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ruthlessredd

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ruthlessredd

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  • Number of visits : 59
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  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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ruthlessredd's favorite FMLs

Today, I met my new neighbor. His wi-fi access point is named "TheRapistDownstairs." FML

#17483730
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36912) - you deserved it (3464)

On 08/15/2011 at 8:30pm - misc - by creepedoutlady - United States

Today, I came out to my parents. They nodded empathetically throughout my entire speech and told me repeatedly that it was okay. As I smiled and stood up, my dad asked, "But you're still going to marry a guy, right?" FML

#15767181
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38575) - you deserved it (7545)

On 04/13/2011 at 6:19am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was waiting for the bus while wearing my FML shirt. A passer-by stopped, stared at me for a moment, and said, "I agree, your life sucks." FML

#15528931
171 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27995) - you deserved it (54318) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/28/2011 at 9:51am - misc - by Danou - Sent from mobile version

Today, we were going to Disney World all the way from North Carolina. After 12 hours of driving, my kids started fighting and complaining. My husband finally said, "If I hear you guys one more time we're turning around and going back home." They annoyed him once again, and we actually went home. FML

#15381959
362 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48376) - you deserved it (7856)

On 03/19/2011 at 12:00pm - kids - by jaimie - United States (Florida)

Today, my father came over to my house. I realized there were condoms on the table, so I subtly moved a vase to hide them. He then gave me an unamused look and said "I know you have sex. You've been married for nine years. Grow the fuck up, dumbass." FML

#15356314
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18225) - you deserved it (82869)

On 03/17/2011 at 7:52pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, while in my room sleeping, my little brother deemed it necessary to come in and drop a book on my face. When I sat up with a now bloody nose, he looked at me, pointed, and said "You've just been facebooked" and ran away giggling. FML

#14806356
210 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43322) - you deserved it (7937)

On 02/02/2011 at 12:57am - kids - by Malakai - United States

Today, I posted a status on Facebook saying I was depressed and needed someone to talk to. Someone commented on it saying "Just kill yourself". It got 20 likes. FML

Today, my virgin girlfriend who wanted to lose her virginity to me got on Google, and quizzed me on how to properly put on a condom. She doesn't trust me. FML

#13764909
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24525) - you deserved it (7831)

On 11/08/2010 at 1:23pm - intimacy - by wow (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I told my 3 year old daughter to behave or I'd spank her. She looked right at me and said "Bring it." FML

#13026235
416 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31685) - you deserved it (28383)

On 09/12/2010 at 9:38pm - kids - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

#12305756
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38374) - you deserved it (10217)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:25am - intimacy - by Embarressed... (woman) - United Kingdom (Derbyshire)

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he played with and named my boobs. Complete with a full skit where "Maxie" killed "Nathanial." FML

#10707912
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29485) - you deserved it (7622)

On 05/23/2010 at 5:10am - intimacy - by Maxie-Nathanial - United States

Today, my teacher compared the female reproductive system to Shrek's head. Never again will I be able to watch the movies. FML

#7340967
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23027) - you deserved it (3349)

On 01/14/2010 at 4:56pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I called my boyfriend upset because my best friend has begun stripping to pay for school. His response was, "Where and what time does she work?" FML

#6765216
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29607) - you deserved it (7946)

On 12/15/2009 at 4:49pm - love - by notcool (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was getting mugged. In shock, I said, "Are you mugging me?!" To which the mugger responded, "Duh, do you think I grabbed you for your looks?" FML

#4274462
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48245) - you deserved it (6957)

On 08/04/2009 at 2:41am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I finally thought that my mother was okay with me being a lesbian. Then, over dinner, she turns to me and says "So, do you still think you like girls, or are you going to start being normal again?" FML

#3237223
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52039) - you deserved it (10017)

On 06/26/2009 at 10:22am - love - by shouldhaveknown (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)



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