sarcasmOffended

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sarcasmOffended

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1272
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 3 posted

About sarcasmOffended : Message me if you atleast like ONE of my interests:

Karneval
Homestuck
Block B
QuestionableContent
Naruto
Aoharaido
Drawing
Editing
Sims2

sarcasmOffended's page activity

Visits<b>MissJennyale</b> - the 06/04/2015 at 8:55pm<b>jonnyscash</b> - the 03/13/2014 at 6:29pm<b>badmandilon</b> - the 11/26/2013 at 8:01pm<b>k_gils</b> - the 11/06/2013 at 10:59pm<b>Gentelman999</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 11:38am<b>Trollx</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 10:57pm<b>aaronyetter</b> - the 10/20/2013 at 9:42pm<b>legendofizzy</b> - the 10/16/2013 at 8:53am<b>iHiccupBS</b> - the 10/13/2013 at 10:55pm<b>Miku01</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 7:27am<b>OmgitsJay</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 10:23pm<b>therosh</b> - the 10/11/2013 at 8:40pm<b>rach0545</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 10:44pm<b>justindrew14</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 3:22pm<b>A07</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 12:34am<b>Pleonasm</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 7:51pm<b>AliceLiddel</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 4:15pm<b>Denny1</b> - the 10/09/2013 at 12:27pm

sarcasmOffended's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I agree, their lives suck

200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.

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sarcasmOffended's favorite FMLs

Today, my girlfriend had someone else dump me via text message. I knew it wasn't her because for once I wasn't being viciously insulted, and it wasn't written as if an illiterate baboon had taken a shit all over her keypad. I can't even feel happy about being rid of her. FML

by yesguysgetabusedtoo / 05/24/2013 at 7:42pm / New Zealand (Auckland) / Love

Today, a package was delivered to my house, addressed to me, clearly marked "sexual health products". Inside were condoms, birth control pills, and an invoice made out to me. My parents went ballistic and grounded me. Whoever staged this "hilarious" prank: well played, asshole. FML

by Anonymous / 05/24/2013 at 5:43pm / Iceland (Eyjafjardarsysla) / Intimacy

Today, my friends and I were talking about the creepy stranger that used to stalk me back in high school. I guess his looks changed a lot through the years because I found out that he's my current boyfriend of 4 months. FML

by datgirl92 / 05/24/2013 at 10:00am / Canada (Ontario) / Love

Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML

by obnum / 05/24/2013 at 8:26am / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML

by a single fuck / 05/23/2013 at 12:40pm / Germany (Berlin) / Love

Today, one of my closest friends informed me that she wasn't going to invite me to her wedding, because I'm too shy and not enough fun, and she doesn't want her 200 or so guests to feel uncomfortable. I was the one who set the happy couple up. FML

by Anonymous / 05/23/2013 at 9:45am / Australia (Queensland) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was out on a family walk, when I overheard two women talking to each other. One of them was wondering how a kid with such good looking parents and grandparents could be so ugly. That kid is my daughter. FML

by Kittykat900 / 05/22/2013 at 12:47pm / United Kingdom (York) / Kids

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I thought the public restroom I was in was empty, so I started rapping. I realized the room was not empty when, recognizing the song, the person one stall over joined in. FML

by crappingrapping / 05/21/2013 at 11:01am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my husband making out with his accountant, the same woman who comforted me when he cheated on me the year before. FML

by Anonymous / 05/20/2013 at 4:36pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, my allergies started up with a vengeance. Yesterday I broke 4 ribs and fractured my sternum. Every time I sneeze, I swear I can feel the broken bones move around. FML

by KatielSilver / 05/20/2013 at 1:44am / United States (Washington) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my wife gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. She's perfect in every way, except for her birth mark. It's under the corner of her left eye and looks almost exactly like a prison teardrop tattoo. FML

by Anonymous / 05/19/2013 at 2:33pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids

Today, I woke up and went into my living room, only to be greeted by my aunt, sister, and mother watching a very graphic video showing women giving birth. They forced me to stay and watch it until the end. It was almost 90 minutes. FML

by dafuqdidisee / 05/19/2013 at 2:30am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was roasting marshmallows around a campfire when mine burst into flames. I instinctively shook the stick to get it to go out. The flaming marshmallow then catapulted straight into my eye, burning my whole eyelid. FML

by Devin / 05/19/2013 at 1:26am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, while at hospital with a broken arm, I was asked to raise my hand onto the x-ray machine. I told the nurse I couldn't move it without extreme pain. She told me to suck it up, picked up my arm, and dropped it on the machine. I could feel the bone completely separate. FML

by mackmackey / 05/18/2013 at 7:15pm / United States (Arizona) / Health

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I told my dad that I broke up with my first serious girlfriend. He responded by blaring sad breakup songs as loud as he could throughout the house, just to see me "cry like a bitch". FML

by SteroidPenguin / 05/18/2013 at 6:33pm / United States (Colorado) / Love