salvorican

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salvorican

60Fucked!

salvoricansalvorican
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 August 1994 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 6904
  • Number of comments : 271
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About salvorican : I hate description boxes.
1. Because I never know what to say about me.
2. I always choose something stupid to say.
3. I'm going to write shit anyway.

My life is literally work, the boyfriend, and my puppy Ryuu.
Ponies are freaking adorable.
Supernatural is love.
Skyrim is life.
Anime is everything.
House MD has changed me forever.
Horror is my obsession.
Pokemon taught me skill.
Video games made me who I am.

salvorican's page activity

Visits<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 4:24am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 12:36pm<b>frankmz</b> - the 05/14/2016 at 3:12am<b>JordanODST</b> - the 05/12/2016 at 12:55pm<b>TxAsMaD3</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 6:42pm<b>NYGiants1925</b> - the 04/30/2016 at 7:07pm<b>mkmon7</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:55pm<b>frostedfoster</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:21am<b>Rented_eyebrows</b> - the 04/24/2016 at 11:06am<b>gillyman</b> - the 04/23/2016 at 7:22pm<b>PRObullet15</b> - the 04/18/2016 at 8:06am<b>ButtStallion2k16</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 2:20pm<b>Jayroc</b> - the 04/16/2016 at 8:56am<b>anthonydpalm</b> - the 04/14/2016 at 9:02pm<b>SkullHQ</b> - the 04/13/2016 at 2:21am<b>The666Ghost</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 10:36am<b>jill97</b> - the 04/10/2016 at 8:59am<b>themysteriousfox</b> - the 04/04/2016 at 9:21pm

Fucked!<b>jbuckets_404</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 10:28am<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 05/17/2016 at 6:36pm<b>NYGiants1925</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 1:07am<b>The666Ghost</b> - the 04/11/2016 at 4:37pm<b>JadeOmega</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 7:04pm<b>magikarpsmurfs</b> - the 03/19/2016 at 10:47pm<b>TreeTreeMan</b> - the 01/27/2016 at 4:20pm<b>sythe511</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 4:56am<b>gobiteme2</b> - the 01/18/2016 at 12:54am<b>Sangue0608</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 1:10pm<b>tin_cup</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 4:48am<b>BigxXxDeal</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:39am<b>lfrider92</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 2:32am<b>Tenker</b> - the 01/12/2016 at 6:32am<b>DrAlmondNuts</b> - the 01/11/2016 at 11:49am<b>karacakal2</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 6:49am<b>joco4</b> - the 01/05/2016 at 1:19am<b>AyeTee77</b> - the 01/04/2016 at 6:53pm

salvorican's FML badges

Inception

You read an FML that mentions a badge, and in return you've been awarded a badge. A badge inside a badge.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

See all of salvorican's badges

salvorican's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked in on my little brother making a Devil's trap so he could capture the demon he thinks is possessing my hamster. FML

by lexigan4 / 10/29/2014 at 3:39pm / United Kingdom / Kids

Today, I was at the mall with my young daughter. I hate pooping in public but I really had to go so I brought her in with me. Thinking we were alone, I started to go and my daughter yelled, "Good job, mommy, you're using the potty like a big girl!" I then heard laughing. FML

by Anonymous / 10/23/2014 at 2:43pm / United States / Kids

Today, I walked into my house and saw it was flooded. I went upstairs to the bathroom to see the toilet overflowing and my boyfriend holding my dog over it so he could drink it. My boyfriend said he didn't know what else to do. FML

by anonymous / 10/16/2014 at 4:53pm / United States (Michigan) / Miscellaneous

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

by facepalm / 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

by longdrive / 10/14/2014 at 1:17am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

by bluevix / 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

by Anonymous / 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm / United States (Texas) / Love

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

by JulietMarie / 10/10/2014 at 3:12pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

by tw@ / 09/28/2014 at 11:30am / United Kingdom (Hertford) / Intimacy

Today, my husband felt dishonoured: his darling little girl, the love of his life, whom he's always considered pure, turns out to be pregnant. He's now warned her: she's grounded and that whoever did this to her had better not come hanging round the house. Pussy, two years old, is now housebound until her kittens are born. FML

by Anonyme / 09/26/2014 at 2:56am / France (Lorraine) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

by hahaohyeahwow / 09/24/2014 at 12:24am / United States (Michigan) / Intimacy

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

by RuinedTheMood / 09/21/2014 at 1:11am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

by anon / 08/31/2014 at 11:14am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

by AgentOrion / 08/29/2014 at 12:16am / United States (Alabama) / Miscellaneous

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

by whotouchedyou1 / 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm / United States (Texas) / Health