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rustydiamonds

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rustydiamonds

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rustydiamondsrustydiamonds
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 7 July 1999 (15 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 223
  • Number of comments : 0
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About rustydiamonds : Oh, God who Am I?!

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rustydiamonds's favorite FMLs

Today, I made a speech in front of my entire graduating class and their families, despite my fear of public speaking. It seemed to go well and I got a big round of applause at the end. Then I panicked and instead of waving, I lifted my arm straight out in a Hitler salute. FML

#21379710
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31930) - you deserved it (6484)

On 03/22/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by oooooops (man) - United States

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

#21362166
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35836) - you deserved it (2796)

On 02/23/2015 at 10:46pm - intimacy - by sammy18f (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, my crush was giving me a ride home. As we pulled up to my house, he looked into my eyes with a sweet smile and said the words every girl wants to hear - "Do you give head?" FML

#21339980
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35672) - you deserved it (5304)

On 01/19/2015 at 12:35am - intimacy - by anon - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out my 7-year-old daughter really did lie about my husband's "other girlfriend" as revenge for being grounded, and that he never cheated on me at all. We're well into our divorce proceedings and he won't forgive me for not believing him when he denied it. FML

#21327839
305 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23402) - you deserved it (42532)

On 12/31/2014 at 2:00pm - kids - by skanula414 (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)

Today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. She was so excited that she had a severe asthma attack and ended up in hospital. Her answer was yes, but her parents won't let me anywhere near her now. They say I'm lucky they haven't sued me for "trying to kill her". FML

#21312768
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40013) - you deserved it (2258)

On 12/06/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I heard what sounded like high-pitched feminine moaning coming from my son's room. I knocked and walked in, expecting to catch him red handed with a girl. He'd just beaten his high score on Flappy Bird. FML

#21262395
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35804) - you deserved it (9539)

On 09/21/2014 at 11:33am - intimacy - by royallymessedup - United Kingdom

Today, I saw my teacher using her phone in the middle of class, so to joke around with her, seeing as we're on pretty good terms, I said: "Using your phone in class? For shame." She looks me in the eyes and says, "Would it be ok if I told you I'm arranging my father's funeral?" FML

#21256116
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43857) - you deserved it (16373)

On 09/11/2014 at 2:33am - misc - by lolwut - United States (Oregon)

Today, my teenage daughter tried to convince me that the UK is a part of Canada. After I pulled out a map to prove her wrong, she got all angry and defensive, and said that nobody's perfect at "geometry". My daughter is an idiot. FML

#21122867
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49910) - you deserved it (9967)

On 04/25/2014 at 5:21pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boyfriend drove 20 miles to come see me. The closest we got to intimacy was him showing me how he could unlock his iPhone 5s with his penis. FML

#21118643
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48812) - you deserved it (7087)

On 04/21/2014 at 12:04am - intimacy - by Taylor - United States (Iowa)

Today, things were getting heated with the girlfriend. We were mostly naked, but mostly wouldn't do, so I kissed her deeply and whispered into her ear, "You should lose some weight". Clothes. I meant to say clothes. FML

Today, my 14-year-old son's pathetic rebellion came to a head. He ran away from home, leaving a note saying he hates me and was leaving forever to be part of a gang his friends had formed. He came back an hour later crying. His whole gang had gotten mugged, which he somehow blamed me for. FML

#21102946
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49152) - you deserved it (6070)

On 04/02/2014 at 4:10pm - kids - by I Have Failed (man) - Spain (Madrid)

Today, I was assigned to fill in for a French teacher who was out sick. I had asked the class to name some French-speaking countries. I called on one girl and she replied, "Uh, Europe. That's, like, the only other one, right?" Nobody disagreed. I'm filling in for the rest of the month. FML

#20929522
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42518) - you deserved it (2735)

On 10/21/2013 at 9:40pm - work - by :| - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
365 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40363) - you deserved it (12428)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I have two black eyes. The first one I got from the girl whose ass I mistakenly grabbed at a party last night. The other one I got from my girlfriend when I explained the first one. FML

#18240312
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15945) - you deserved it (30480)

On 11/13/2011 at 7:11pm - misc - by ThatHurts (man) - Canada

Today, I was naked on top of my boyfriend looking lovingly into his eyes. He then started to use my boobs as punching bags while singing "Eye of the Tiger". FML

#14305984
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41860) - you deserved it (8815)

On 12/23/2010 at 1:36am - intimacy - by nemo518 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)



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