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sadlife

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  • Number of visits : 2825
  • Number of comments : 17
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 36 posted

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sadlife's page activity

Visits<b>perdix</b> - the 02/27/2010 at 9:47am

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sadlife's favorite FMLs

Today, I carved a pumpkin for Halloween. I thought it would be cool to carve my name, and have it shine through onto the wall behind it. I figured that if I carved my name backwards then it would show up correct on the wall. My name's Lana and now my wall says Anal. FML

#5954141
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11670) - you deserved it (44024)

On 10/23/2009 at 1:22am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

#5828114
224 comments

I agree, your life sucks (87713) - you deserved it (14667)

On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, it was my friend's paintball party and we were doing it in a forest nearby. When I arrived at his house, his parents said they already started, so I geared up and went out there to find that there was a note on a tree. It said 'Sorry', and then twenty people jumped from bushes and ambushed me. FML

#5699307
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34188) - you deserved it (11252)

On 10/07/2009 at 7:13am - misc - by shitballs_911 (man) - United Kingdom (Kingston upon Thames)

Today, I was sitting around a bonfire when an ember landed on my crotch. Without thinking, I quickly slapped at it and hit myself square in the nuts. FML

#5655008
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12384) - you deserved it (36016)

On 10/05/2009 at 12:16am - health - by Painful (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, while cleaning up, I dropped a box of thumbtacks, spilling them all over the floor. As I fumbled to pick them up, the power went out. FML

#5589145
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44880) - you deserved it (3354)

On 10/01/2009 at 6:31pm - misc - by Ouchies (woman) - United States (Florida) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I woke up to the realization that the 2-hour nap I wanted to take before I went out with my friends last night was actually a 12-hour nap. I missed everything. FML

#5579967
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12756) - you deserved it (29799)

On 10/01/2009 at 3:05am - misc - by Ataraxia (man) - United States (California) - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I came home from work and found my house egged, and bricks thrown through my windows. I called the police, and submitted a report. Later that night, I heard the doorbell ring. Nobody was at the house, but there was a note saying "Sorry, wrong house". FML

#5579779
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40028) - you deserved it (1854)

On 10/01/2009 at 2:43am - misc - by egged (man) - Singapore - moderated by Kevin Nealon

Today, I was looking at my wedding photos. The photographer moved onto the "candid" shots and thought it would be cute to have pics of us making out at the reception. I have blonde hair. The girl in the picture did not. FML

#5570675
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48458) - you deserved it (2577)

On 09/30/2009 at 6:57pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I found my biological father, who I have never met, on facebook and decided to message him. He blocked me. FML

#5410581
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52525) - you deserved it (6113)

On 09/22/2009 at 5:12am - misc - by snow (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I realized the person I had been habitually stealing bag lunches from at work made me a canned dog food sandwich. FML

#4976961
421 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18409) - you deserved it (358297)

On 09/01/2009 at 2:05pm - work - by Hairball (man) - United States (South Carolina)

Today, my husband woke me up at 3 AM by putting whipped cream on my hand and tickling my nose with a feather. FML

#4877720
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33150) - you deserved it (9239)

On 08/28/2009 at 3:51am - misc - by pistonchamp159 (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out why my 20 year-old girlfriend broke up with me. She was building everything she did to match her favorite TV show. The main character left her boyfriend in the exact way she left me. And the breakup email she sent me contained monologue from the TV show, word for word. FML

#4829994
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65219) - you deserved it (4518)

On 08/26/2009 at 3:09am - love - by micahmatt (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I went for a jog. While passing by my neighbor's house, their six year old son started throwing peanuts at me screaming, "I hope this kills you!" because I'm allergic to peanuts. FML

#4820623
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51889) - you deserved it (3226)

On 08/25/2009 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it was my birthday. My parents came into my room at 12:01 to surprise me. Do you know what fifteen year olds do at midnight? FML

#4734669
400 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43933) - you deserved it (22541)

On 08/22/2009 at 12:25pm - misc - by urmommmm (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I decided to cook dinner for my wife and kid. After a long day of preperation and cooking I asked them what they thought of it. My 12 year old son then says, "I would say it tastes like shit but not even shit tastes this bad!" My wife then laughed and gave him a high-five. FML

#4728013
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38980) - you deserved it (5255)

On 08/22/2009 at 2:29am - kids - by NoCookForYou (man) - United States (New York)



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