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rossdavids

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rossdavids
  • Town/Country : Ireland
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 December 1995 (18 years)
  • Number of visits : 126
  • Number of comments : 13
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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rossdavids's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

It’s in the can

Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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rossdavids's favorite FMLs

Today, I joked with a pregnant girl in a state juvenile correctional facility where I work that eating a lot of candy would damage the unborn baby's teeth. Without batting an eye, she responded that she would simply "eat some toothpaste after the candy." FML

Today, I was at a job interview for a position I really needed. Somehow, the interviewer and I started talking about fishing. I joked, "I'm a master baiter." Needless to say, I didn't get the job. FML

#20833743
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27108) - you deserved it (37681)

On 08/12/2013 at 1:11pm - work - by master baiter - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend was suspended from work after she was caught fucking one of her co-workers. FML

#20827542
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57194) - you deserved it (3911)

On 08/08/2013 at 4:20pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Slough)

Today, my girlfriend actually yelled, "Why are you making this all about YOU?!" after I confronted her over cheating on me. FML

#20681698
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41899) - you deserved it (2439)

On 05/23/2013 at 12:40pm - love - by a single fuck (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, I tried to show my boyfriend's mom a picture of my prom dress on my phone. She scrolled to the right to find a picture of her son, naked. FML

#20642331
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40649) - you deserved it (71520)

On 05/05/2013 at 1:44am - intimacy - by beyondembarrassed - United States

Today, it's my birthday. My family put a bouquet of balloons outside my room for me to find when I woke up. I walked out of my room, saw the balloons, screamed, and fell down the stairs. FML

#20587655
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37961) - you deserved it (21819)

On 04/13/2013 at 5:21am - misc - by really? - United States

Today, my parents asked me if I was sexually active. My grandma then screamed from upstairs, "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45068) - you deserved it (13554)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

Today, I was walking down the street in the dark, and the woman in front of me kept looking back nervously. I jokingly assured her that I wasn't a mugger. She then took out a knife and mugged me. FML

#20505342
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38378) - you deserved it (4332)

On 02/13/2013 at 7:00pm - money - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I was running late for work and quickly grabbed my outfit from the dryer. I heard the crackling of static as I took out my shirt. I didn't think anything of it, until later when my co-worker pointed out I had a thong stuck to my back. FML

#20491168
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25259) - you deserved it (6885)

On 02/03/2013 at 2:32am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out my best friend has been stealing hundreds of dollars from me and my fiancé. My wedding is tomorrow morning. Guess who my best man is. FML

#20483262
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27616) - you deserved it (2234)

On 01/28/2013 at 4:01pm - love - by weddingsalwayssuck - United States (New York)

Today, someone put a whole packet of glitter on the blades of my ceiling fan. Too bad I only noticed when I turned it on. FML

#20482822
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27767) - you deserved it (3475)

On 01/28/2013 at 8:55am - misc - by hopelessteej (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML

#20480724
271 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15560) - you deserved it (34947)

On 01/27/2013 at 1:10am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, I found a lost dog and called the owner. When he arrived, I thought it would be cute to put the dog down so he would run back into his owner's arms, like in movies. As soon as I put the dog down, it ran away again. FML

#20469405
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16780) - you deserved it (35729)

On 01/20/2013 at 11:34am - animals - by DrakeB (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked my mom what her biggest craving was when she was pregnant with me. Her answer: an abortion. FML

#20449894
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47721) - you deserved it (4600)

On 01/09/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by kk - United States

Today, I played a game of Monopoly with my friends. Since I'm of Greek origin, they thought it would be funny to make me start with a €100,000 debt. FML

#20398504
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25347) - you deserved it (4805) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 12/13/2012 at 9:25pm - money - by Money-money-money (woman) - France



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