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sammilala22's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 09/27/2013 at 4:33pm / United States (Texas) / Love
Today, while waxing my bikini line, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me which caused me to close my legs. I am now sitting in the sink with my best friend pouring hot water "down there" trying to remove the wax. FML
by helpme / 07/15/2013 at 1:25pm / Canada (Ontario) / Transportation
by leeceetaylor99 / 07/15/2013 at 12:47pm / United States (Texas) / Love
by lilly1105 / 07/15/2013 at 9:19am / United States (South Carolina) / Intimacy
Today, the guy I like asked me what he should do for the girl he has a crush on. I told him to give her flowers and tell her how he feels. Later that day my doorbell rang, and he stood there holding flowers. He said the magical words, "My car broke down, can you give me a lift?" FML
by Stacy / 07/13/2013 at 12:22am / United States / Love
Today, I woke up with horrible pain in my gut. It got worse and worse, and I started vomiting from the pain. My mom said it was flu and that I needed to "man up." It turned out to be appendicitis, and I'm now typing this from my hospital bed. FML
by Anonymous / 07/12/2013 at 1:28pm / United States (California) / Health
Today, my girlfriend decided to let me know that she almost left me for another guy not so long ago, because he was more handsome and talented than me. The reason she didn't leave: "He's out of my league; you're not." FML
by Anonymous / 07/12/2013 at 12:53pm / United States / Love
by ouch / 07/12/2013 at 3:22am / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, my 15-year-old daughter's pregnancy test came back positive. I wanted to know who the father is, so I could sit the two of them down to talk the situation through with them. She isn't sure if it's her best friend, or our neighbor's son. FML
by Anonymous / 07/12/2013 at 1:19am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I let my 3-year-old daughter watch Finding Nemo on my phone while I made her lunch. I returned to find she had dropped my phone into the fish bowl so that her goldfish could see his friends. FML
by thanks, Nemo. / 07/11/2013 at 7:13pm / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
by yayme. / 07/11/2013 at 6:26pm / United States (North Dakota) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 1:08pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, my 13-year-old daughter and I went to a tropical themed restaurant. She wanted a strawberry Daiquiri, so I asked the waitress for a virgin strawberry Daiquiri. My daughter then said, "But dad, I'm not a virgin." FML
by Anonymous / 07/11/2013 at 10:24am / United States / Intimacy
by my honest father / 07/10/2013 at 12:33pm / United States (Kansas) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, someone stole my purse and phone while I was giving CPR to someone who had a heart attack on… 2Today, my boyfriend said I didn't give him enough attention because of my busy work life. So… he… 3Today, I was making the daily commute to work when suddenly my mother calls me, crying that there's…