saruhhh

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saruhhh

43Fucked!

saruhhhsaruhhh
  • Town/Country : Howell, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 July 1991 (24 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 12527
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About saruhhh : i'm sarah. i live in michigan.

saruhhh's page activity

Visits<b>mrlucky22</b> - 22 hours ago<b>ARetardedSeal</b> - yesterday at 3:19pm<b>michaelm1290</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 10:51am<b>Magnoxidans</b> - the 04/28/2016 at 11:20pm<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 4:09pm<b>iliveformystery</b> - the 04/27/2016 at 1:41pm<b>lambda</b> - the 04/22/2016 at 11:41pm<b>Taymoo1515</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 1:59pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 3:11am<b>firefighterbee</b> - the 04/12/2016 at 3:03am<b>tin_cup</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 6:01pm<b>crazy_bananas</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 12:11am<b>Zero_TAlent_</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 7:56am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 6:52pm<b>TrustMeImADick</b> - the 04/07/2016 at 2:46pm<b>websphere69</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 10:44pm<b>apaton</b> - the 04/05/2016 at 5:54pm<b>MoxieJones</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 6:21pm

Fucked!<b>mrlucky22</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:20pm<b>patte</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 9:56pm<b>lambda</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 5:41am<b>Magnoxidans</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 3:50am<b>thomas5915</b> - the 04/02/2016 at 11:06am<b>Montiphelia</b> - the 02/11/2016 at 9:43pm<b>fmlnjd2013</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 1:56am<b>ladyofdeath13</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 3:13am<b>JusstJef</b> - the 01/20/2016 at 5:37pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/19/2016 at 5:15am<b>TexasDiesel97</b> - the 01/16/2016 at 4:02pm<b>_Peppermint_</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 7:21am<b>shaobi</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 7:17am<b>kemosabe4201</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 11:22am<b>Mons</b> - the 12/04/2015 at 2:25am<b>wanted_2_want</b> - the 11/30/2015 at 5:19am<b>tiredofwaiting</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 8:41pm<b>JMCJester69</b> - the 11/29/2015 at 6:29pm

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saruhhh's favorite FMLs

Today, I was home on leave and having breakfast with my parents and my younger brothers. I guess I got too used to the rougher language around the Army barracks where I'm stationed. At the breakfast table I asked my Mom to "pass me the f***ing butter". FML

by Anonymous / 05/14/2009 at 1:13pm / United States (Maine) / Miscellaneous

Today, one of my three-year-old twin daughters asked, "Dad, can we get a cat?" I replied in a gentle dad voice, "No, honey, dad is allergic to cats. That means they make him sneeze and sniffle. So we can't get a cat. Sorry." After a slight pause, the other asked, "When you die can we get a cat?" FML

by TwinDad / 05/14/2009 at 11:24am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Kids

Today, while working at a children's day camp, one of the kids who is allergic to peanuts went into anaphylactic shock. I ran and grabbed the boys eppe pen. I was holding it backwards so the injection went into my hand, causing me to pass out and both of us to be rushed to hospital. FML

by MC / 05/14/2009 at 10:11am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, my football club gave us all jerseys with our last names on them. My last name is 'Flicker'. The letters are all in uppercase. And the 'L' and the 'I' are joined together at the bottom. My jersey reads 'FUCKER'. FML

by Flicker / 05/14/2009 at 3:23am / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous

Today, I gave my 16 year old step daughter and her friends a lecture on respecting other people's privacy. Two hours later, I accidentally walked into her room without knocking. She and her friends were giving each other bikini waxes. Now her friends call me the hypocritical pervert. FML

by firewait / 05/12/2009 at 8:23pm / Canada (Ontario) / Kids

Today, I learned that I have carpal tunnel syndrome. I got it from playing too much World of Warcraft. I got a disease in real life by living in a virtual world. FML

by Loser / 05/12/2009 at 6:05pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I had all four of my wisdom teeth extracted. Under anesthesia I told the dentist my entire love life and drug history in detail. FML

by Anonymous / 05/12/2009 at 4:56pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I took a call. Wrong number. A few seconds later, they called back and I told her that she had the wrong number. She said she just hit redial and didn't understand how she got me again. I tried to explain how redial works. She called me a moron and hung up. Then my phone rang again. FML

by Anonymous / 05/12/2009 at 1:39pm / United States (Minnesota) / Work

Today, not wanting to be known as a lightweight anymore, I started drinking with some guy friends. After one beer I ended up in bed with one of them who kindly put my bra back on for me after, as I was too sloshed. I'm no longer known as lightweight, but instead, the slutty drunk. FML

by Permafucked / 05/12/2009 at 10:23am / United States (South Dakota) / Love

Today, I spent hours baking a multi-layered, detailed cake from scratch for my mom's birthday. It took two seconds for my dog to devour the cake while I picked up a spoon I dropped on the floor. FML

by babyboomerang / 05/12/2009 at 7:16am / United States (Florida) / Animals

Today, a friend and I went to Gamestop to pick up a game he wanted. I ended up buying a 17+ game, and I was prepared to show my license, but he stopped me an said, "I know you're 18". He then said, "Man, I've pretty much watched you grow up in this store." A game salesman watched me grow up. FML

Today, I walked into Best Buy to buy a 42" widescreen TV I'd been saving up for many months. As I walked in, a man stopped me and handed me my wallet that I'd accidentally dropped. I thanked him. 5 minutes later at the checkout, I opened up my wallet to realize it was empty. He had stolen everything. FML

by omgfmlhard / 05/11/2009 at 7:14pm / United States (Maine) / Money

Today, it's the five year anniversary of my father's death. I was cuddling with my boyfriend and crying about how much I missed him. He replied with, "Sometimes, I think you just like to hear yourself talk." FML

by bezoar10 / 05/11/2009 at 3:46pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was taking the AP Biology exam. It’s strictly timed, yet my proctor spent 30 minutes (a third of the time we have) talking about his sexual relationship with his wife, who was also proctoring. I don’t know how I did on the test, but I now know my proctor had erectile dysfunction. FML

by JSF1234 / 05/11/2009 at 1:07pm / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy

Today, I gave my wife a cat. The first thing it did when it got out of the box was scratch the sh*t out of my leg. Next, it ran up to my wife and purred. She said, "Good cat." FML

by prevostsrocklike / 05/11/2009 at 8:38am / United States (Tennessee) / Animals