Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

salvorican

Online | Search for a member

salvorican

12Liked!

salvoricansalvorican
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4017
  • Number of comments : 253
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About salvorican : I hate description boxes.
1. Because I never know what to say about me.
2. I always choose something stupid to say.
3. I'm going to write shit anyway.

My life is literally work, the boyfriend, and my puppy Ryuu.
Ponies are freaking adorable.
Supernatural is love.
Skyrim is life.
Anime is everything.
House MD has changed me forever.
Horror is my obsession.
Pokemon taught me skill.
Video games made me who I am.

salvorican's page activity

Visits<b>Cortezthe1st</b> - 16 hours ago<b>brndnmcmillan</b> - yesterday at 7:42am<b>Drag0nb0rn</b> - yesterday at 7:34am<b>Acerhawk</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 7:02pm<b>Ahsome</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 12:19pm<b>asteinmetz</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 11:59pm<b>Colorcoded</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 10:09pm<b>IceCreamMage</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 5:23pm<b>kingofthediamond</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 1:39am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 8:43am<b>DHoang22</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 3:49am<b>ThePols</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:42am<b>blcksocks</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 3:32pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 1:12pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 4:29am<b>RMLrapemylife</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 4:14am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 3:45am<b>fml0505</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:26am

Liked!<b>kingofthediamond</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 7:39am<b>fml0505</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 8:27am<b>kspear2</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 12:37am<b>HanuRohilla</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 12:57pm<b>Ardenor13</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 8:06pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:49am<b>kunal222</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:35pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 4:49pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:29pm<b>phew</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 7:21pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 4:27am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:18am

salvorican's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of salvorican's badges

salvorican's favorite FMLs

Today, I had a graded performance in my drama class. I had to play a murderer in an interrogation room. I got really into it and started pounding on the windows to try to "escape". The thin glass smashed. Four hours in casualty, stitches and plastic surgery pretty much sum up my mood. FML

#17757780
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21947) - you deserved it (8498)

On 09/16/2011 at 1:18pm - health - by anonymous - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I had a graded performance in my drama class. I had to play a murderer in an interrogation room. I got really into it and started pounding on the windows to try to "escape". The thin glass smashed. Four hours in casualty, stitches and plastic surgery pretty much sum up my mood. FML

#17757780
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21947) - you deserved it (8498)

On 09/16/2011 at 1:18pm - health - by anonymous - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my girlfriend called me over to her house. When I knocked, no one responded to the door. I decided to check the back yard and found her sunbathing by the pool. I kneeled by her and placed my hand on her butt, kissing her neck. What I heard next, "So this is what you do with my daughter." FML

#17753266
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36259) - you deserved it (23326)

On 09/15/2011 at 7:54pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I finished the first month of a diet and exercise program designed to help me lose weight. To keep myself motivated, I have avoided the scale the entire time. I weighed myself today. I've gained 6 pounds. FML

#17744289
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26297) - you deserved it (5277)

On 09/14/2011 at 2:21pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I finished the first month of a diet and exercise program designed to help me lose weight. To keep myself motivated, I have avoided the scale the entire time. I weighed myself today. I've gained 6 pounds. FML

#17744289
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26297) - you deserved it (5277)

On 09/14/2011 at 2:21pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend proposed by painting his chest with "marry me?" and an arrow going down. The ring was attached to his penis with a string. FML

#17743940
292 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41548) - you deserved it (6223)

On 09/14/2011 at 12:59pm - intimacy - by ohmaigawd (woman) - Argentina

Today, my parents came to my house for my birthday. My mom backed her car into my motorcycle, knocking it over. She said because it was my birthday I could pay for the damages to her car later. FML

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

#17737717
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28047) - you deserved it (11487)

On 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm - misc - by unicorn - United States (Georgia)

Today, after being cut out of the car, on the way to hospital in the ambulance, we were involved in another accident. FML

#17736251
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34008) - you deserved it (1979)

On 09/13/2011 at 1:07pm - health - by skitzobiatch69 - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I was talking to my ex. After pouring my heart out to her, saying we were meant for each other, she looked at me and said, "Don't bother, I've already slept with your brother." FML

#17725319
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37776) - you deserved it (4763)

On 09/12/2011 at 12:53am - intimacy - by MTJY - United Kingdom

Today, the girl I've been dating, and starting to fall in love with, walked out of the bathroom claiming we were going to be parents. I jumped off of the couch in disbelief, yelling, "Really?" She replied, "Really. I just gave birth to a huge dump baby." FML

#17718767
350 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39330) - you deserved it (7096)

On 09/11/2011 at 11:13am - misc - by CaseyFpC85 - United States (Florida)

Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML

#17709124
583 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20933) - you deserved it (237647)

On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, desperate after a very painful breakup, I poured my heart and soul out to my old teddy bear. When I finished, I asked what he would do in my situation. Right on cue, a gust of wind came through the window and sent him falling off the windowsill and crashing head-first onto the floor. FML

#17706108
207 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35036) - you deserved it (6143) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 09/09/2011 at 7:18pm - love - by Angie - France

Today, I picked up a lady's dropped wallet and chased after her despite my sprained ankle. When I finally caught up with her, she smashed her chili sauce filled hotdog across my face and kicked me in the groin, accusing me of stealing her wallet. I was kept at the police station for 3 hours. FML

#17681011
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33743) - you deserved it (2400)

On 09/06/2011 at 3:40pm - misc - by fmlsrslyahhh - Singapore

Today, I checked the camera I set up to find out who has been stealing my prescription painkillers: my wife, my daughter or my son. Turns out they all are. FML

#17672828
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28766) - you deserved it (2670)

On 09/05/2011 at 5:37pm - health - by oxymorons - United States (Arizona)



FML's blog

  • FML's Thanksgiving Special: TGS
  • As many of us know through popular culture, today is Thanksgiving in the US. Come on, we’ve all seen a TV show involving a Thanksgiving dinner or plans to do so that have gone awry due to one of the main…

Wednesday 26 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: