to a counselor because of my addiction to watermelon. FML

#16990029
26 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31450) - you deserved it (5350)

On 07/05/2011 at 6:28pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I'm too sunburned to masturbate. Now I have nothing to do. FML

#16432194
267 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20505) - you deserved it (63961)

On 05/31/2011 at 7:21am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

#14190460
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40189) - you deserved it (9879)

On 12/13/2010 at 12:35pm - intimacy - by Wisconsin love - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I met my roommate for the first time. I walked in the door to see him in full Roman gladiator gear, screaming at the computer because he lost 18 knights. He also told me he wakes up every 3 hours to make sure his army is still intact. FML

#13521547
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35288) - you deserved it (2975)

On 10/20/2010 at 3:00am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got grounded because I didn't go to my dog's birthday party. FML

#13465366
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30607) - you deserved it (6727)

On 10/15/2010 at 11:06pm - misc - by jacky tu - United States (California)

Today, I had a wet dream about having sexual relations with a rubber duck. FML

#13373695
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29770) - you deserved it (8937)

On 10/09/2010 at 1:15am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)

Today, I was riding the subway when a beautiful topless girl walked into my car and sat directly in front of me. Then, the train stopped abruptly and I banged my head. The girl was gone and I realized it had all been a dream. Then I realized I was supposed to get off 17 stops ago. FML

#12544003
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17795) - you deserved it (37295)

On 08/15/2010 at 6:31pm - intimacy - by Peekaman (man) - United States (New York)

Today, my mom found my pack of cigarettes. She's now making me go to rehab. I had only smoked one cigarette ever just to try it. I didn't even like it. FML

#12023644
315 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17188) - you deserved it (42085)

On 07/21/2010 at 12:08pm - misc - by Goody2shoes (man) - India (Maharashtra)

Today, I met my biological mother for the first time. She stole my wallet. FML

#11989675
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59377) - you deserved it (3639)

On 07/19/2010 at 8:23pm - misc - by thanksmom (woman) - United States

Today, my kids surprised me when I got home. One of them played the Rocky theme song on the stereo, and the other came up to me and said, "Daddy, let's go. We need you to drop about 15 pounds before you appear in front of all of our friends at our play." FML

#11980877
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28312) - you deserved it (7339)

On 07/19/2010 at 9:59am - kids - by Cody (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was brushing my teeth and shaving in the shower. My favorite song came on, and I got mixed up. My tongue and mouth are cut badly now. FML

#11943305
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14722) - you deserved it (53012)

On 07/17/2010 at 2:23pm - misc - by knighton16 (man) - United States (Utah)

Today, I hired somebody to send me love letters. I'm that lonely. FML

#11890639
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35635) - you deserved it (18440)

On 07/15/2010 at 1:19am - love - by lonely (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I've recently gained weight so I bought an exercise video. I started it right away in my room on the top floor. My younger sister screamed and ran outside a few minutes later. She thought it was an earthquake. FML

#11865183
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33730) - you deserved it (9294)

On 07/14/2010 at 12:32am - health - by sarah - United States

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

#11841759
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37337) - you deserved it (9674)

On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States

Today, my mother-in-law grounded me because I went to the store in the "dangerous" rain. My husband says that if I don't obey then we won't work out. FML

#8916783
307 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35260) - you deserved it (4392)

On 03/08/2010 at 10:12am - misc - by anonymous - United States



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  • So, is everyone back from their vacation? Can we get back to regular programming? No? OK, I get it. You're all still crying about not being at the beach any more, well, I am anyway. And this time of year…

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