Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

saruhhh

Offline (yesterday at 11:30pm) | Search for a member

saruhhh

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 July 1991 (23 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 7425
  • Number of comments : 2
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About saruhhh : i'm sarah. i live in michigan.

saruhhh's page activity

Visits<b>hulopro</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 4:36pm<b>MortenM</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 4:32pm<b>hellnosucka</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 2:52pm<b>Woofum</b> - the 12/05/2013 at 3:58pm<b>BlackPanther19</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 4:11pm<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 5:33pm<b>MikaykayUnicorn</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 11:20pm<b>Laxinitup</b> - the 08/14/2013 at 8:33pm<b>PterodactylMan</b> - the 08/06/2013 at 8:29am<b>lfrider92</b> - the 08/05/2013 at 9:43pm<b>michaelaranda</b> - the 07/24/2013 at 1:55am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 07/17/2013 at 10:26pm<b>mattlw</b> - the 05/30/2013 at 9:10pm<b>RenosShark</b> - the 05/15/2013 at 2:54pm<b>VannahJane</b> - the 02/02/2013 at 5:47pm<b>heroin</b> - the 06/19/2010 at 9:36am<b>sum1savemeh</b> - the 05/22/2010 at 5:01pm<b>Loosechange</b> - the 05/03/2010 at 7:33am

saruhhh's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of saruhhh's badges

saruhhh's favorite FMLs

Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML

#1292043
390 comments

I agree, your life sucks (73422) - you deserved it (8691)

On 04/24/2009 at 3:50pm - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Missouri)

Today, I didn't wear my contacts. Determined to prove to my friends I didn't need them, I read all the signs in sight. I couldn't read a particular one, so I began to walk closer. Suddenly I fell on my face, bruising my cheekbone. The sign said: "Caution: Watch Your Step." FML

#1248987
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11697) - you deserved it (58617)

On 04/23/2009 at 3:36am - misc - by notexactly (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I had a job interview. Everything was going really well until I noticed a bug on my interviewer's lower neck. I shouted that something really disgusting was crawling on him. It turns out it was his big hairy mole. FML

#1125126
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17799) - you deserved it (55543)

On 04/19/2009 at 5:52pm - work - by Crunchy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I went to get some teeth pulled. I had Novocaine in my gums and lip so I couldn't feel a thing. When the doctor is pulling out the last tooth, he sneezes and pulls the tooth out. He looks in my mouth and I hear, "Oh, shit..." I now have stitches in my mouth. FML

#1123097
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53412) - you deserved it (2128)

On 04/19/2009 at 4:48pm - health - by TT (man) - United States (Maryland)

Today, I discovered the worst possible situation in which to get explosive diarrhea: on a 9-hour transatlantic flight. Next to an attractive single guy. FML

#1094822
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64319) - you deserved it (3195)

On 04/18/2009 at 7:11pm - health - by crapgirl (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had a surgery to remove a cyst from my butt. Afterwards that doctor told me that the cyst was bigger than he initially thought, it would still secrete fluids for two weeks, and the best remedy for this was to wear a maxi-pad. I'm a guy, and am currently wearing a maxi-pad on my butt. FML

#1082247
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (99001) - you deserved it (5674)

On 04/18/2009 at 10:24am - health - by Ian (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I was petting my cat when my new mood ring turned bright purple. I checked the piece of paper that came with the ring and saw that purple meant I was feeling "hot, sexy, and passionate." According to my ring, I'm hot for my cat. FML

#1070820
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41715) - you deserved it (15368)

On 04/17/2009 at 10:32pm - intimacy - by shutupandsmile18 (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML

#1068348
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (153004) - you deserved it (8460)

On 04/17/2009 at 9:19pm - intimacy - by gringa_Peru (woman) - Peru (Lima)

Today, I swam in a race against all of the girls in the midwest in the hardest, longest, most grueling race you can swim. I won. Happy but so tired I could barely move, I looked up to see my time. I had been disqualified. For flinching. Before the race started. FML

#1054756
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76277) - you deserved it (5986)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I was in the supermarket and I see this little boy trying to reach for something on the top shelf. I go over to him and ask if his mom knows where he is. The boy turns around. He was actually a very angry midget. FML

#1054716
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28626) - you deserved it (51903)

On 04/17/2009 at 1:05pm - kids - by jules (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had to re-take an hour long MRI scan because I got an erection midway through. FML

#1051780
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67707) - you deserved it (15883)

On 04/17/2009 at 10:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I was driving home from school, when I saw this girl I like walking home. Trying to be polite, I pulled over and asked if she wanted a ride. After my offer, I was rejected as she said "No, I'm actually already home," and walked up the nearest driveway... MY driveway. FML

#1035901
294 comments

I agree, your life sucks (78344) - you deserved it (6178)

On 04/16/2009 at 9:16pm - love - by Kelavmeister (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was bored and decided it would be fun to pretend to be an undercover cop and pull over other cars. The first car I pulled over was a real undercover cop. FML

#1033363
308 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35718) - you deserved it (306241)

On 04/16/2009 at 8:19pm - misc - by tvaladie (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, for April fools I decided to set off the smoke detectors in my friend's apartment while he was sleeping and saran wrap the outside of his bedroom doorway so he would smack into it. Instead, he jumped out the window and broke his leg. FML

#748414
234 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18707) - you deserved it (110062)

On 04/01/2009 at 4:06pm - health - by nic (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my 8-year-old sister learned how to type her name into a phone using the number key-pad. I later found my phone on the kitchen counter with all my contacts under her name. FML

#740938
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61873) - you deserved it (9129)

On 04/01/2009 at 2:07am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Korrig'Anne's illustrated FML
  • So, have you ordered it? Have you got it? No? Yes? Do you know any idea of what I'm talking about? OK, for the normal people, I'm talking about the new iPhone 6. Apparently, it came out today. I'm not…

Friday 19 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: