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salvorican

Offline (the 12/12/2014 at 4:35am) | Search for a member

salvorican

15Liked!

salvoricansalvorican
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 28 August 1994 (20 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 4231
  • Number of comments : 255
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 12 posted

About salvorican : I hate description boxes.
1. Because I never know what to say about me.
2. I always choose something stupid to say.
3. I'm going to write shit anyway.

My life is literally work, the boyfriend, and my puppy Ryuu.
Ponies are freaking adorable.
Supernatural is love.
Skyrim is life.
Anime is everything.
House MD has changed me forever.
Horror is my obsession.
Pokemon taught me skill.
Video games made me who I am.

salvorican's page activity

Visits<b>fantasyworld</b> - 16 hours ago<b>SaniK</b> - 21 hours ago<b>danNtara</b> - 22 hours ago<b>unicornlover13</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 10:58pm<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 12/14/2014 at 11:54am<b>911dragon10</b> - the 12/12/2014 at 2:06pm<b>Devindelon</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 8:35pm<b>sexymomo1234</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 10:34am<b>MrSassypants</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 8:32am<b>gary3768</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 1:39am<b>ComoEsJuan</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 7:24pm<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:56pm<b>ThePols</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:50pm<b>RMLrapemylife</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 6:15pm<b>TheSwegMaster69</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 5:33pm<b>Mario_mane</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 5:06pm<b>Ausdank</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:36pm<b>sdlr32787</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 11:14am

Liked!<b>SaniK</b> - the 12/11/2014 at 9:01am<b>spockadelic</b> - the 12/10/2014 at 12:56am<b>RA91</b> - the 12/09/2014 at 1:04pm<b>kingofthediamond</b> - the 11/09/2014 at 7:39am<b>fml0505</b> - the 11/07/2014 at 8:27am<b>kspear2</b> - the 11/06/2014 at 12:37am<b>HanuRohilla</b> - the 11/05/2014 at 12:57pm<b>Ardenor13</b> - the 11/04/2014 at 8:06pm<b>Enslaved</b> - the 10/27/2014 at 4:49am<b>kunal222</b> - the 10/16/2014 at 11:35pm<b>AirBusDriver</b> - the 10/15/2014 at 4:49pm<b>Edogg215</b> - the 10/01/2014 at 9:29pm<b>phew</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 7:21pm<b>Llama_Face89</b> - the 09/18/2014 at 4:27am<b>Mr_Saikaly</b> - the 08/28/2014 at 11:18am

salvorican's FML badges

Perfectionist

Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of salvorican's badges

salvorican's favorite FMLs

Today, coming home, I opened up my door to find my drunk boyfriend trying to teach our three baby parakeets to perch on his erect penis. FML

#21278553
123 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35576) - you deserved it (3733)

On 10/15/2014 at 7:36pm - misc - by facepalm (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I left for a fifteen-hour drive with two guys who won't stop talking in a Yoda voice. Sick of this nonsense, I am. FML

#21277425
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32974) - you deserved it (4456)

On 10/14/2014 at 1:17am - misc - by longdrive - United States (California)

Today, a nurse asked my relationship status. I answered, "Married". She then asked if there was any possibility of me being pregnant. I hardly contained my snort, before responding, "No, you have to have sex for that." I'm not sure what's worse, the fact that it's true or her laughter. FML

#21275225
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38013) - you deserved it (4996)

On 10/10/2014 at 9:25pm - intimacy - by bluevix (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I witnessed some greasy twat trying to chat a girl up by negging her, which is basically insulting a woman to lower her self-esteem so she's more likely to put out. "Goddamn negger", I muttered. "The fuck did you just say?!" yelled a black guy standing beside me. FML

#21275066
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31423) - you deserved it (14449)

On 10/10/2014 at 4:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my first compliment in over a year. It was from my gynecologist, saying I have a beautiful cervix. FML

#21275026
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32638) - you deserved it (2930)

On 10/10/2014 at 3:12pm - misc - by JulietMarie - United States (New York)

Today, my drunk husband came home, got into bed, and started humping the body pillow. He ended up whining about how I hadn't come yet, then angrily slurred that I must be cheating on him. All I could do was stay quiet and wonder how the idiot even made it home alive. FML

#21266933
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47391) - you deserved it (3524)

On 09/28/2014 at 11:30am - intimacy - by tw@ (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, my boyfriend and I were planning on having sex. He first excused himself to the bathroom, then returned with a sad face saying he had fumbled with himself in the bathroom to get "ready" and accidentally came. He said, "I was thinking of you though." FML

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex in the early hours of the morning. He said "Morning sex is the best thing to wake up to." Without thinking, I responded "Yeah, unless you're in prison." He lost his erection due to laughing so hard and now can't look at me without laughing. FML

#21262210
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39203) - you deserved it (9907)

On 09/21/2014 at 1:11am - intimacy - by RuinedTheMood (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, while finally about to make love with my long term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

#21249014
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45303) - you deserved it (4516)

On 08/31/2014 at 11:14am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I dreamed I was wrestling an alligator. I quickly woke up to my girlfriend yelling and me holding her in a headlock. FML

#21247589
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37370) - you deserved it (5010)

On 08/29/2014 at 12:16am - misc - by AgentOrion - United States (Alabama)

Today, while my teacher was demonstrating how to use the ultrasound equipment, we all figured out that I'm pregnant. FML

#21245451
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50721) - you deserved it (9747)

On 08/25/2014 at 10:37pm - health - by whotouchedyou1 - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend sent me a bunch of sexy pics and said to come over to her place. I thought she was in the mood for sex. Nope, she just wanted me to come over and hang a shelf, after which she sent me back home. FML

#21244207
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39365) - you deserved it (5874)

On 08/24/2014 at 1:51am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, a guy took me out on a date. His imaginary friends joined us. FML

#21244154
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38483) - you deserved it (3064)

On 08/24/2014 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to lose our virginity. When he saw blood, he panicked and started crying, convinced that he was bleeding out. FML

#21242605
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46365) - you deserved it (5176)

On 08/21/2014 at 5:24pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)



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