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runner2731

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runner2731

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 584
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About runner2731 : I am a guy.

runner2731's page activity

Visits<b>ashlyn_warren</b> - the 11/22/2013 at 8:15pm<b>heartlessbiotch</b> - the 09/04/2013 at 7:32pm<b>kmiller194</b> - the 06/02/2013 at 12:12am<b>klovemachine</b> - the 03/07/2013 at 2:25am

runner2731's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

runner2731's favorite FMLs

Today, I was given a lapdance by a pregnant stripper. FML

#19720443
219 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13928) - you deserved it (36515)

On 06/02/2012 at 11:16am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, when I was ordering pizza, I got a text from my mom saying "I love you". When the man thanked me I accidentally said, "I love you too." FML

#19719938
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23472) - you deserved it (4800)

On 06/02/2012 at 8:47am - misc - by lol112 - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I said to my boyfriend that he makes the same noises when he smells bacon as he does when we have sex. Now everytime we have sex, he whispers "Bacon..." in my ear. FML

#19719748
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15002) - you deserved it (28422)

On 06/02/2012 at 6:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Northamptonshire)

Today, my parents grounded me for finding their stash of weed. The irony is killing me right now. FML

#19719129
196 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36010) - you deserved it (2601)

On 06/02/2012 at 1:43am - misc - by ironyisabitch - United States (California)

Today, a homeless guy grabbed me and started ranting that "the Mayans were right" or some shit. He was making about as much sense as Charlie Sheen outside of a padded cell, so I shoved him away. That's when he decided to pull a knife and chase me all the way to my car. FML

#19716436
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23593) - you deserved it (3773)

On 06/01/2012 at 5:08pm - misc - by kay (man) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, it was my last day at school before I graduate next week. Ten minutes into lunch break, I was brutally nailed in the neck by a football. Now, not only do I look like I was given a hickey by the Jolly Green Giant himself, I have to wear a neck brace at my graduation ceremony. FML

#19715623
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23175) - you deserved it (1636)

On 06/01/2012 at 2:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, Child Protective Services came to my house, because my 7-year-old son told people at school that he was uncomfortable sleeping in his uncle's bed. I had to explain to them that the uncle in question died 2 years ago, and that's why it felt weird. FML

#19713901
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31100) - you deserved it (2351)

On 06/01/2012 at 3:02am - kids - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I discovered that my three-year-old daughter has mastered the art of pickpocketing. While I was driving to work this morning, my car broke down. I reached in my pocket to call AAA on my cell, only to find her squirt gun in its place. FML

#19612373
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19767) - you deserved it (2375)

On 05/12/2012 at 4:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I came home with a friend to find my mom scratching my dad's butt with a fork. FML

#18754752
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30854) - you deserved it (2308)

On 01/09/2012 at 4:39am - misc - by maruskasommers (woman) - Czech Republic (Pardubicky kraj)

Today, I was screaming at my neighbor to shut his dog up. After 30 minutes of bellowing, he yelled back that it was my dog that was barking. He was right. FML

#18622052
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6959) - you deserved it (48290)

On 12/27/2011 at 2:12am - misc - by Yo mom - United States (California)

Today, I had to take two buses home from a friend's house. After waiting in the cold for the second bus for 40 minutes, it finally came and I realized that I'd left my wallet on the first bus. It took me 2 hours to walk home and I was locked out because my house key is attached to my wallet. FML

#18541076
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29108) - you deserved it (6820)

On 12/18/2011 at 12:25am - misc - by Kayla (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, my parents woke me up by pouring a glass of freezing cold water over my head. Their reason? They were 'bored'. FML

#16022547
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31260) - you deserved it (4574)

On 05/02/2011 at 7:00pm - misc - by missmirror (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, I played Angry Birds for two hours. I got so into the game, I failed to remember that I was sitting on a public toilet. I only realized this when the janitor came to check on me. FML

#15901266
153 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10795) - you deserved it (47880)

On 04/23/2011 at 9:02pm - animals - by bobo - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up and went to the bathroom and took a massive piss. Then I actually woke up, well and truly soaked. FML

#15098131
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29064) - you deserved it (8828)

On 02/24/2011 at 1:29am - misc - by JustADream (man) - United States (California)

Today, I had an asthma attack. I grabbed my inhaler and found peanut butter on it. I'm extremely allergic to peanuts. FML

#14997625
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42024) - you deserved it (3497)

On 02/16/2011 at 12:14am - health - by Anonymous - United States (Minnesota)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

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Friday 17 October 2014

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