Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

salvorican

Offline (the 11/10/2014 at 4:05pm) | Search for a member

salvorican

12Liked!

salvoricansalvorican
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3985
  • Number of comments : 253
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About salvorican : I hate description boxes.
1. Because I never know what to say about me.
2. I always choose something stupid to say.
3. I'm going to write shit anyway.

My life is literally work, the boyfriend, and my puppy Ryuu.
Ponies are freaking adorable.
Supernatural is love.
Skyrim is life.
Anime is everything.
House MD has changed me forever.
Horror is my obsession.
Pokemon taught me skill.
Video games made me who I am.

salvorican's page activity

Visits<b>Acerhawk</b> - the 11/21/2014 at 7:02pm<b>Ahsome</b> - the 11/15/2014 at 12:19pm<b>asteinmetz</b> - the 11/12/2014 at 11:59pm<b>Colorcoded</b> - the 11/11/2014 at 10:09pm<b>IceCreamMage</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 5:23pm<b>kingofthediamond</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 1:39am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 8:43am<b>DHoang22</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 3:49am<b>ThePols</b> - the 11/08/2014 at 1:42am<b>blcksocks</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 3:32pm<b>pantherfan0877</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 1:12pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 4:29am<b>RMLrapemylife</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 4:14am<b>MzZombicidal</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 3:45am<b>fml0505</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:26am<b>Greg1986</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 2:19am<b>Bulldozer36</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 1:58am<b>devildog562</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 1:48am

Liked!<b>kingofthediamond</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 7:39am<b>fml0505</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 8:27am<b>kspear2</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 12:37am<b>HanuRohilla</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 12:57pm<b>Ardenor13</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 8:06pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:49am<b>kunal222</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:35pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 4:49pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:29pm<b>phew</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 7:21pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 4:27am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:18am

salvorican's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of salvorican's badges

salvorican's favorite FMLs

Today, I went to a coworker's wedding. Instead of getting to celebrate their marriage, we spent most of the service being lectured by the priest on how women are a freak by-product of "God's masterpiece design" and are the cause of all the world's problems. FML

#21233096
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35964) - you deserved it (3096)

On 08/09/2014 at 4:56am - misc - by Anonymous - Malawi

Today, I let my coworker use my PC during lunch, because his was having problems. A few hours later, my boss called me into his office and gave me hell for apparently looking at furry porn during lunch break. He won't believe my explanation. For fuck's sake, Dave. FML

Today, I wore a tank top for the first time in a few years. It turned out even worse than the last time. I got insulted by several people over my "Never say never" upper chest tattoo, which I got years ago, before the words ever became associated with a certain douchy Canadian pop "singer". FML

#21230914
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42196) - you deserved it (9152)

On 08/06/2014 at 12:45pm - misc - by beaverfever (man) - Poland (Zachodniopomorskie)

Today, I found out the hard way that no good girlfriend-boyfriend conversation ever started with, "Suppose I slept with your best friend..." FML

#21229506
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40000) - you deserved it (8312)

On 08/04/2014 at 7:04pm - love - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, at work, an old man was having trouble using his credit card at the checkout. I told him to "just stick it in", and he replied with "I love it when you talk dirty to me." The whole line at the checkout laughed. FML

#21228111
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49158) - you deserved it (21251)

On 08/03/2014 at 1:16am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I had trouble carrying a box upstairs because my arms were sore from working out. My mom asked me, "Why are you working out so much then?" I didn't have the heart to tell her it was because of her 100-pound weight gain and that I didn't want to end up looking like her. FML

#21225648
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40436) - you deserved it (6496)

On 07/31/2014 at 7:51am - health - by jogginglikeitsmyjob (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was at the beach with a group of friends, including the guy I like. As soon as we got to the beach, I ran toward the water and he chased after me. It was a beautiful moment until I looked back at him, tripped, fell on my face and slid down the beach. FML

#21224233
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38613) - you deserved it (6351)

On 07/29/2014 at 10:36pm - love - by anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got rear-ended because my ultra-clingy girlfriend wouldn't let go of my hand long enough for me to shift gears. FML

#21220481
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43364) - you deserved it (10303)

On 07/25/2014 at 5:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, I went on Facebook. The third post down was a selfie of my mom looking sad, with the caption, "God I need a good dicking." FML

#21218442
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50903) - you deserved it (11794)

On 07/23/2014 at 4:00pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend said we can't have sex with the light on anymore. He said he can never finish because the face I make when I orgasm makes him laugh. FML

#21216984
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36836) - you deserved it (23788)

On 07/22/2014 at 1:55am - intimacy - by teegtwo (woman) - United States

Today, I went to my boyfriend's house, intending to break up with him. Instead, I was greeted by his whole family throwing me a surprise party. I had to sit and listen to his whole family talk about what a great couple we are and how we're going to last forever. FML

#21215195
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54461) - you deserved it (8779)

On 07/20/2014 at 1:59pm - love - by I Feel Horrible - United States (California)

Today, I ran into my boyfriend of 5 years. The weird thing was that he was supposed to be in Iran. The even weirder thing was that he was with his wife and kids. FML

#21212869
138 comments

I agree, your life sucks (67007) - you deserved it (4891)

On 07/18/2014 at 12:49pm - love - by someonepleasehelpme (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went out to lunch with my girlfriend. I asked if she was going to finish her meal, hoping to steal a bite or two. She somehow took this as me calling her fat, threw her drink at me, and stormed off. I just wanted some steak. FML

#21209874
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47294) - you deserved it (10291)

On 07/15/2014 at 4:37pm - love - by Jeff - United States

Today, my wife was putting her finger in my bellybutton and making overly sexual noises. I thought this was all fun and games until I realized she was actually into this. FML

#21209385
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47879) - you deserved it (5318)

On 07/14/2014 at 11:25pm - intimacy - by thedoc (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while eating dinner with my boyfriend, I look up to see him staring at me, smiling. Hoping he wanted to say how lucky of a man he was who loved me deeply, I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "You can't smell that yet? It was a noxious one." FML

#21209203
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40212) - you deserved it (6018)

On 07/14/2014 at 7:48pm - love - by KaiyaOtaku1 (woman) - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • K'Naye's illustrated FML
  • Woohoo it's the weekend! Winter is all around some of us, but not in our hearts. To help fight off the cold and seasonal depression, this week we're taking a look at love and tenderness. It's what keeps…

Friday 21 November 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: