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roslene

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roslene

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 275
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About roslene : I'm awesome Bay-Bee!:)
;D MOOSE &&LLAMAS!!!

roslene's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

roslene's favorite FMLs

Today, my mom looked through my browser history and saw Chatroulette. She thought I'd gotten into online gambling, and wouldn't believe me when I explained what it really was. After I insisted on showing her, the first chat window to open contained cocks as far as the eye could see. FML

#16488839
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21610) - you deserved it (38024)

On 06/03/2011 at 8:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, after teaching my 4 year old son about the concept of "Stranger Danger," we had gone to a park full of people. When I walked up to him to tell him we had to leave, he ran, screaming "Stranger! Don't touch me!" FML

#16028300
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34417) - you deserved it (7228)

On 05/03/2011 at 1:01am - kids - by armywife980 -

Today, I found that the love of my life is 3.5 inches, fully erect. My cell phone is bigger than that. FML

#15749213
781 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66883) - you deserved it (14061)

On 04/12/2011 at 12:00am - intimacy - by Artic (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I accidentally clamped my hair straightener down on my ear. Eleven hours later, it still feels like I have a burning, swollen fireball hanging off the side of my head. FML

#15681998
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26591) - you deserved it (11143)

On 04/07/2011 at 5:18pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I was trying to go to sleep when I heard my sister come home from the bar. I fell asleep and woke up an hour later to see my sister squatting in my dresser drawer. I asked her what she was doing and she said "I'm peeing." FML

#14117268
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28721) - you deserved it (2356)

On 12/07/2010 at 6:08am - work - by jessefonsexy. (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I have both a cold and a period. Tomorrow, I will have a cold, my period and my wisdom teeth taken out. FML

#10719065
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45718) - you deserved it (3327)

On 05/23/2010 at 8:22pm - misc - by Unlucky (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went for a jog. While passing by my neighbor's house, their six year old son started throwing peanuts at me screaming, "I hope this kills you!" because I'm allergic to peanuts. FML

#4820623
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51928) - you deserved it (3229)

On 08/25/2009 at 8:52pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I received a text from my girlfriend to break up with me. I was upset. One minute later another text from her said "sorry, wrong person." FML

#4618484
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61336) - you deserved it (3205)

On 08/18/2009 at 1:06am - misc - by Anonymous - Kazakhstan (Almaty)

Today, I asked out one of the girls that hangs out in my group of friends (the same group I have been hanging out for three years). She stared at me for a couple of seconds then said " who the hell are you?" FML

#2459648
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46655) - you deserved it (4260)

On 05/31/2009 at 9:04am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my 3-year-old said, "Mommy, I can share my teddy grahams with you." I said, "Thanks, honey, you're so sweet." And I ate a few. When I popped the last one in my mouth, I said, "Oh no, all gone!" She said, "That's okay, I have more." Then pulled the next handful out of her underwear. FML

#1918683
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58391) - you deserved it (6936)

On 05/13/2009 at 9:45pm - kids - by chelserusera (woman) - United States (Texas)



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