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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2338
  • Number of comments : 66
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About sacmaster : Whoever's reading this...hello!! I'm glad and honored that you chose to spend the past 5-10 seconds of your life viewing my profile. I hope it was an enjoyable experience :)

But really, I'm just a man who loves an fml induced laugh while on the shitter, particularly by way of the comments section.

sacmaster's page activity

Visits<b>eski2015</b> - the 05/20/2016 at 9:46pm<b>MdMan3</b> - the 11/28/2015 at 8:59pm<b>Aukrenchi</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 8:37am<b>buckstop1</b> - the 08/20/2015 at 11:15am<b>Amateur_Dank</b> - the 05/30/2015 at 7:49pm<b>denaeb123</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 3:59pm<b>ultimatebobness</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 10:07am<b>RandomHavoc1</b> - the 04/10/2014 at 10:13pm<b>BirdieCurls</b> - the 03/28/2014 at 6:31pm<b>akballerchicity</b> - the 03/16/2014 at 11:41pm<b>TheNelson3</b> - the 02/28/2014 at 4:50pm<b>alex_the_lion</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 11:38am<b>TheTacoSlayer</b> - the 01/26/2014 at 1:59am<b>cammy_delo15</b> - the 10/31/2013 at 11:25pm<b>pimp_named_mitch</b> - the 10/30/2013 at 8:19am<b>LoPnado9</b> - the 10/12/2013 at 12:42am<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 4:56pm<b>SheBeNeNe</b> - the 09/26/2013 at 5:32pm

Fucked!<b>denaeb123</b> - the 02/06/2015 at 9:59pm

sacmaster's FML badges

Happy Ending

Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

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sacmaster's favorite FMLs

Today, I was on a plane and realized that the woman next to me was hiding a hedgehog in a plastic container. I'm severely afraid of hedgehogs but not wanting to give the woman up and get her in trouble, I tried to stay quiet. Which led to me to quietly hyperventilate and pass out on the plane. FML

by scaredofhedges / 01/07/2013 at 5:21am / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I learned that toddlers cannot fully digest raisins. I learned this first-hand when my 15-month-old began pooping them whole. In the bathtub. FML

by Raela / 01/04/2013 at 11:59am / United States (New Jersey) / Kids

Today, I found out that there's something my new wife hates more than spiders. Black people. FML

by WellShit / 01/03/2013 at 9:19pm / United States (Minnesota) / Health

Today, my grandmother said to me, "You look just like your mother did at your age. Except you're fatter of course." FML

by poro123 / 11/05/2012 at 12:39am / United Kingdom / Miscellaneous

Today, after weeks of wondering if my cat has a fetish for licking my bed covers, I finally witnessed him licking up an ant off of the covers. Turns out that my bed is infested with ants. FML

by lifelike / 10/29/2012 at 12:23am / United States (California) / Animals

Today, at work as a massage therapist, I pulled down the guy's blanket slightly to massage his lower back. There were shit stains spreading from his ass crack all the way to his mid-back. When I told him, he wanted me to massage there anyway. FML

by Lunazel93 / 10/22/2012 at 12:07am / Canada (Ontario) / Work

Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML

by stoych / 10/08/2012 at 3:14am / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I came home to find my eight-year-old son had basically set fire to the kitchen, after trying to practice some kind of stupid shit he'd seen on TV called "fire bending." FML

by SadDad / 09/22/2012 at 2:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Kids

Today, while dog sitting my neighbor's Great Dane, I decided to order pizza. As soon as I received it, the dog stood in the hallway staring at me. As soon as I moved, he ran full force and knocked me into the door, causing me to fall and drop the pizza, which he promptly devoured in front of me. FML

by Grauncho / 09/22/2012 at 10:12am / United States (Illinois) / Animals

Today, as I was waiting for my girlfriend in the street, I saw a woman who looked a lot like her. I ran towards her, my arms in the air ready to give her a hug, only to realise it wasn't her. I then had to pass the woman, my arms in the air, still running. FML

by minibuch1505 / 09/21/2012 at 7:31am / Miscellaneous

Today, I had to take my son to the emergency room for shooting himself in the ass with a BB gun. FML

by myfamilyisodd / 10/15/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (North Carolina) / Kids

Today, after numerous attempts, my car door still wouldn't unlock. After going ballistic on the lock, the key broke off inside. I then realized it wasn't my car. FML

by Smile / 11/26/2008 at 11:21pm / Transportation