Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sariannacanna

Search for a member

sariannacanna
  • Town/Country : Brooklyn, United States
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Monday 26 August 1996 (17 years)
  • Number of visits : 1392
  • Number of comments : 10
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

sariannacanna's last visitors

notapotatoBballHottie34oA_Fiasco

sariannacanna's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

See all of sariannacanna's badges

sariannacanna's favorite FMLs

Today, I was trying to get my boyfriend in the mood so I held his hands against the bed, and whispered, "Have you been a bad boy?" Thinking he'd say something kinky back, he replied "Yes Santa" then burst out laughing. FML

#18134142
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27049) - you deserved it (13334)

On 11/01/2011 at 10:36pm - intimacy - by HOe HOe HOe (woman) - United States (Hawaii)

Today, my girlfriend tried to change her pad while we were sitting in a crowded movie theatre. She succeeded and slipped the used pad into her purse. I can't get rid of the memory, and I don't think I can ever eat popcorn again. FML

#18120358
591 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56327) - you deserved it (4484)

On 10/31/2011 at 11:38am - intimacy - by ohdear (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I punched myself in the face while trying to eat a GoGurt. FML

#18112620
309 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22565) - you deserved it (15016)

On 10/30/2011 at 4:15pm - misc - by yum yogurt - United States (Kentucky)

Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML

#18108392
252 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37628) - you deserved it (21775)

On 10/30/2011 at 1:31am - intimacy - by Korisite - United States

Today, my dad walked in on me masturbating. All I could say was, "Uh I had an itch..." FML

#18100630
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15994) - you deserved it (29440)

On 10/29/2011 at 12:43am - intimacy - by me - United States (New Jersey)

Today, while dancing at my studio, our instructor was giving us all characters opposite of ourselves to portray in an improv solo. My friends got cool things like "creepy" and "vulnerable". I got "extremely sexy". FML

#18085773
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23698) - you deserved it (3182)

On 10/27/2011 at 12:00am - misc - by apparentlyunsexy - United States (Texas)

Today, one of the children at my daycare came up to me and bit me on the face. He laughed so hard at my scream, that he threw up in my lap. FML

#18072283
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31404) - you deserved it (2623)

On 10/25/2011 at 2:04pm - kids - by mew - Canada

Today, my roomie had guests over. I didn't feel like socializing, but I really had to piss. So I pissed in the plant in my room, spilled half of it, mopped it up with an old shirt, and went to bed. FML

#18036176
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6448) - you deserved it (46943)

On 10/21/2011 at 12:57am - misc - by crankg - United States (Ohio)

Today, my eleven year old sister came in, and bitched to me and my boyfriend about how she was going to tell my mom about the used condom she found. My boyfriend punched her in the face. FML

#18022495
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46808) - you deserved it (14935)

On 10/19/2011 at 10:37am - intimacy - by lolilovemyboyfriend (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, at my job in the cosmetics department, I was helping a customer find something to her taste. She said, "I want a lipstick like you. Something that says, 'I'm a bitch'." FML

#17999888
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28614) - you deserved it (5646) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 10/16/2011 at 5:08pm - work - by Mayabie - France

Today, I went shopping with my mom. I went into my department and tried on some clothes. After a few minutes, there is an announcement that a child has gone missing. Staff are searching the store. I see my mom and she hugs me in tears and yells, "I found her!" I'm almost 17. FML

#17986846
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33769) - you deserved it (2863)

On 10/15/2011 at 1:13am - misc - by Ania (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, after getting dumped by my boyfriend, I tried to find comfort in one of my closest friends. He embraced me while I struggled against tears, and after a few moments of silence said, "Hey, you know what? I would fuck you anytime. Anytime." FML

#17973250
168 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31389) - you deserved it (8856)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:19am - intimacy - by scewable (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I let a guy I like look at my phone. A second later I remembered I had a secret copy of his Facebook profile picture on there to show a friend what he looked like. I was forced to tackle him to get my phone back. FML

#17940122
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10326) - you deserved it (34219)

On 10/09/2011 at 1:17am - love - by Emily S - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I learned the hard way that your little brother is not joking when he threatens to shave your eyebrows if you don't let him watch cartoons. FML

#17939452
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21309) - you deserved it (4680)

On 10/08/2011 at 11:53pm - kids - by hairless - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I was play-wrestling with my girlfriend. I ended up with a cut, three bruises on my arm and a black eye. She just giggled the entire time. FML

#17938205
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10580) - you deserved it (21793)

On 10/08/2011 at 9:20pm - health - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: