Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

sarahalyssa

Search for a member

sarahalyssa
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 March 1991 (23 years)
  • Number of visits : 974
  • Number of comments : 12
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 4 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

sarahalyssa's last visitors

alexmac222

sarahalyssa's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sarahalyssa's favorite FMLs

Today, I found out that the blind man I've been helping for months at the grocery store by carrying his shopping around and stuff was actually faking his blindness. FML

#13442719
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24222) - you deserved it (3172)

On 10/14/2010 at 4:19am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my dad walked in on me singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", while spinning in circles with the cat in my arms. I thought I was home alone. FML

#12797830
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11200) - you deserved it (24426)

On 08/29/2010 at 12:54am - animals - by Hobbsie - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got a parking ticket while standing beside my car. FML

#12183114
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25198) - you deserved it (8222)

On 07/29/2010 at 6:56am - misc - by Andre - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was cutting the grass on my riding mower. I spent a good 3 hours working on it. When I finished, I got off and went to take a look. It looked the same as when I started. I then realized that I hadn't lowered the mower part. I spent 3 hours just driving around. FML

#11986372
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15410) - you deserved it (58187)

On 07/19/2010 at 4:48pm - misc - by Dumbfounded - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was proposed to in a McDonald's. FML

#9127255
442 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55672) - you deserved it (13026)

On 03/16/2010 at 6:55am - love - by hater -

Today, while waiting at the bus stop, the guy standing near me started peeing on the sidewalk and on my shoes. FML

#9077392
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17680) - you deserved it (1515)

On 03/14/2010 at 4:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, I walked into a subway car which was empty except for this sleeping hobo. Three stops later, the guy wakes up and starts peeing in the corner. I ignore it thinking he'll go back to sleep. Silly me, I didn't realize that he would start running towards me, still peeing. FML

#8938594
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24914) - you deserved it (2116)

On 03/09/2010 at 1:31am - misc - by CreepedOut (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up to the most awkward breakfast of my life. Apparently, last night after taking my sleeping pill, I went into my mom's room and started spilling secrets left and right. Secrets about my current crush, the people I've hooked up with, and how when I say I'm going over to my friend Beth's house, I'm really seeing a guy. FML

#8916810
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9795) - you deserved it (28342)

On 03/08/2010 at 10:14am - love - by xXxtwilightLUV95xXx - United States (Texas)

Today, I saw my crush standing at the bus stop. I did the "I'm talking to someone on the phone thing," trying to be cool. Halfway through the conversation my phone actually rang, I quickly answered but it was my mom on loudspeaker yelling, "Did you bring your tampons?" FML

#8472938
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7858) - you deserved it (25850)

On 02/20/2010 at 8:58am - misc - by Rach (woman) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my grandmother decided to tell me about her past as a prostitute. In full detail. FML

#8365042
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16532) - you deserved it (1626)

On 02/17/2010 at 1:40am - intimacy - by thatssickkk - United States (California)

Today, I was at the theatre watching a movie. There was a lady and a kid behind me. I all of a sudden felt ice hit my head. I turned around and asked the kid to stop, then heard his mom say, "Hit that cow!" FML

#7962696
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24041) - you deserved it (2184)

On 02/07/2010 at 2:21am - misc - by HitbyIce (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, at my school, the student council is trying to raise $5000 for Haiti. They are doing so by playing the song from High School Musical in the hallways and cafeteria everyday until they get the money. FML

#7603599
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35087) - you deserved it (3617)

On 01/27/2010 at 12:07am - misc - by evil - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I was picking up my little sister from school and while waiting I decided to have a smoke. I was caught and was told to go to the principal's office. I'm 23. FML

#7508111
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10448) - you deserved it (17146)

On 01/22/2010 at 9:10pm - misc - by oldschool (man) - United States (California)

Today, I realized that the only boy that shows up at my door is the pizza boy. FML

#7399621
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21773) - you deserved it (6399)

On 01/17/2010 at 2:24pm - love - by mapleleafs34 (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I found my beloved hamster, Toofie. Toofie escaped from his cage. 4 years ago. FML

#7380973
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26508) - you deserved it (3432)

On 01/16/2010 at 4:36pm - animals - by riptoofie (woman) - United States (Nevada)



FML's blog

  • Zoé's Illustrated FML
  • Hey there, young whippersnappers. Yes, you, the youth. I’m talking to you, sitting at home, scratching your asses. Why aren’t you doing something more constructive with your lives? Stop watching that shit…

Friday 18 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: