sarabellum93

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sarabellum93

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2508
  • Number of comments : 8
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 13 posted

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sarabellum93's page activity

Visits<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/03/2015 at 11:49pm<b>RobotUnicorn1209</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:05pm<b>Mindset</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 1:59am<b></b> - the 03/10/2011 at 2:40am<b>Julietta</b> - the 10/29/2010 at 3:49am

Fucked!<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 07/04/2015 at 5:49am

sarabellum93's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

sarabellum93's favorite FMLs

Today, I noticed my kitten was growling and twitching in his sleep. I tried to wake him up by gently prodding him. He responded by waking up and attacking my face. FML

by meowmeow / 09/21/2010 at 12:38am / Australia / Health

Today, my job application for McDonald's was rejected. This is the second time. FML

by Anonymous / 09/20/2010 at 3:10am / United Kingdom (Hampshire) / Work

Today, I was late to a sold out movie in the theater, so I had to shuffle in during the previews in the dark. I sat down in what I thought was the last vacant seat, but I'd really just sat in a small woman's lap. She was not happy. FML

by Anonymous / 09/13/2010 at 4:52pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

by Username / 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm / Kids

Today, I got out our electric fan because it was very hot. A cockroach crawled up behind the frame on the fan and fell into the gap of the frame. It got itself killed by the rotating fan, and had its blended flesh sent flying all over my white polo shirt. FML

by roachblend / 09/12/2010 at 4:00am / Taiwan (T'ai-pei) / Animals

Today, I went to a zoo that had a gorilla in a cage. I walked up, and the gorilla stopped what he was doing, looked me in the eyes, and started jacking off. FML

by gorillalove / 09/11/2010 at 3:25pm / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a school football game alone. I sat next to these hot girls. To seem cool, I picked up my phone and had a fake conversation with the coolest guy in the grade. Halfway through, he came over and talked to the girls. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2010 at 12:01am / United States (Tennessee) / Miscellaneous

Today, my cousin came to visit from America. While out shopping, she said loudly that she was having trouble finding clothes to fit around her huge fanny, causing a lot of people to stare in our direction. I had to explain to her that "fanny" in the UK means "vagina." FML

by Anonymous / 09/09/2010 at 10:00am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, a little girl asked me how I could be so fat and still have small boobs. Great question. FML

by Lauren / 09/08/2010 at 7:13pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, a little girl asked me how I could be so fat and still have small boobs. Great question. FML

by Lauren / 09/08/2010 at 7:13pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Health

Today, after being with my boyfriend for seven years, he finally proposed. To another woman. FML

by onthemarket / 09/08/2010 at 3:46pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Love

Today, my mum thought it would be acceptable to tell my school that the reason I will not be attending classes is because I have "the shits." FML

by Anonymous / 09/08/2010 at 7:24am / United Kingdom (Gloucestershire) / Health

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

by dom / 09/08/2010 at 2:53am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

by dom / 09/08/2010 at 2:53am / United States / Intimacy

Today, my boyfriend yawned while I was giving him head. FML

by dom / 09/08/2010 at 2:53am / United States / Intimacy