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sarahlou93's FML badges
You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
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sarahlou93's favorite FMLs
by Paige / 07/10/2013 at 10:18am / United Kingdom (Essex) / Love
Today, I took my girlfriend to a family dinner. Things went great, until my grandma arrived. She thought it would be okay to continue our friendly prank war by congratulating me on my "wife's" pregnancy. My girlfriend actually believed it, and now thinks she's the "other woman". FML
by paging dr. kevorkian / 05/16/2013 at 5:23pm / Netherlands / Love
Today, four days after our fridge-freezer broke down, my husband staggered home with three bags of ham. He drunkenly bought it with most of what little money we have, so now not only is our food budget gone, we also have a metric cunt-load of ham, and nowhere to store it. FML
by meetrasan / 03/17/2013 at 8:01pm / Money
Today, after a long work shift, I was so tired that I took a nap in my car to avoid driving half-asleep. When I awoke, there was a huge truck in front of me. I thought I'd fallen asleep while driving and was about to die. I only realized it was stationary after I pissed myself. FML
by FUCKKKS / 03/03/2013 at 12:37pm / United States / Transportation
by Anonymous / 03/01/2013 at 2:18am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, I introduced my girlfriend to my parents. The first thing my dad did was comment that given how pretty she looked in our photos, and compared to how she looks in real life, she's amazing at using Photoshop. FML
by dpap / 01/18/2013 at 6:03pm / United States (Iowa) / Love
Today, my wife and I had a fight, which I thought we resolved. Later, while painting the kitchen, I told her to change into an old shirt she didn't care about. She made a huge show of putting her wedding gown on, veil and all. FML
by Anonymous / 01/01/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Georgia) / Love
Today, I found out that my six year old cousin has a raging crush on my boyfriend. She lives across the street and watches from her window for his car to appear in front of my house. She's indicated that she'll stop at nothing until he's hers. FML
by yoggabe / 08/18/2012 at 4:34pm / Mexico (Tabasco) / Kids
Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given them. The list is in chronological order. She's not only not the highest rated, she's not last on the list. FML
by Anonymous / 08/16/2012 at 3:36pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 08/13/2012 at 2:48pm / United Kingdom (York) / Intimacy
by JukeboxValkyrie / 02/16/2012 at 2:52am / United States (Florida) / Animals
Today, already knowing that my girlfriend wanted to be "just friends", I invited her over, hoping to change her mind. She was playfully drawing on me with a pen when I noticed she'd written "Emily's property" on my leg. I said "Aw, I'm yours?" She then drew a for-sale sign on me. FML
by John / 07/20/2011 at 12:38pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
by WhatTheBleep / 04/09/2011 at 12:02am / United States (New Hampshire) / Love
by smiles22 / 11/27/2010 at 1:38am / United States / Love
- Today, while having sex with my husband, we had to move around our cat during position changes. Our… Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up… Today, I was playing my guitar outside my apartment building, and some people had put some money in…