sarcasmOffended

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sarcasmOffended

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1345
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About sarcasmOffended : Message me if you atleast like ONE of my interests:

Karneval
Homestuck
Block B
QuestionableContent
Naruto
Aoharaido
Drawing
Editing
Sims2

sarcasmOffended's page activity

Visits<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 8:55pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 6:29pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 8:01pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 10:59pm<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 11:38am<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 10:57pm<b>aaronyetter</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 9:42pm<b>legendofizzy</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 8:53am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:55pm<b>Miku01</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 7:27am<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 10:23pm<b>therosh</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 8:40pm<b>rach0545</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 10:44pm<b>justindrew14</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 3:22pm<b>A07</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 12:34am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 7:51pm<b>AliceLiddel</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 4:15pm<b>Denny1</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 12:27pm

sarcasmOffended's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

See all of sarcasmOffended's badges

sarcasmOffended's favorite FMLs

Today, the regional manager of my company came out to do some performance reviews. I was so nervous that my palms were sweaty, and when he reached out to shake my hand, I blurted out, "I'm sorry, you made me wet." FML

by Anonymous / 05/13/2013 at 8:01am / Australia (Queensland) / Work

Today, I agreed to help out my 4-year crush with his senior prank which is to pretend we are dating for 1 day to freak everyone out. Glad to know dating me is prank worthy. FML

by turdtonomor9 / 05/12/2013 at 10:08am / United States / Love

Today, my little brothers wouldn't stop teasing me over the fact that I'm a virgin and they are not. They are 13 and 16, I'm 22. What's worse? My dad quickly joined them. FML

by lamsolonely / 05/12/2013 at 12:35am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend woke me up the same way he always does, by pulling on my hair. Just to be playful, I pulled him down on top of me and kissed him. Turns out his brother thought it would be funny to wake people up the same way. FML

by wrongguy / 05/11/2013 at 7:04pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I cancelled our date tonight. I cancelled because I had a seizure and was taken to the hospital. FML

by Chia / 05/10/2013 at 6:58pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, I decided to end things with my boyfriend, thinking it would be fine since things have never been at all serious between us. He cried for hours before having his grandmother text me to say how heartless I am. FML

by Anonymous / 05/10/2013 at 12:48pm / Norway / Love

Today, at work, I was trying to get the octopus out of its tank to transfer it to another one. It instantly latched to my face and sprayed ink all over me. My boss told me to stop playing with the animals. FML

by FenRackety / 05/10/2013 at 8:37am / Canada / Animals

Today, I was questioned by police for forcing a 12-year-old to get in my car. That 12-year-old is my daughter, who refused to get in until I agree to buy her a highly expensive purse just to become popular. FML

by brokedad / 05/09/2013 at 9:41pm / United States / Kids

Today, I went to therapy. I started talking about my childhood and my life. By the time the session was over my therapist was crying. FML

by Screwed Up / 05/09/2013 at 1:30am / United States / Health

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 7 years with another woman. He panicked and blamed it on the "long distance" and how we "never see each other". We've lived in the same neighbourhood since we were 5 years old, and we've lived together for the past four years. FML

Today, I walked in on my boyfriend of 7 years with another woman. He panicked and blamed it on the "long distance" and how we "never see each other". We've lived in the same neighbourhood since we were 5 years old, and we've lived together for the past four years. FML

Today, I was in a bathroom stall and I accidentally dropped my new tampon on the ground. Just as I was about to reach for it, I heard a voice on the other side of the stall say, "Oh great, I needed that" and then a hand reached under my stall and grabbed it. It was my last one. FML

by the girl next door / 05/07/2013 at 1:10am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous

Today, I tried to "trip" and fall into this guy I've had a crush on. I missed and fell on my face. He stepped over me and kept walking. FML

by clumsy / 05/06/2013 at 8:45pm / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

by SkeetinKeaton / 05/06/2013 at 2:29am / United States / Kids

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

by me / 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm / United States (Texas) / Kids