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rouxvanity

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rouxvanity

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  • Number of visits : 538
  • Number of comments : 15
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 18 posted

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rouxvanity's favorite FMLs

Today, I was patting my kitten who was asleep underneath the blanket on my lap. My roommate walked in and gave me disgusted look. She thought I was playing with myself. FML

#13624722
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21368) - you deserved it (5711)

On 10/28/2010 at 8:00am - intimacy - by djoe - Australia (South Australia)

Today, I found out I received a "D" on my ethics exam, not because I did not know the information or did not follow the correct guidelines for writing the moral arguments, but because according to my professor my moral values are wrong. FML

Today, I found out that my 43 year old wife has been having a cyber relationship with a 14 year old kid on Halo. FML

#13589464
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40388) - you deserved it (3964)

On 10/25/2010 at 12:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, it was my first day as a mailman. One of the houses got a bunch of cards, and the owner coincidentally opened the door as I arrived. So I said to the owner that someone in the house must really be popular. He replied, "She died this Tuesday." FML

#13587554
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29181) - you deserved it (5906)

On 10/25/2010 at 7:03am - misc - by Username - Sent from mobile version

Today, I asked my boyfriend in a sexy way "What should we do now, honey?" He answered, "Suck my dick?" I said "I was thinking of something more... romantic." He replied "Suck my dick in the moonlight?" FML

#13432324
274 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35598) - you deserved it (20834)

On 10/13/2010 at 9:20am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Spain (Asturias)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend of 4 years, telling him he needed to be more responsible, and stop relying on me for everything. When I told him to leave, he told me he needed some gas money. FML

#13205428
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26694) - you deserved it (5030)

On 09/26/2010 at 3:20am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I found out that the cause of the recent pain in my chest was that I had a torn muscle. What caused this? I sneezed. FML

#13093344
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23592) - you deserved it (2811)

On 09/18/2010 at 12:21am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I untied the rope that was tied to my dog's collar because it was wrapped around the tree choking him. He immediately ran off down the street. I had to chase him barefoot in my boxers for 20 minutes till he got tired. FML

#13091874
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19155) - you deserved it (8512)

On 09/17/2010 at 10:34pm - misc - by muffins69 (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I was doing my homework on the computer when my dad walked by with a plate of food, threw his fork at me, and said "POSTURE!" FML

#13087587
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22706) - you deserved it (6531)

On 09/17/2010 at 4:33pm - misc - by huwauw (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, while tearfully telling my closest friends that I had miscarried my first pregnancy, the first thing out of their mouths was, 'So, does this mean you're going to start drinking with us again?' FML

#13071693
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36626) - you deserved it (3854)

On 09/16/2010 at 6:59am - kids - by mommymo (woman) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, while grocery shopping, my Dad asked me what I wanted for 'Din-Dins' while scratching his nuts. In a crowded aisle. Wearing short shorts. FML

#13071256
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28349) - you deserved it (2843)

On 09/16/2010 at 5:04am - misc - by itchybollos - Australia

Today, the guy I hooked up with last weekend texted me that I needed to "landscape my front lawn." FML

#9155913
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9924) - you deserved it (24509)

On 03/17/2010 at 8:48am - intimacy - by Bushfan101 - Sent from mobile version

Today, I put on some goggles on in the pool, only to go underwater and see an old man "discreetly" jerking it. FML

#9152447
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33017) - you deserved it (3882)

On 03/17/2010 at 2:12am - intimacy - by today -

Today, I found out why my roommate and best friend comes home late three nights a week. She goes to get drunk with some guy, then goes back to his house to hook up. Who is this guy? The guy I've been dating for three years. FML

#9139236
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32037) - you deserved it (2630)

On 03/16/2010 at 7:17pm - love - by latenightbite - United States

Today, I woke up to go pee and my cat followed me into the bathroom as usual. Then, in a not so usual fashion, she tried to jump from the sink to the top of the toilet, missed, and fell into the bowl while I was peeing. I'm scratched in a bad place, I have urine to clean up off the bathroom floor, and a traumatized cat. FML

#9135717
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31680) - you deserved it (4585)

On 03/16/2010 at 4:51pm - animals - by Adam (man) - United States (Florida)



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