saruhhh

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saruhhh

44Fucked!

saruhhhsaruhhh
  • Town/Country : Howell, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 July 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 13136
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About saruhhh : i'm sarah. i live in michigan.

saruhhh's page activity

Visits<b>jbuckets_404</b> - 14 hours ago<b>tin_cup</b> - yesterday at 9:42am<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 05/25/2016 at 5:11pm<b>anyagrande</b> - the 05/21/2016 at 5:48am<b>tyler_jay</b> - the 05/19/2016 at 12:58am<b>chaosmagnet</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 8:18am<b>sakoman</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 7:41am<b>Cbjhockeyfan</b> - the 05/08/2016 at 10:13am<b>mrlucky22</b> - the 05/04/2016 at 11:09pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 05/03/2016 at 1:29pm<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 3:19pm<b>Magnoxidans</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 11:20pm<b>iliveformystery</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 1:41pm<b>lambda</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 11:41pm<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 1:59pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 3:11am<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 3:03am<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 12:11am

Fucked!<b>jbuckets_404</b> - yesterday at 7:32am<b>mrlucky22</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:20pm<b>patte</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 9:56pm<b>lambda</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 5:41am<b>Magnoxidans</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 3:50am<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 11:06am<b>Montiphelia</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 9:43pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 1:56am<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 3:13am<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:37pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 5:15am<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 4:02pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 7:21am<b>shaobi</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:17am<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 11:22am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 2:25am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:19am<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 8:41pm

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saruhhh's favorite FMLs

Today, I gave my wife a cat. The first thing it did when it got out of the box was scratch the sh*t out of my leg. Next, it ran up to my wife and purred. She said, "Good cat." FML

by prevostsrocklike / 05/11/2009 at 8:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Animals

Today, I realized what my mom has been calling me for 20 years. She always calls me her "little fehler." With her being from Germany, I always thought it was a cute little nickname. Apparently, she's been calling me her "little mistake." FML

by mistake / 05/11/2009 at 5:09am / United States (Nevada) / Miscellaneous

Today, I received a list of employee names who were losing their jobs and I had to remove them from the system as I work for IT. I was on the list. That's right. My last responsibility as an employee was removing myself from the system for security reasons. FML

by IT_4_Hire / 05/10/2009 at 4:41pm / United States (Indiana) / Work

Today, I was supposed to catch a 4:40 flight to New York. My 5 year old son handed me my carry on bag as I left the house. Turns out he had put his older brother's BB gun into my bag to "keep me safe." I missed my flight after I was detained and strip-searched. FML

by sucksforme. / 05/10/2009 at 1:05am / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I went to the zoo with a guy I like, when we were there we saw a swarm of bees. I told him that if I got stung he would have to watch me because my dad is deathly allergic to bees and I have never been stung. Jokingly, he nudged me into the bush and said "let's see". We did. I'm allergic. FML

by busybee / 05/09/2009 at 11:38pm / United States (Illinois) / Health

Today, while working my job as a cashier, one of the customers that came to the register was a midget. As part of store policy, I had to ID him, and his driver's license said he was from Florida. So I asked, without catching myself, "How's the weather down there?" FML

by Failoffel / 05/09/2009 at 10:05pm / United States (Connecticut) / Work

Today, my mom asked if I wanted to come to dinner with my parents and my grandparents who are in from London. When we got to the restaurant, there was a wait. My mom made me walk home because they could get a table quicker for a group of four than a group of five. FML

by charlie / 05/09/2009 at 9:48pm / United States (Delaware) / Miscellaneous

Today, I picked up my passport, as my previous one was damaged in a car crash. As the teller warns me that a pattern of damaged passports will result in longer processing periods, she spills her coffee - all over my new passport. I'm supposed to go overseas in a month. FML

by Anonymous / 05/07/2009 at 12:29am / Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi) / Holidays

Today, I was pulled over for speeding. When the police officer approached me and asked for license and registration, I accidentally gave him my fake I.D. FML

by FakeID / 05/06/2009 at 4:05pm / United States (Georgia) / Transportation

Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad. I decided to speed to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML

by jojo / 05/06/2009 at 3:11pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, my family was preparing a turkey for my grandma's birthday dinner when my aunt noticed a utensil on the counter and asked what it was for. My mom said it was used to keep the turkey's legs together. My aunt responded to her by saying, "Maybe you should get one for your daughter." FML

by Familyskank / 05/06/2009 at 12:57pm / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML

by pissedoffandon / 05/06/2009 at 10:07am / United Kingdom (London) / Animals

Today, I lost track of time while rocking out, butt-naked, to Kelly Clarkson and Michelle Branch after taking a shower. Three of my metalhead friends had let themselves in my house and were on the lower level laughing their butts off at me for 30 minutes before telling me. I'm a 23 year old guy. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 2:26am / United States (Connecticut) / Miscellaneous

Today, I thought it would be a good idea to superglue a couple quarters to the sidewalk downtown and watch people try to pick them up. Unfortunately, street patrol was watching me glue everything the whole time. I was fined with public vandalism and defacing US currency. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2009 at 1:43am / United States (California) / Money

Today, I saw my neighbor's son mowing their lawn when suddenly he started to do this crazy dance. Chuckling at his antics I waved and walked back into my house. His mom called me from a hospital later to ask if I could put the mower away; he had been attacked by bees. FML

by Jon / 05/04/2009 at 8:46pm / United States (Maine) / Kids