Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

saruhhh

Offline (22 hours ago) | Search for a member

saruhhh

37Fucked!

saruhhhsaruhhh
  • Town/Country : Howell, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 July 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 11524
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About saruhhh : i'm sarah. i live in michigan.

saruhhh's page activity

Visits<b>Jonsey21</b> - 9 hours ago<b>Seabass_Chan</b> - the 02/03/2016 at 12:21am<b>TheFirstHipster</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 11:59am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 4:58pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 12:25am<b>CalvinZ31</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 10:13pm<b>First_JOman</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 9:17pm<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 9:13pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 4:21pm<b>lkah</b> - the 01/24/2016 at 12:42am<b>tranced_</b> - the 01/23/2016 at 1:33am<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 01/22/2016 at 5:10pm<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 5:24am<b>stangbang92</b> - the 01/21/2016 at 12:15am<b>StunninW</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 9:25am<b>Unwantedpanda</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 7:36am<b>lexred</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 10:08pm<b>saba_ajira</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 11:08am

Fucked!<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 1:56am<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 3:13am<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:37pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 5:15am<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 4:02pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 7:21am<b>shaobi</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:17am<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 11:22am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 2:25am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:19am<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 8:41pm<b>JMCJester69</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 6:29pm<b>2infbvcxxcvbj</b> - the 11/25/2015 at 3:50am<b>Neut</b> - the 11/20/2015 at 10:16am<b>fastman19</b> - the 11/19/2015 at 1:22pm<b>andrewbezy</b> - the 11/16/2015 at 4:30am<b>buckdharma</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 2:09pm<b>jayy1234</b> - the 11/14/2015 at 4:59am

saruhhh's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

See all of saruhhh's badges

saruhhh's favorite FMLs

Today, I got pulled over while dancing to crazy techno beats in the car. The officer RAN out of his car and up to mine and pounded on my window. He thought I was having a seizure. FML

#1292437
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48675) - you deserved it (22471)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:10pm - misc - by bdutton (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML

#1292043
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78820) - you deserved it (9243)

On 04/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML

#1292043
395 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78820) - you deserved it (9243)

On 04/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I didn't wear my contacts. Determined to prove to my friends I didn't need them, I read all the signs in sight. I couldn't read a particular one, so I began to walk closer. Suddenly I fell on my face, bruising my cheekbone. The sign said: "Caution: Watch Your Step." FML

#1248987
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13561) - you deserved it (62381)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:36am - misc - by notexactly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a job interview. Everything was going really well until I noticed a bug on my interviewer's lower neck. I shouted that something really disgusting was crawling on him. It turns out it was his big hairy mole. FML

#1125126
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19606) - you deserved it (59490)

On 04/19/2009 at 5:52pm - work - by Crunchy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to get some teeth pulled. I had Novocaine in my gums and lip so I couldn't feel a thing. When the doctor is pulling out the last tooth, he sneezes and pulls the tooth out. He looks in my mouth and I hear, "Oh, shit..." I now have stitches in my mouth. FML

#1123097
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57612) - you deserved it (2455)

On 04/19/2009 at 4:48pm - health - by TT (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I discovered the worst possible situation in which to get explosive diarrhea: on a 9-hour transatlantic flight. Next to an attractive single guy. FML

#1094822
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69039) - you deserved it (3567)

On 04/18/2009 at 7:11pm - health - by crapgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a surgery to remove a cyst from my butt. Afterwards that doctor told me that the cyst was bigger than he initially thought, it would still secrete fluids for two weeks, and the best remedy for this was to wear a maxi-pad. I'm a guy, and am currently wearing a maxi-pad on my butt. FML

#1082247
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (106096) - you deserved it (6224)

On 04/18/2009 at 10:24am - health - by Ian (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was petting my cat when my new mood ring turned bright purple. I checked the piece of paper that came with the ring and saw that purple meant I was feeling "hot, sexy, and passionate." According to my ring, I'm hot for my cat. FML

#1070820
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45312) - you deserved it (16312)

On 04/17/2009 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by shutupandsmile18 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML

#1068348
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (165664) - you deserved it (9536)

On 04/17/2009 at 9:19pm - intimacy - by gringa_Peru (woman) - Peru (Lima)

Today, I swam in a race against all of the girls in the midwest in the hardest, longest, most grueling race you can swim. I won. Happy but so tired I could barely move, I looked up to see my time. I had been disqualified. For flinching. Before the race started. FML

#1054756
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (82258) - you deserved it (6468)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in the supermarket and I see this little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I go over to him and ask if his mom knows where he is. The boy turns around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML

#1054716
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31368) - you deserved it (55438)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by jules (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had to re-take an hour long MRI scan because I got an erection midway through. FML

#1051780
170 comments

I agree, your life sucks (71973) - you deserved it (16881)

On 04/17/2009 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML

#1035901
301 comments

I agree, your life sucks (84745) - you deserved it (6724)

On 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by Kelavmeister (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML

#1033363
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41370) - you deserved it (337307)

On 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm - misc - by tvaladie (man) - United States (Tennessee)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: