About samtheman66 : I am a professional rock climber!
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samtheman66's favorite FMLs
Today, my grandpa told me what he'd do if he was president. I sat there for 30 minutes listening to how he'd get rid of prisons, send all the prisoners to a desert for 5 years and give them a gun to fight over. And then he'd surgically attach child molesters' penises to their foreheads. FML
by Andrew / 08/23/2011 at 10:46am / United States / Intimacy
by cek4uytp / 06/25/2011 at 2:02am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was reading a crappy "How to spice up your marriage" book with my husband for laughs. One of the ideas was for the guy to whip his knob out, stand behind his girl and say "Can you say that into the microphone?" Now he does it every chance he gets, and I fall for it EVERY TIME. FML
by Kate / 06/07/2011 at 3:50am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was driving back home with my mom when we saw two squirrels having sex in the road. I told her to just honk the horn. She said that I was being selfish, that sex is a beautiful thing, and that we should let them finish. We sat there for at least five minutes. FML
by squirrels69ing / 05/21/2011 at 9:00pm / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by nomorexbox / 04/26/2011 at 3:20pm / United States (Georgia) / Geek
by CheeseyPotatoes / 04/11/2011 at 9:16am / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by omg / 03/24/2011 at 8:43pm / Canada (Alberta) / Kids
by phantomdriver / 03/24/2011 at 6:51pm / Canada (Alberta) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 02/04/2011 at 12:42am / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/29/2011 at 3:09am / France / Animals
by Anonymous / 12/07/2010 at 11:09am / Guatemala (Guatemala) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 11/23/2010 at 9:37pm / Canada / Miscellaneous
Today, my brother and his friend ambushed me, tied me to a chair, and put a sock in my mouth. My mom found me 10 minutes later, took the sock out, and asked, "Why are you tied to a chair?" I told her what happened. She looked at me, laughed, stuffed the sock back in my mouth, and left. FML
by boundandgagged / 01/13/2010 at 2:36pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's… 2Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 3Today, it's been 2 weeks since I ordered a printer so I could print schoolwork, that way I don't…