Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

rt567

Offline (the 09/20/2014 at 5:32pm) | Search for a member

rt567

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Saturday 23 August 1997 (17 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 566
  • Number of comments : 45
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About rt567 : love basketball, name is Talia, and fighting paralysis.

rt567's page activity

Visits<b>rrrgggbbb</b> - yesterday at 9:37pm<b>ZackFev</b> - the 10/10/2014 at 2:29pm<b>abattior</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 10:57pm<b>lexrawrzums</b> - the 10/08/2014 at 4:23am<b>addictedtoIASIP</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 8:09pm<b>BlazeArmy</b> - the 09/17/2014 at 10:48pm<b>Loomunati</b> - the 09/08/2014 at 4:51pm<b>ndnpride88</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 4:55pm<b>Evil20071</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 10:03am<b>Lars93</b> - the 09/02/2014 at 3:41am<b>gary3768</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 11:47pm<b>Zoey_M</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 1:52am<b>omgwhattt</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 12:37am<b>bailemat</b> - the 08/04/2014 at 10:31am<b>Tobiaspe</b> - the 07/31/2014 at 6:17pm<b>ThatSweaterGuy</b> - the 07/29/2014 at 6:21pm<b>CFB_FRS</b> - the 07/26/2014 at 10:54pm<b>aseim9497</b> - the 07/25/2014 at 9:47am

rt567's FML badges

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Judgmental

You’ve now voted that they totally deserved it more than 100 times.

See all of rt567's badges

rt567's favorite FMLs

Today, I was talking dirty to my long-distance lover while touching myself, when a cockroach fell from my ceiling and landed on the hand I was molesting myself with. FML

#20915065
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48189) - you deserved it (16231)

On 10/10/2013 at 11:40am - intimacy - by DisgustinglyFrustrated - Argentina (Santa Fe)

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

#20911508
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41528) - you deserved it (3592)

On 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm - misc - by Agax (man) - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally texted a picture of my cock to my dad. FML

#20907559
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25692) - you deserved it (77838)

On 10/04/2013 at 7:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while sitting in a crowded waiting room at the doctor's office, my 5-year-old daughter pointed at my 6-year-old son's crotch and boomed, "MOM, WHY DOES ANDY HAVE A FINGER DOWN THERE?" to which he yelled, "IT'S CALLED A COCK!" FML

#20898150
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48756) - you deserved it (6373)

On 09/27/2013 at 4:00pm - kids - by SerenityJ (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to a very unpleasant feeling. Apparently, the tattoo I got on my arm a couple of days ago attracted hundreds of ants during its healing process. They were literally carrying away pieces of my skin. I can not get the feeling or image out of my head. FML

#20846451
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53000) - you deserved it (5950)

On 08/20/2013 at 3:04pm - misc - by aly55a_mariie (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while cleaning my ears with Q-tips, I came in my pants. FML

#20835942
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48088) - you deserved it (17157)

On 08/13/2013 at 7:53pm - intimacy - by ANON (man) - United States (California)

Today, my father shot my fiancé. He's fine, but the wedding is off. FML

#20812145
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61219) - you deserved it (4175)

On 07/30/2013 at 8:07pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I got a message from my brother on Facebook that read, "They're watching you." This wouldn't have been such a big deal if he hadn't been dead for two years. FML

#20773595
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (76057) - you deserved it (3700)

On 07/10/2013 at 1:24am - misc - by Wtf (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I walked in on my 14-year-old son apparently practicing his oral sex skills on the crotch of one of his sister's Barbie dolls. FML

#20765717
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51057) - you deserved it (4866)

On 07/05/2013 at 6:45pm - kids - by The fuck, junior? (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, while doing a fun genetics game in Biology, I found out that I was adopted. Turns out the game wasn't so fun. FML

#20661511
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (54238) - you deserved it (3033)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:51pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, while mopping floors at the police station, an inmate pissed on the floor, demanded that I suck his dick, begged me for a glass of water and finally informed me that he would kill my family. I said nothing and he started weeping softly. I laughed, but slipped in his piss and broke my arm. FML

#20529783
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37045) - you deserved it (12422)

On 03/03/2013 at 5:21pm - work - by JimmyT (man) - Norway (Hordaland)

Today, I was sitting cross-legged, idly jerkin' the gherkin. I guess I got slightly carried away, because I zoned out, forgot where I was aiming, and came all over the side of my face, up my nose and into my eye. FML

Today, while getting a hernia exam, I accidentally ran my fingers through my doctor's hair. FML

#20188881
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20404) - you deserved it (7851)

On 12/03/2012 at 12:06am - health - by WTFFAIL (man) - Canada (Quebec)

Today, I went to Hollister with my grandmother. She immediately started yelling about the music being too loud, and ordered the staff to "shut the damn thing off". She was yelling at a bunch of mannequins. FML

#20186953
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22383) - you deserved it (4082)

On 12/01/2012 at 5:53pm - misc - by time to put you down, gran (woman) - United States

Today, I realized that the bird I supposedly heard during the night throughout my childhood is actually the sound my mom makes when she comes. FML

#20160628
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38824) - you deserved it (2699)

On 11/12/2012 at 4:20pm - intimacy - by Heather - United States (Maryland)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: